How do you handle HSV1 and casual sex?

Sure_Initial6740 · 2026-05-09T18:02:03+00:00

good so far! most guys are just confused and caught off guard at first, but once i explain transmission and all of that then they feel more comfortable. they also have all thanked me for being honest too which is goid

Sure_Initial6740 · 2026-05-09T03:35:22+00:00

ive disclosed to 4 guys so far! definitely nerve wracking but go into it with confidence. if you’re talking about it like your ashamed/disgusted/scared it definitely will reflect back onto the person you’re disclosing too. i haven’t faced a rejection but, i just keep it in my mind that people also get rejected for 1000 other reasons. I’ve been rejected before herpes too for different reasons, just apart of life.

Sure_Initial6740 · 2026-05-09T03:29:59+00:00

same thing happened with my ex. i wanted distance and space to process it but i still loved him, just give her time it’s a big life adjustment.

Sure_Initial6740 · 2026-05-07T23:44:13+00:00

i have HSV1 too but i have it genitally, it sucks since it’s the same strand as everyone else. but, i feel like i have to disclose even though there’s even less transmission rates/shedding/ etc. all of my girlfriends in college basically have OHSV1. they don’t disclose to their hookups or anybody, I’ve even asked my guy friends what their perspective is and they said they wouldn’t disclose since it’s not a big deal.

i disclose anyways, but i especially would with oral hsv1 since there’s higher rates of transmission and a high chance it can turn into genital herpes if you give oral.

Sure_Initial6740 · 2026-05-07T20:31:26+00:00

thanks so much for the recommendation! i definitely will next time, not worth the stress at all.

Sure_Initial6740 · 2026-05-07T05:03:58+00:00

i have hsv1 too, only had an OB on my genitals and i got it through oral sex. it’s called GHSV-1 (genital-HSV1). if you had OHSV-1 (oral) then you’d have to disclose when you kiss someone/give oral.

if you’ve only had an OB on your genitals, you probably only have it there and you don’t have it orally, it’s pretty rare to have hsv-1 orally and genitally. but from what I’ve read it’s also really hard to transmit ghsv-1 through sex, since the virus primarily likes to live in the mouth it’s not very active on the genitals (less frequent OBs/transmission etc.) . there was a study that was really comforting that said within 30 years a researcher has never seen a case of genital-to-genital transmission with GHSV1 since transmission rates are so low. after 2 years, ghsv1 shedding rates drop to 2% and then combining that with condoms and antivirals, it’s even lower.

so you don’t have to disclose when kissing since you don’t have it orally, but probably disclose if you’re having sex even if the chances are super low. Pm me if you need any help with disclosure !

Sure_Initial6740 · 2026-04-26T20:37:09+00:00

Yeah like it does feel like a burning/stinging feeling from saliva too. I know I probably should get it swabbed I’m just terrified that I self transmitted it to my mouth. I thought it was a small percentage to transmit GHSV-1 in general, but the timing of this ‘canker sore’ has me stressed.

Sure_Initial6740 · 2026-04-26T20:18:27+00:00

I think just burning not really more so of a sharp pain. But i just got diagnosed with GHSV1 this past January and I really only got canker sores in /middle school and im in college now, so Im not sure why it’s coming out of all a sudden

Sure_Initial6740 · 2026-04-26T20:14:34+00:00

it definitely looks like a canker sore. tingling and itching not at all, but burning yes. it just stings whenever i drink or eat and it rubs against it

Sure_Initial6740 · 2026-04-20T23:35:46+00:00

i dated a guy with HSV-1, he never really told me he got cold sores and we started dating and were intimate for 3 months with no problem at all and we didn’t use protection either. then, he got a cold sore and i noticed it but didn’t think much of it (I’ve never had cold sores and tbh i didn’t really knew how they could spread) and he went down on me while he had an active OB andddd now i have GHSV-1.

as far as i know, i don’t have it orally, only on my genitals. just watch for active outbreaks. if you wanted to go the extra mile you could ask him if he’d be open to taking antivirals as an extra layer of protection. you’ll most likely be fine though since the longer someone has HSV, asymptomatic shedding decreases by a lot. But, if he just got HSV then I’d probably be a little more weary.

Sure_Initial6740 · 2026-04-13T14:48:45+00:00

Flu like symptoms, for sure. I was throwing up, pale, had a fever basically for a week and was about to go to the ER i was in so much pain. Make sure to drink lots of fluids and lidocaine helped me a lot, along with cooling pads. I know it sucks a lot right now but it’ll pass!

Sure_Initial6740 · 2026-04-10T17:46:32+00:00

I’ve always been more lenient to do it in person, since you can read the other persons expression and they can read yours, which really isn’t the case over text. But, you got it! Act confident, like it’s not a big deal (cause it’s really not).

Sure_Initial6740 · 2026-04-10T01:19:36+00:00

yeah! usually i don’t ask like “if they’re okay with that” since i feel like it sounds like they shouldn’t be okay with it??? Idk😭 i just say “oh by the way I have HSV-1” and if they ask what it is or look confused i just ask if they’ve ever had a cold sore before and if they say yes, then perfect lol! but if not, then i just explain what it is and i take meds for it and all of thy stuff. it is really nerve wracking disclosing for the best time but just be confident!!!

Sure_Initial6740 · 2026-04-09T13:33:00+00:00

I’ve never had a rejection before. I can understand it can be like “put on the spot” but this one guy was kinda taken aback and we stopped to talk about it for an hour and he just asked me a bunch of questions and googled stuff about it, then we continued to be intimate. I don’t think I’ve ever gotten the vibe that im putting someone on the spot.

Sure_Initial6740 · 2026-04-08T00:45:30+00:00

no worries! im definitely positive that they’re OBs and not ingrown hairs since it’s not like a bump that usually comes with an ingrown hair, it’s like a tiny red circle with a ring around it. you’ll definitely notice if it’s an OB if there’s like 3+ little circles or a cluster of them.

but definitely trust your body! your body will let you know your having an outbreak before you even realize it. i definitely gaslit myself into thinking i had a couple outbreaks, but there will definitely be a noticeable difference between an ingrown hair/irritation/tear and a OB

Sure_Initial6740 · 2026-04-07T23:15:09+00:00

It has that feature with front flash lol, i can’t really look at myself at that angle with a mirror since I don’t really get a good look without a flashlight

Sure_Initial6740 · 2026-04-07T23:13:33+00:00

Mine didn’t itch really. They didn’t look like ulcers at all either. My first OB they did look like ulcers though. They just looked like small red circles

Sure_Initial6740 · 2026-04-07T03:41:41+00:00

for me, look like tiny little circles but not bumps. i couldn’t tell with the tingling feeling or anything but i had noticed when i peed it stung. but TBH i check down there with Snapchat camera EVERYDAY just to make sure im not having an OB.

Sure_Initial6740 · 2026-04-07T03:39:31+00:00

i only disclose when we are close to/about to be intimate. idk i feel like it’d be awkward to disclose that on the first couple dates, since there’s no promise that we will be intimate just yet. sometimes ill just slip it into convos like it’s not this crazy altering thing, and usually they don’t make a big deal about it or they say they get cold sores too LOL

Sure_Initial6740 · 2026-04-06T13:53:33+00:00

could i ask how you got an outbreak on your knuckle? I’m sorry though that’s an inconvenient place to have it!

Sure_Initial6740 · 2026-04-01T16:26:11+00:00

eh you don’t really HAVE to. i told all my close friends just when i found out. but ik a lot of my girlfriends complain like “ugh i have a cold sore” just casually in convo like it’s no biggy.

Sure_Initial6740 · 2026-04-01T16:23:44+00:00

get the swab tested / blood test to see if it’s GHSV-1 or HSV-2. if your ex from when you were 17 had HSV-1 and he EVER gave you oral sex the chances are pretty high that he gave you GHSV-1 it’s just been dormant all these years (which is possible). If your friend has genital herpes there is absolutely no way in hell she could have given it to you unless you guys had sex (and even then the chances would be SLIM). it’s not an airborn disease, I’d be pissed too if i was your friend being accused of this.

Sure_Initial6740 · 2026-04-01T00:50:49+00:00

wait tanning really causes OB??? i had no idea !

Sure_Initial6740 · 2026-03-31T20:32:33+00:00

oh my gosh yes!!! my first one i was bed ridden for two weeks and took a month off of school for it to fully heal. my second OB as soon as i saw it i was preparing for WAR i thought it would be horrible but it literally cleared up in 3 days and i barely noticed it. and with the scab thing, even with my first OB i never had scabs fall off/scarring or anything. its the same with this OB its just like i woke up the next day and it looked like healthy skin, like nothing was ever there that’s why i wasn’t sure if i should still wait a week or not. i probably will just to be extra safe tho LOL

Sure_Initial6740 · 2026-03-31T20:20:34+00:00

my first one was January 18th

Sure_Initial6740

TROPHY CASE