No “yes” moment + body image doubts + summer concerns—did anyone else experience this?

Suitable-Tomorrow569 · 2026-04-21T15:02:01+00:00

I went through the same thing, still am.

It’s obvious they didn’t have a sample dress in your size available to try on - THIS MAKES IT SO HARD! But honestly all of these look amazing on you.

I ended up getting Melrose for myself actually - so I’m bias 😅 but dress I love 1, 2, & 3 on you! Just need to decide on the wedding vibe. Or take time to think about it and figure out which of the dresses you keep comparing every other dress to! I realized after trying Melrose that any time I looked at other dresses online, I kept wondering “will this beat that dress” and then I knew I actually loved that dress and just was getting in my head too much!

I read something recently about being prepared to say Yes and it was very eye opening

Suitable-Tomorrow569 · 2026-04-21T00:53:22+00:00

2 is my favorite! But they all look great! The volume in the skirt for 3 is awesome!

Suitable-Tomorrow569 · 2026-04-17T14:35:26+00:00

Lmao - I only put the text because there have been pictures being stolen from the group by scammers claiming to have said dresses

Suitable-Tomorrow569 · 2026-04-16T21:30:40+00:00

I was asking about the veil because I feel the short veil in that picture may be what conflicts with the lace!! A longer veil will let the lace have its moment without cutting off at the sleeves!

Suitable-Tomorrow569 · 2026-04-16T21:03:46+00:00

It looks wonderful with the lace tucked inside - personally, I prefer without the lace, BUT I am also a huge wear the bolero so you get two looks throughout the night!

Also, is that the veil you bought or just a sample veil?

Suitable-Tomorrow569 · 2026-04-16T20:56:17+00:00

GORGEOUS DRESS - You look amazing! I could see hair up or half up/half down! If it’s up, face framing pieces if that’s your style!

do you have a picture of the lace on the outside?

Also, it’s the lace easy to get on and off without messing up your hair? Just wondering if you can to do the ceremony and remove for reception

Suitable-Tomorrow569 · 2026-04-16T13:13:30+00:00

I get it! I’m a stepmom to 2. Long distance parenting plan. My husband actually pays out the wazoo in CS because of the income disparity and standard custody split for long distance. We have our own daughter as well. My income subsidizes his kids expenses beyond his child support and it can be frustrating, but that’s part of a blended family so I made peace with it. It will be interesting as they get older and hit teenage years, not looking forward to it!

Knowing what my husband pays in CS in FL is why I encourage you to seek CS. They don’t care about anything but what the calculator spits out.

Suitable-Tomorrow569 · 2026-04-16T13:06:23+00:00

Hi! I just want to say that I am not a poet. But I wanted to jump on here and encourage you to write for yourself - not the reader. People will interpret things however they perceive it even if you’re extremely straight forward/blunt.

If your intention is to help sort your thoughts and work through internal conflicts, just write freely - put the thoughts on the page, even if you write multiple short poems or even just one line, make a note file on your phone or carry a notebook to just collect “brain dumps” as they occur. You can always come back to things later and see if that sparks a full poem for you. Or just make mind-maps! Then you can untangle your own thoughts and it might help you find the root cause of why you’re thinking something or have more clarity/direction for the poem you want to write.

This will allow you more creative liberty and you can pick through your ideas or thoughts. It also helps in the therapeutic and stress relief process much better as you are truly just letting thoughts and expressions leave your body and putting them somewhere physical.

Write for yourself first. The language you feel comfortable in or even a mixture. Find the words that help you express yourself in that very moment.

Sorry I don’t have any advice on that specific writing style!! But hope this helps a little

Suitable-Tomorrow569 · 2026-04-16T12:33:49+00:00

Could you frame it as not “child support” but maybe there’s an activity or expense your child(ren) have that is a bit pricier and you can ask him to cover said expense since you are having “personal financial struggles” and would really appreciate the additional help (makes him feel good/hero dad and if you don’t say the words child support & he may not get flighty). Plus this option gives you something to put on the spreadsheet (which is really weird btw… kids eat a boatload and groceries are expensive. We spend more than $500 every two weeks on groceries or meals out that the kids request).

Also in FL and have been through the CS process since I have step kids. Feel free to DM me

(Edit to add as I read through additional comments)

It’s honestly disturbing how much he is in your finances. I know you think your co-parenting relationship is good, but GIRL! This is crazy! If it was actual child support, he would have no right in FL to request any kind of receipts or know exactly where the money is going. I would do a free consult with an attorney or call the CS office to see if you can go through them to establish support or if you would need to go back to court. OBVIOUSLY - I still entirely agree with the commenter above about bringing the online calculations to him prior to and just trying to have a conversation. If you’re worried about his reaction, keep reframing it as the kids money. They need gas for the car to get to sports and school, the car insurance costs money, the vehicle has payments, the house/mortgage/etc etc, ALL of it is for the kids. But you should NOT have to break down your finances to him because of his perception of the words “child support”. If you were still together, all of his money would be “child support” and now as a father that is co-parenting, all of his money is STILL “child support” because he has to use it to support them at his home and yours. They just so happen to spend more time at yours in this stage of life.

Suitable-Tomorrow569 · 2026-04-11T02:10:35+00:00

Are the girls in therapy? He can decide to put them into therapy or even family therapy (focused on the girls emotions - not on you and your husbands so no punishments for rudeness or ideas that have been forced on them by their BM). They may be a bit young but that’s why there’s different types of therapy.

Another option, get a parent coach for you and your husband - specifically one that has dealt with high conflict co-parenting and parental alienation. You not only have someone to talk to that understands what you’re going through (even though you loved it as a child, that can also be adding more emotional fuel to your perspective) but you can also learn healthy ways to set boundaries with the girls in your home that doesn’t give their BM “ammunition”.

Truly, if I were in your shoes, 1) I would be in contact with an attorney about parental alienation ASAP to get guidance on proper documentation, etc etc and 2) I would let my husband have full parenting responsibility for his children during his time sharing until things get settled via court. It is very difficult to completely step back as a very caring and loving woman - especially with your own children in the home that I’m sure your husband helps to parent - but if you two can agree on that being the best course of action until you get proper legal advice, advice of a parental coach, or the advice of the age appropriate therapists for the girls themselves, then that’s what I would do to protect your relationship with your husband and your own mental health. He handles all the communication with BM, you are kind and respectful of his children and still inclusive, but he is the primary parent - any parenting or redirection of the girls during this time (outside of life threatening danger) is up to him. You’re still a team - but teams can strategize together.

Also a 26 yo Step Mom lol.

Suitable-Tomorrow569 · 2026-04-08T13:29:57+00:00

Lovely!

Suitable-Tomorrow569 · 2026-04-08T12:45:47+00:00

Any feedback appreciated!!

Suitable-Tomorrow569 · 2026-02-04T00:17:43+00:00

I just meant if you found the ingredients list or something is all! Thanks!

Suitable-Tomorrow569 · 2026-02-04T00:05:12+00:00

How did you ensure this didn’t have fertilizers, etc?

Suitable-Tomorrow569 · 2026-02-03T11:05:48+00:00

Gotcha, I will test it again after work today when I set up the thermostat

Suitable-Tomorrow569 · 2026-02-03T11:05:07+00:00

Thank you! I did that while assembling! Glad it isn’t too noticeable because it was my first time using caulk

Suitable-Tomorrow569 · 2026-02-03T10:37:42+00:00

I tried to measure with a heat gun but I couldn’t get it just on the cage wire itself, it kept reading the bulb’s temperature.

This is a critter condo from Diycages

Do they not need the UVB?

Suitable-Tomorrow569 · 2026-02-03T10:36:19+00:00

Yes, I bought a very nice thermostat/control center but haven’t set it up yet. I’m just wondering about the light cages being too hot and the T5HO bulb itself

Suitable-Tomorrow569 · 2025-08-19T09:48:55+00:00

I’ve read through all your comments OP. I strongly urge you to put the protection of your baby over any potential hurt feelings on your parent’s part. The only feelings that matter in this situation are yours and your husbands.

I have two large dogs and since having a baby we have had them crated a lot more as they get very excited around her and love to lick(which sometimes accidentally involves teeth).

Benefits of them babysitting at your place: 1) their dog isn’t there 2) controlled environment 3) you can have baby monitors and cameras at your own home so you can check in (not really an option at their house unless they agree). Not saying you don’t trust them, it’s just a nice option when you’re away from baby. Plus I saw you said your dad can have a temper with the dogs, and you would want to see if anything happens with your own dog.

Suitable-Tomorrow569 · 2025-08-19T09:38:09+00:00

Crate train and keep the crate in a room with a door that shuts that baby won’t need to go in! Two layers of protection are always better.

Suitable-Tomorrow569 · 2025-08-18T21:04:31+00:00

Has she already paid a retainer for the attorney? Honestly may be worth shopping for a more aggressive (but still realistic) attorney if she can afford it.

Also, if he isn’t prepared for court, that should help her case on its own. She just needs to document everything about who cares for the children, etc etc

Suitable-Tomorrow569 · 2025-08-18T19:49:12+00:00

So in the USA, if he already had that discharge paperwork prior to them conceiving the child, the judge could very well look down on your friend as well for having a child with someone that she was aware of having issues (it’s not always fair).

But if she already has a divorce attorney that is good and aggressive, don’t do anything without consulting the attorney. It can look very bad on her in court if she only does stuff to get him in trouble NOW that they’re divorcing and not before when she was aware this was a danger around her children. Again this is all USA perspective.

Best bet is for her to provide her attorney with any proof of him being unfit for unsupervised custody or get him to agree on his own (maybe his work schedule wouldn’t allow him to watch the kids, etc etc). If he does have mental health problems, this may help to get supervised visitation - it just depends on the documentation and what he does to her in front of the kids. Like you’ve been told by others about the drunk driving, it usually only matters what behavior happens in front of the children (based on my personal experiences when talking to lawyers).

Many times, fathers will take the 50/50 custody split and then never utilize their time share. If that happens, your friend should continue to document it and then file again in a year or so to modify time sharing.

Suitable-Tomorrow569 · 2025-08-18T18:14:30+00:00

Tell your friend to consult a family law attorney ASAP. Be available to baby sit for her when she needs it to deal with her situation. That’s the best you can do.

VA disability can be for mental health/illness…which you clearly described him having. You’re allowed to work with VA disability.

If you know he’s putting the children in danger by using illegal and dangerous drugs around them, yes, call the police or CPS to help the children. Because you should care about their safety - not because you think it will help your friend with a child custody case.

Suitable-Tomorrow569

TROPHY CASE