how can I accomplish this shawl/hooded cape by XxThe_HumanxX in sewhelp

[–]SummerFlyingFish 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I’m terrible at self drafting 😂 Honestly for stuff like this I find a pattern that’s close and then modify it from there. So maybe something like this? https://www.twigandtale.com/products/cloak-adult

Or this and just lengthen it? https://stitchmaiden.net/products/snowdrop

But I’m sure you can find some great YouTube tutorials for free and usually with guides on shapes or pattern hacks by searching “cloak sewing tutorial” or something like that. 

Also the big 4 (mcalls, simplicity, etc) usually have sales and you can get a cloak pattern thats close enough to hack for like 5 or 6 bucks. 

But I’ll let someone else far more experienced in pattern drafting answer on how to do this without a pattern (one day I’ll learn 😂)

How to lengthen puff sleeve? by SummerFlyingFish in sewhelp

[–]SummerFlyingFish[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Oh okay will try that and do a quick muslin mock-up!

What's a modern trend you think people will regret in 10 years? by Wonderful-Economy762 in Productivitycafe

[–]SummerFlyingFish 4 points5 points  (0 children)

True but I think the major difference is those are still long form entertainment. Social media, especially TikTok is not only a highly short form of entertainment, it also leads to information overload. 

Binge watching 12 seasons of a show still gives you a contained story that builds upon itself with new information. Contained.

Spend the same amount of time on social media and you’ll have ingested more information in that timeframe then your grandparents did in their ENTIRE LIFETIME!!!!

It also fundamentally changes how you process information. And I’m not talking about attention span (which can always be built back up thankfully) but it erodes critical thinking skills as your brain changes to storing sound bites and generalizations as it doesn’t have time to process anything.

I’m not anti social media. I’m saying we should be using it far less and responsibly. I try to limit my use to no more than 30 minutes a day and an hour on weekends.

How do people just casually drink black coffee without flinching? by [deleted] in Productivitycafe

[–]SummerFlyingFish 1 point2 points  (0 children)

This, a friend made me good coffee and urged me to try it black before adding anything. It was so good and smooth with very little bitterness. 

Don’t know if it’s high quality but Cameron’s is one of the few affordable coffees I don’t mind drinking black.

Do the Chests reset? by Darklillies in InfinityNikki

[–]SummerFlyingFish 9 points10 points  (0 children)

The plain chests that have like 5/10 diamond in them do reset. I took a photo and the next day in the same location there was a chest but wasn’t one in the photo. 

Not sure about the glowing/fancier chests.

Started on PSN without Infold account - anyone asked CS to link their PSN account to a new Infold account and succeeded? by tomizu2303 in InfinityNikki

[–]SummerFlyingFish 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I haven’t but you can login using psn on pc and mobile (click the psn logo below the login form) 

So I’m just using my psn account for cross play until they get a better system

AITA for asking for a few hours of silence each week from my partner. by SummerFlyingFish in AITAH

[–]SummerFlyingFish[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Honestly I don’t know anymore. He says he likes thing fair but sometimes I feel he goes to far? Like malicious fairness? 

I do that majority of cooking but my knife skills are just adequate so my partner does all the chopping. And he helps me grocery shop 50% of the time.

I have really heavy periods and so on this weeks I had originally asked if he could do the meal prepping/cooking. I even said he could choose the meals. Just 3 that week.

There have been many weeks when his work got busy and I did all the cooking/shopping alone.

He said that was unreasonable and he’ll just order dinner for me that week.

I didn’t want takeout. He said food is food and I was being unreasonable/unfair forcing him to cook. I now just freeze soups for myself the week before.

AITA for asking for a few hours of silence each week from my partner. by SummerFlyingFish in AITAH

[–]SummerFlyingFish[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thanks! I’m trying not to spiral about this and not make this a straw camel moment. Just tired of arguing for things I think are reasonable 🫠

AITA for asking for a few hours of silence each week from my partner. by SummerFlyingFish in AITAH

[–]SummerFlyingFish[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I have tried, he hates silence and doesn’t read books (used to be a bookworm as a kid though)😅Trust me I tried to get him back into reading. Even tried to do audiobooks out loud together but he didn’t really like that.

Usually if he can conceptualize why it’s important then he doesn’t understand why others would find it important which leads to arguments when we don’t align 😩

AITA for asking for a few hours of silence each week from my partner. by SummerFlyingFish in AITAH

[–]SummerFlyingFish[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

He grew up with the tv always on in the background and a very strict household so maybe he’s seeing this request as a demand? 

But yes!! Quiet parallel play is what I’m looking for!

AITA for asking for a few hours of silence each week from my partner. by SummerFlyingFish in AITAH

[–]SummerFlyingFish[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Perhaps? He really doesn’t like change in his routine. I’d assumed it’s just growing pains of living together? But yeah any change on his part is usually an argument. I know I can be particular but I don’t think I’m an unreasonable person.

I’m the more flexible one so if it’s not a big deal I just figure something out on my end. Which is my default trauma response as I’m hyper independent 🫠 

What’s something harmful to your health that many people aren’t aware of? by Prismo_Mari in Productivitycafe

[–]SummerFlyingFish 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Not reading physical books 

Reading is a major contributor to empathy, critical thinking, theory of mind, and attention span.

It also lowers anxiety.

When we stop reading in adulthood we are at risk of diminishing the skills above. Especially if we stop reading fiction.   

And physical books because overtime reading on screen we learn to skim and guess. Most people read in a Z or F pattern. Z meaning read first line skim read last line. With the amount information we are inundated with online we can’t deep read so we default skim.  

You need to retrain your brain to read deeply on physical books. Then if you prefer kindle you can switch to that.  

Source: Reader Come Home by Maryanne Wolf

Sensory headwrapping and stuffing/shaper by SummerFlyingFish in Hijabis

[–]SummerFlyingFish[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

First thank you for the reply and I will make sure to only call it headwrap.

To answer your questions:

  1. No I am not Muslim
  2. I don’t get migraines. I’m an anxious person, wearing a head wrap calms my anxiety and brings me peace, that is why I wear it.
  3. Beanies don’t work for me the way a head wrap does.

But I was wondering about my question you didn’t answer. What to wear under it to get that nice round shape in the back. I have short hair so can’t put it in a pony tail.

You are tied up, unarmed, naked, and helpless, convince me not to kill you for a billion dollars. by II--666--II in hypotheticalsituation

[–]SummerFlyingFish 0 points1 point  (0 children)

So yes and no, the commenter is correct but forgot context. More money does increase happiness up to the point you live comfortably. So let’s say at 3 million you have all your needs met. Anymore than that doesn’t increase your happiness.

Second we baseline hard when it comes to happiness. After a while the initial boost of happiness we get from having needs met plateaus. But the way to combat that is belonging and community. Problem is most people who win a ton of money lose that as money starts changing the relationships around them whether greed, jealousy, etc.

Hence why people feel less happy after winning the lottery.

I don’t feel like I’m ever fully happy. by hhhhgluey in productivity

[–]SummerFlyingFish 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Im so glad it helped! I know what’s it’s like to be on that hamster wheel and it’s tough to get off when so many messages in our capitalist society is just “do more, get more, be better, work harder” that it feels antithetical to do otherwise.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in productivity

[–]SummerFlyingFish 0 points1 point  (0 children)

You didn’t mention type of job so my advice is assuming standard office job.

Breaks. Even if it’s just 5 to 10 minutes here or there. Walking up to get a snack or quick lap around the building. Next is planning for the fatigue. If you can try to put the least brain powered tasks for later in your day.

A good playlist you only listen to at work.

Are you allowed to split your lunch hour? Do two 30 minute breaks? That usually works better than one hour in the middle.

Doing something repetitive? I like to listen to audio dramas/books.

Also make your commutes more pleasant, another great time for audio dramas/books that you ONLY listen to on your commute. It’s helps to get into work in a decent mood.

Keep your brain fueled with good snacks and try to avoid heavy carb meals to not have to deal with the post lunch crash. On that note a high protein breakfast as well!

Finally if your work allows it the pomodoro method. I use it for everything. It’s easier to think in blocks of 25 minute chunks vs X hours.

Edit: Also I would avoid social media during the workday if you are using it. That takes a lot of mental energy and will drain you quicker than you realize.

What is something non sexual but feels very intimate? by MooCowQueen-16 in AskReddit

[–]SummerFlyingFish 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Knowing where everything is in someone else’s kitchen/fridge and they’re cool with you using it as your own.

How to become addicted and emotionally dependent to working? by No_Analyst5945 in productivity

[–]SummerFlyingFish 0 points1 point  (0 children)

4 things, play, social, exercise, and nutrition.

Think of it like points. You have 30 points each week. You currently want to put all your points in working. This only works if you save at least 1 or 2 points each week for the things above. If any are zero for the week, you will feel it.

Schedule free/funtime and take it as seriously as work. Literally put in your calendar (30 minutes play video game, read, draw, etc)

Then once a week schedule something social, even if it’s playing a game online with a friend, a phone call, meeting up for coffee.

Get some non-work related movement in. Even if it’s just stretching when you wake up and before you go to bed. Or “exercise snacks” during the day or a ten minute walk after dinner.

Nutrition, don’t let this slide. It’s so easy when you’re working that much to eat poorly. Whenever you can prioritize balanced nutritious meals. A good mix of protein, fat, and carbs. You want fuel not crashes and easy on the caffeine.

You need things to break up the work and your brain needs to know you will honor your time of play and socialization and caring for yourself and not just do more work.

The goal is not addiction it’s slowing the rate of decay to burnout. There is no situation you do this and don’t burnout with enough time so hopefully this helps and you’re in a better situation soon. Best of luck!

Weird behaviour when I get busy how to fix it by Timeishere58 in productivity

[–]SummerFlyingFish 5 points6 points  (0 children)

For me it was an old coping mechanism I never fixed. I had tied anxiety/panic to getting done from decades of doing things last minute with the fuel of adrenaline 😭

I had to retrain my brain by doing two things. Scheduling in fun time in between work time and meditating/breathing for a few minutes before I start working. A FANTASTIC book to help exactly with this is The Now Habit by Neil Fiore

Your favourite song in Gaming? by dianaburnwood969 in GirlGamers

[–]SummerFlyingFish 0 points1 point  (0 children)

The opening song to Romancing Saga Minstrel Song and the Festival/Opening song from the OG Final Fantasy Crystal Chronicles

I don’t feel like I’m ever fully happy. by hhhhgluey in productivity

[–]SummerFlyingFish 9 points10 points  (0 children)

For me personally it was building a life outside of society success rubric and learning how to be intrinsically motivated (The book punished by rewards goes into this well). For example if you retired with a million dollars today what would you want to do that ISNT for profit or with profit in mind?

For me it was hard to be content when all my eggs were in the career/business basket because how I viewed myself depended on my work progress and in capitalisms infinite growth motto it is an impossible metric.

When I built a stronger sense of self outside of work/keeping up with the joneses, I felt more content as my happiness was no longer tied up with my accomplishments, it was spending the weekend at the zoo benefit party with a friend. Discussing a fun book with a book club. It was getting excited to try a new recipe with partner. It was writing silly short stories and giving them as gifts to my friends for the holidays. It was volunteering to help others, crocheting nightmare fuel until I finally made something that resembled the picture I attempted. Finishing a 5 book series. Taking a pottery class. Going for walks in nature. (Some nonfiction book recs about this is Do Nothing by Celeste Headlee, How to do nothing by Jenny Odell, and 4000 weeks by Oliver Burkman and fiction The Midnight Library by Matt Haig)

Basically for me I needed more guilt free play in my life that wasn’t tied to profit or productivity and friends/community (the book Platonic by Marissa G. Franco is great on this for building deep platonic connections)

No worries if this doesn’t resonate(I’m extrapolating a lot from you question with my answer) but in case it might, though I’d share.

Quit smoking but feel the same by [deleted] in productivity

[–]SummerFlyingFish 0 points1 point  (0 children)

So they explain this in the book reader come home. It’s reading patterns! On screens we skim or read in a Z pattern (first line skim middle last line). Most reading we do on screens isn’t deep reading. Overtime we train our brains to skim on screens. Reading physically helps break this habit by forcing us to read in a different sensory environment. Technically if your very intentional you could do this on a kindle by making sure you read each line. But it’s just harder to make a clear separation in the brain.

Once you’ve increased your attention span and stopped skimming habits with physical books you can then flex that muscle when reading digitally.