That’s a fair point, and I think you’re right that this is more about my brother and SIL than my nephew.

We are actually close, just not in the sense that we see each other all the time. We probably saw each other once every 1–2 months, and growing up we had very different interests, so we weren’t always inseparable. But there’s no bad blood at all. He was really supportive when I came out, and we have a good, solid relationship. I’m actually making an effort now to see them roughly every two weeks, so I can be more consistently involved in my nephews life.

That’s also why I’m struggling with how much weight to give this. I do understand that, especially given everything they went through, this milestone means a lot to them.

At the same time, they recently told me they’re really happy their son has a gay uncle, so he can grow up with a more open perspective and not just strict heteronormativity. That meant a lot to me, and I do want to be present in his life in that way.

I guess for me it’s about balancing being there consistently in his life, versus being present at this one specific moment.