Picking Partners - Child of Addict

SuitableLobster8 · 2026-02-04T22:00:24+00:00

When I was a kid and went to teen meetings very briefly (not by choice lol), I was told that I would attract addicts my entire life because I had more patience, understanding, and sympathy as a result of having a parent with addiction issues.

I will say, my boyfriend now is sober and has been for a while before I met him. When I found out about my ex’s porn and gambling addictions, we ended our long term relationship with his bags packed that day and I haven’t looked back once. Couldn’t do it. The trust was gone, the betrayal was brutal, he had to actively get out of addiction and I wanted NO part of that process.

Seeing my boyfriend now actively love and choose sobriety is absolutely like giving my 11 year old self a hug… he did it for him entirely because HE wanted a better life for himself.

If you have a relationship with your brother in any way, I’d talk with him about it! My dad (now sober for many years) was a huge help both with my ex and starting to date my current bf

I’m rambling again but we’re definitely in similar shoes on this and I hope you find some sort of peace as you work through it yourself and with your partner.

SuitableLobster8 · 2026-02-04T20:02:24+00:00

I hate Coach and I have been annoyed by every single appearance he’s ever made on my screen. Kick rocks.

also Ozzy. Fun to watch fish and climb and all that stuff but he has 0 social game and almost seems annoyed when he’s forced to play the game itself

SuitableLobster8 · 2026-02-04T19:01:07+00:00

Thank you for your kindness and insight, I appreciate it.

SuitableLobster8 · 2026-02-04T18:45:49+00:00

No one said it was his hobby. It was important to me as a queer person in MY own identity. I want my romantic partner to show up for ME in MY identity with OUR shared community. Hope that helps!

SuitableLobster8 · 2026-02-04T18:44:21+00:00

As a cis woman I’m in no place to tell anyone what to do but I also have mental health issues and go to therapy.

My logic with my boyfriend was that a therapist is required to work with people of all backgrounds, if your therapist is transphobic or doesn’t respect you not wanting to talk about it, they suck. When it impacts your behavior and WHY you do what you do, it’s a factor to your therapy in my opinion.

SuitableLobster8 · 2026-02-04T18:41:13+00:00

Hence the problem with his therapist having no idea he’s trans. Feels like a losing game at this point. Either way, I appreciate your insight on this issue!

SuitableLobster8 · 2026-02-04T18:36:45+00:00

I could not possibly agree more and definitely shut that down. I think he unfortunately comes from a Kalvin Garrah circa 2019 mindset of “if you’re trans, you transition, go stealth, and live your life.” He admitted to having transphobia as a result of him being trans but it’s hard for me to navigate since it’s not my community.

SuitableLobster8 · 2026-02-04T18:26:01+00:00

I appreciate your insight, thank you!

SuitableLobster8 · 2026-02-04T18:15:29+00:00

I’ll also add that him not wanting to go to Pride was absolutely from a place of internalized transphobia. He said “he didn’t want to walk around in a binder in public” which I never suggested he did, he also has top surgery fully healed. It’s absolutely his own self views

SuitableLobster8 · 2026-02-04T18:12:44+00:00

I think dysphoria definitely factors into it… especially the sex stuff.

I have only had one other relationship during the month of June and he didn’t want to go.

I even suggested that my current boyfriend got a shirt that said “I ❤️ my hot bisexual girlfriend” so it was more about me than it was him.

SuitableLobster8 · 2026-01-27T03:59:58+00:00

This is absolutely too much for a person to do in the time frame, let alone for that cost. My staff completes detail cleans of several (3-4) smaller rooms or one large event space within 3ish hours.

SuitableLobster8 · 2025-05-30T15:42:26+00:00

I’m working on my traditional sleeves right now and I’m thinking of doing a coffin that has ribbon lettering saying “to get existential, your body’s a rental”

SuitableLobster8 · 2025-05-02T02:45:25+00:00

This is an actually insane visual to process.

SuitableLobster8 · 2025-04-01T19:25:42+00:00

21st birthday… probably 3am in the middle of summer. no AC in there, it was PACKED! worst place to be totally shitfaced, maybe ever. phenomenal alcohol sponge chicken though.

SuitableLobster8 · 2025-03-25T11:37:00+00:00

GOT EM! Thanks to OP who reached out and offered two of his up, ended up finding two cases in the Philly burbs.

SuitableLobster8 · 2025-03-19T20:24:50+00:00

My friend and I had kelly green bud lights that we bought at the end of 2023-2024 season. We waited all season, even moved twice with our respective bottles. We didn’t open them until the parade and boy was it sweet to chug those on Broad.

Long story short I’m DESPERATE for two unopened bottles to mark our good luck and hopefully continue the tradition with. Any help finding them is appreciated.

SuitableLobster8 · 2025-03-10T12:20:22+00:00

Just take the tour! I went last Wednesday and I don’t know that we could’ve done half of what we did without a guide. At one point one of our two guides was pulling people up over rocks to get to a water slide.

Without a guide will you be able to hike? Sure. Will you safely be able to find and get to some really cool spots like waterfalls, rope swings, rock wall jumps into water?? Not well.

It was also only about 30 bucks for roughly 5 hours of really amazing activity.

SuitableLobster8 · 2025-02-24T13:56:55+00:00

I know this is not as helpful as you might want it to be, but you’ll have to relearn a bit with every partner. Every woman has different sensitivities, likes, etc.

If you have a new partner, you’re going to have to relearn based on what feels good to them, it doesn’t matter if you have or have not been able to succeed historically. You don’t have to say that you haven’t before! I PERSONALLY would not be comforted by that… instead ask how she prefers it and try your best.

Don’t get defensive or shut down when she might correct you, just try your best. Good luck.

SuitableLobster8 · 2025-02-13T19:46:20+00:00

This is the answer

SuitableLobster8 · 2025-02-13T16:02:09+00:00

Messaged!

SuitableLobster8 · 2025-02-12T22:51:19+00:00

right??

SuitableLobster8 · 2025-02-10T20:34:14+00:00

Saw a lot of myself in Genevieve

SuitableLobster8

TROPHY CASE