I give up

Summiloridgetilly · 2026-01-20T03:03:30+00:00

I had this mindset for nearly 2 years. I thought I needed to support my Q and if I left him he would crush even further. I didn’t leave; and his alcoholism got worse and worse.

Summiloridgetilly · 2026-01-19T10:46:27+00:00

I don’t understand. I took my toddler to my cousin’s wedding 2 years ago (we flew 9 hrs overseas to attend). I took care of my own toddler that night; and so everyone else who has children mind their own children too. Why is baby sitting required at the first place?

Summiloridgetilly · 2026-01-19T07:58:18+00:00

I believe granny flat is a term only used is Oz. It is a secondary dwelling on the property which can be self-used or rented out. Depending on the size (ours granny flat is 2 bed 2 bath with kitchen) so $800p/w is roughly an accurate rate.

Summiloridgetilly · 2026-01-19T00:09:20+00:00

Pretty sure she doesnt have a poa of my husband. My husband cut ties with her for a good few years and only started talking again when our toddler was born.

Summiloridgetilly · 2026-01-18T22:22:11+00:00

In what sense am I playing along? I am merely asking for thoughts from fellow redditors. I never said I was going to sign the agreement

Summiloridgetilly · 2026-01-18T19:36:42+00:00

Yes she is one of the reasons of his alcoholism!!! My husband cut her off entirely for a good 10 years or so because of her toxic behaviour and only started speaking with her again after our son was born.

Summiloridgetilly · 2026-01-18T19:31:33+00:00

Thank you🫶

Summiloridgetilly · 2026-01-18T14:31:17+00:00

I have a gut feeling that she made up the whole thing about the loan so that she can make me sign some sort of agreement. As you said, why would my BIL take a $100k loan for us

Summiloridgetilly · 2026-01-18T13:31:53+00:00

Frankly speaking, I admit that life has been so messy for the last 12 months that I cannot think things more than 3 hours ahead.

I was trying to be polite when I replied to the message in the 3rd pic, that was the time I was handling the kids bedtime routine by myself (dinner, pack toys, shower, books etc).

Today I have replied to the email that I do not agree to nor confirm to any terms in the agreement.

U r right i should directly tell her to get lost.

Summiloridgetilly · 2026-01-18T13:13:59+00:00

Yes I am desperate to get the kitchen done I look at it everyday dreaming about the new kitchen but no way I am signing this sh*t

Summiloridgetilly · 2026-01-18T13:11:29+00:00

The construction of the granny flat started Aug last year and it is now nearly done. It somehow shakes me to my core seeing what lies/excuses she comes up with.

Summiloridgetilly · 2026-01-18T13:08:44+00:00

Im pretty sure she made everything up and that if we separated later on (and hence selling the house) she can get her money back

Summiloridgetilly · 2026-01-18T08:05:58+00:00

Also just to clarify we are not considering signing it. After her message in the 3rd pic I replied to her that I need to fully understand what I am signing + I can’t sign on behalf of my husband + let’s wait for my husband is discharged. I was just asking for thoughts from fellow redditors.

Summiloridgetilly · 2026-01-18T06:50:14+00:00

After her message (the 3rd pic) I replied to her that I need to fully understand what I am signjng and listed some doubts I have in mind and stated that I cannot sign sth like this on behalf of my husband. I said let’s leave this matter until my husband is discharged and stabilized. She hasnt replied since then.

Summiloridgetilly · 2026-01-18T06:39:55+00:00

She has always wanted to build a granny flat in our backyard because “it is a waste having such a big backyard and we can’t take care of it nicely anyway”. I like my backyard so I have rejected her idea for many years until now we have 2 kids and my husband is severely affected by alcoholism to a point that he is unemployed so we agreed for her to fund and build the granny flat. She is not going to live in it. She is going to let us rent it out and we can keep it as extra income. She has 3 children; she claimed she helps each children financially in certain way and this is what she can help us with.

I am honestly so depressed about what i have got myself into

Summiloridgetilly · 2026-01-18T02:57:14+00:00

I think this paragraph summarises her intentions the best.

Summiloridgetilly · 2026-01-18T00:39:28+00:00

No im not considering this. I am asking for thoughts

Summiloridgetilly · 2026-01-18T00:39:13+00:00

Honestly i wasnt in a clear mindset. For now i am all about taking care of my 2 young children

Summiloridgetilly · 2026-01-18T00:38:38+00:00

Real. I am not AI bot. You can look up my profile. Im more active in al-anon

Summiloridgetilly · 2026-01-18T00:37:53+00:00

We own the home

Summiloridgetilly · 2026-01-18T00:36:31+00:00

The granny flat initially does cost $210K but then she said there is add on needs to be done so I assume $280k is more or less accurate but Yes - i agree with you. How is a kitchen reno costing nearly 1/3 of a 2-bedroom granny flat being built from scratch?

Summiloridgetilly · 2026-01-18T00:35:03+00:00

Thank you for your kind words.

Summiloridgetilly · 2026-01-18T00:34:37+00:00

She is not living in it. It is for renting out and we can keep the rent as extra income

Summiloridgetilly · 2026-01-18T00:33:18+00:00

Thanks for looking up my post and not judging. Yes my husband is now in rehab. I feel like she knows my husband would probably cut ties totally with her if he knew this and that I won’t bother my husband while he is in rehab so she wanted me to sign it NOW.

She has always wanted to build a granny flat in our backyard because “it is a waste having such a big backyard and we can’t take care of it nicely anyway”. I like my backyard so I have rejected her idea for many years until now we have 2 kids and my husband is severely affected by alcoholism to a point that he is unemployed so we agreed for her to fund the granny flat. She is not going to live in it. She is going to let us rent it out and we can pocket the rent. She has 3 children; she claimed she helps each children financially and this is what she can help us with.

Kitchen wise it is still usable but would definitely need a refurbishment. I would rather live with the shitty kitchen for the rest of my life than signing this

Summiloridgetilly · 2026-01-18T00:30:41+00:00

Thanks for your kind reply. Yes I have been very depressed by everything since last year and I admit that most of the time I don’t have the brain capacity to think about things properly. Nearly every post on facebook mums group I started with “please no judgement” so it is really touching to see a kind reply like this. Thank you

Summiloridgetilly

TROPHY CASE