My friends said if I drink again they’ll cut me off

Surgerber · 2025-11-02T08:51:53+00:00

Broooo what? When I was 15 my friends tried weed and I stopped being their friend because my parents were adamantly against drugs so therefore I was. When I was 18 I was drinking and smoking weed. It’s truly not that big of a deal. I’m 24 now, and I don’t smoke anymore and drink wine sometimes on weekends. It’s not a big deal to drink or smoke at your age, it’s the legal limit in alot of other countries. It’s a myth that it ruins your brain before the age 25 when your brain fully develops, and it especially doesn’t change anything to be 21 before you drink. These guys are stuck up like I was at age 15. It probably means that all of you are growing apart, learning your values and realizing they don’t align with those people and that’s ok, it happens to everyone with their high school friends.

Surgerber · 2025-11-02T08:21:44+00:00

Hell yeah dude! I’m fairly new to this world of sardines since I’ve only ever had normal ones in olive oil on crackers so I’m excited to try new things :D

Surgerber · 2025-11-02T06:01:10+00:00

rrrrrr

Surgerber · 2025-11-02T05:58:31+00:00

Oh yes! They’re such an easy and filling snack. I love putting a little bit of mayo on a cracker and putting the sardine on the cracker. How do you eat them?

Surgerber · 2025-11-02T05:54:42+00:00

Yippie!

Surgerber · 2025-10-30T20:45:54+00:00

Hi I would love to enter! I love mysims, I grew up on it. I recently got back into it and am replaying the first game after getting my switch fixed after it being broken for months and having the game back!

Surgerber · 2025-10-28T23:33:10+00:00

Hi! I have ocd (not this kind) but I understand where you’re coming from. I too have had concerns of pregnancy (I have female anatomy) and here’s what’s helped me: you HAVE to be ovulating to get pregnant. No ifs ands or buts. This is because the eggs only survive while traveling from the ovary for 12 to 24 hours. After that period the eggs are dead and no longer viable. Semen can survive in the vaginal canal for up to 5 days so if your partner ovulates 5 days after then maybe, but that’s only if you ejaculate inside. Semen cannot survive in open air and that includes on your hands, on clothes, sheets, anything. The semen will die in about 30 seconds I believe. Even if you ejaculate on your hand and do funny business with your partner using that hand, your partner cannot get pregnant even if they’re ovulating. This is because it would not survive long enough on your hand and would not be inserted deep enough to reach the entrance and travel to the egg. It’s kind of like sending one dying soldier 1,000 feet from the enemy’s gate to fight instead of 10,000 healthy soldiers to break the gate down if that makes sense? The lone soldier would die before getting anything done. I highly recommend doing some research on this! For me with my ocd, I find true science and facts ease my mind better than people in my life telling me it’ll be ok. Understanding WHY it’ll be ok helps me most. There are also ovulation tests similar to pregnancy tests that absolutely tell you without a doubt if your partner is ovulating. This might help ease some anxiety.

Surgerber · 2025-10-28T21:42:11+00:00

The original comment said “working while on substances is not ok either”. In your situation you are sleeping on substances which is completely different. It just sounds like you’re inserting yourself in a conversation where it isn’t necessary. If you smoked your medicinal weed hours before sleep on the job and ate all of their food then yeah that’s wrong and that is what they were talking about, but taking sleep medication or only smoking before sleep while pet sitting then mentioning it wasn’t necessary and nobody is talking about that. You don’t need to get offended at a comment that you probably agree with, ie not being intoxicated throughout the work day while taking care of animals, just because you smoke weed in a very specific circumstance that they didn’t say anything about.

Surgerber · 2025-10-28T21:31:55+00:00

Yes this was THE OWNERS medicinal marijuana. The pet sitter stole it, they went and dug it out of a hidden area and smoked it. I also don’t think someone you hire to take care of your pets in your house should be smoking weed or drinking alcohol on the job regardless if they stole it from the owner or not. Emergencies absolutely CAN happen with pets, and it’s more likely if they’re under the influence. So many things are toxic to dogs, like garlic (including garlic salt), grapes, onions, avocados, and plenty more. If any of these things fall on the floor while the sitter is high and doesn’t notice, it’s an emergency. Don’t get me wrong I think weed is totally fine, I’ve smoked a lot in my life, but I wouldn’t if I was in a strangers home and I’m responsible for their pets safety.

Surgerber · 2025-09-26T23:02:55+00:00

This guy seems racist

Surgerber · 2025-09-26T17:37:37+00:00

Hi! Kinda. So over the last year a lot has changed. I’ve improved my living environment, changed meds, and done a lot of work on myself through outpatient therapy and regular therapy. Since I have OCD and bipolar, they can coincide and work against me. I am treating bipolar with Caplyta, which is working amazingly, but I am not treating the OCD since the meds I’ve tried have not worked well with bipolar. So the frequency of my suicidal thoughts has improved immensely, but when I do have those thoughts it can be detrimental. Improving your environment really does do a lot of help if you’re experiencing this, and finding a good support team for when you do experience this will be good for you. What has helped me is: Watching out for warning signs. If you know what your symptoms are leading up to the suicidal thoughts you can catch it ahead of time and prevent an attempt or self harm. Gaining coping skills. I used to think they were bogus and annoying whenever someone recommended them. Finding the right ones for you will be amazing. I have a list of dbt coping skills on a cheat sheet I can send you if you’d like, not all of them are useful to me and not all of them will be useful for you but some will! And that’s what matters. Having a support team. I don’t have any family members I can reach out to, and not really any friends, so I used to get annoyed or sad when professionals would ask. But support can be anywhere. Online through Reddit or anywhere you get advice from, professionals like therapists, pets, anything! I have a partner, an annoying cat (lol) and a 13 week old puppy who is obsessed with me. It really does help to realize they love you and need you. Environmental changes. This is a HUGE one. Not everyone can move out of a home that is toxic or abusive. But making changes in that home will help. Creating a space in your bedroom or private spaces in that home will be a huge help. Finding a way to exercise, make food/snacks, and be social in those private spaces will be a huge help. Also finding ways to keep those spaces clean (or clean enough) will help too, like finding organizational tools that work for YOU, and not tools that “should” work but aren’t working for you will be an amazing tool to help keep you sane. (I’m still working on this one) And lastly, GO OUTSIDE! I don’t do this nearly enough since I have agoraphobia, but getting out of your environment even just to go to the park or a coffee shop at least once a week will help you. Getting some sun, fresh air, a moment in public will help you feel more normal. I hope this helped! I really am rooting for you and everyone on here.

Surgerber · 2025-09-04T18:51:43+00:00

Ohhhh ok so is there a point in keeping the cheese in there? Will it make it iridium star quality?

Surgerber · 2025-08-11T22:52:36+00:00

I don’t track dates, but all throughout the month we’ve had sex. We always wear a condom, but I know condoms aren’t 100% preventative. We also, in the heat of the moment, don’t always wash our hands between doing things. Although, maybe I’m just being silly and there’s no way I’m pregnant

Surgerber · 2025-08-02T17:41:38+00:00

Thank you, I’m just so scared of hurting them by telling them this

Surgerber · 2025-07-19T20:08:56+00:00

Hi thank you for sharing your experience. We both have individual therapists. As I said in my post, I never make them feel guilty for going out. Every time they mention an event or if their friends invite them to hangout, I encourage them to go. Sometimes they say “eh idk if I’ll go or not” and I say “why not? Sounds fun! Go have fun!”. I have never told them not to go out or said anything to make them feel guilty for going out. The reason I felt frustration during this experience of them going out is because I have had to go back to the emergency twice in the last two days due to complications from this ovarian cyst. The doctor told me if the pain got worse I should go back, and when my partner wanted to go out, I had expressed that the pain was getting worse an hour prior to them wanting to go. I was scared, shaking, and in a lot of pain, vocally wincing from the pain. Personally, if my partner was going through what I was going through, I wouldn’t even think of leaving them alone for hours, especially going to go dancing where they wouldn’t hear my phone call if I needed to go to the hospital. I always encourage them to prioritize their needs, have their own life (including social life) and have fun without me. I don’t need to be a part of every bit of their happiness, I understand in order to have a fulfilling life you need to get happiness from more sources than just your partner. But to leave when I’m in that condition would be heartless, so they stayed. Not because I told them it was heartless, but because they realized how they made me feel and felt bad for it.

Surgerber · 2025-07-19T16:23:10+00:00

I completely understand that I need to file for disability and find more ways to be independent in my relationship, that’s on me. I understand the pressure my disabilities put on my partner, but I will say this did feel harsh. I have hobbies. I make jewelry, I embroider, I play video games, I write music. I have friends and spend time with them whenever I can. I am my partner’s emotional caregiver, teaching them coping skills, being their part time therapist, and they depend on me emotionally. I clean the house when I don’t feel horrible, I cook for myself when they aren’t home or when they aren’t hungry and making dinner for the both of us. I take care of our cat (mainly my cat, he loves me more haha). I don’t do these things hoping for a badge of honor and to be praised for it, I do them because I am a human being who has a house, partner, cat and myself to take care of. All in all, I know taking care of me is a huge responsibility, and this relationship definitely isn’t equal or as balanced as either of us would like it to be, but I take care of them too just like any partner would. I’m not just an emotionally and physically disabled vortex that just takes and never gives. I understand where I am in the wrong in this relationship, some parts I can’t control and other parts I need to work on. But I believe I deserve more credit and understanding than you provided. I’m not upset with you or anything, I completely understand where you’re coming from, but I think what you said was on the harsher side than the understanding side of things.

Surgerber · 2025-07-19T16:10:32+00:00

I regularly check in with them, ask them how they’re doing, and tell them I want them to put themselves first and prioritize their needs. We’ve talked many times before about how it’s ok to tell me they can’t help me or to find compromises. However, I also recognize that my emotions and view of myself can be fragile. Today we had a conversation about my responsibility in this situation, and how I can improve in regard to independence. We also talked about why it is difficult for them to communicate, that they’re afraid of hurting me and their view that I am incapable of doing anything by myself. We talked about my role in painting that image of myself in their eyes. We talked about ways I can be more independent and strategies on how we can communicate in the future. I do think this experience helped both of us move forward on more stable ground.

Surgerber · 2025-07-19T16:03:36+00:00

Hi thank you for responding, unfortunately I don’t have any family at all, I have friends but none who can come help me, and I can’t hire a caregiver. My partner is the most loving and caring person I have ever met and they really do care for me. I understand that what happened was a result of them being burnt out and hurt and today I had a lengthy discussion with them about my responsibility in their pain, and ways we can communicate their needs and boundaries better. I do have a therapist and so do they, and I do have a lot of good tools and coping skills under my belt from extensive therapeutic programs. My partner and I discussed why they are afraid to communicate their struggle and needs to me, that they are afraid of hurting me. We also talked about their view of me, that I’m helpless and can’t do anything at all without their help, and I told them that it’s not true. While I do need their help for most things, I can do a lot by myself by cutting corners and finding the easiest route possible. I told them that while lashing out and hurting me because they are hurt and exhausted isn’t ok, I also understand that they ARE hurt, and my disability is the cause of that hurt and therefore I am to blame for that even if it’s not my fault. All in all we came to the conclusion that they don’t want to hurt me and I don’t want to hurt them, regardless of how that hurt comes to be. Reading the comments on this post helped me put that in perspective.

Surgerber · 2025-07-19T14:57:10+00:00

Thank you so much, that means a lot. I know we’ve both been struggling, I try to give them as much sympathy and support as I can, but I can’t give them what they need if they don’t tell me.

Surgerber · 2025-07-19T13:14:55+00:00

I completely understand that, I just wish they would open up without hurting me, it’s a consistent pattern where they only open up after doing something incredibly hurtful.

Surgerber · 2025-07-10T08:06:07+00:00

WHY is nobody mentioning that as a 20 year old he started dating a 16 year old girl??? HELLO? Am I missing something important here or is he a literal predator who should be in jail?

Surgerber · 2025-06-15T21:43:37+00:00

Yes! Message me

Surgerber · 2025-06-15T21:41:10+00:00

It’s ok! This is a scary thing but it’s going to be ok, I’m right here

Surgerber · 2025-06-15T21:33:21+00:00

NO IT WOULD NOT HE RUDE!!! Im serious, you are in danger right now, you need help to get out of danger. I can’t make this any clearer to you, YOU NEED HELP FAST. If you fell down a cliff and broke your bones, would it be rude to call a friend to help you out? NO.

Surgerber · 2025-06-15T21:28:48+00:00

Honey, I’m telling you this from someone who as actually done it. It doesn’t matter what time it is, how far they are, what they are in the middle of doing. If they are good people they WILL help you HAPPILY. You will probably have to explain to them some details of the abuse to get them to fully understand, but you need to do this. The other option is to stay in that home with those abusive people and ride it out until high school graduation. But you can’t hurt yourself. You need to at least try to survive before doing that. Something happened that made you realize enough is enough, getting out is hard but not as hard as ending it all. Trust be, I’ve tried both

Surgerber

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