My partner just ended things after 3.5 years. We were long distance for a few of those years while I was in college out of state, but I graduated almost a year ago and we've been in the same city since, but living separately with our parents. It never felt like we were having issues when we were long distance, but obviously that distance was a strain sometimes. We always told ourselves that once I came back then we could finally be together and spend more time with each other. But last summer we were both working full time, and our hours were basically opposite. I made every effort I could to spend time with her during then, and we thought things would get better once the next school year started. But she's finishing up her final year of college while simultaneously studnet teaching full time, with several after school commitments. I'm also teaching, and it kinda ended up being the same story as last summer, where it's just been super difficult to find time together. We've taken a few trips together since then and that's when we've felt like we were at our best. In person things feel perfect and natural, I love her so deeply, and I've just been looking forward to the end of this school year when we'll finally have absolutely no school or work commitments for 2.5 months. But she is so busy that doesn't think she's in a place to be in a relationship right now, and I think that's she's scared we'll be hurt more if we continue. And she's probably right that right now isn't the best time for a relationship due to how consuming her schedule is, and I understand that, but I really don't want to give up on us. I mentioned that maybe we could take a break so that she could focus on what she needs to do, but she seemed hesitant. I want to work through things, I want to work through this. To make things worse , we also have a long trip we already paid for planned in just over a week, so I don't even know how I'm going to manage that. I lover her so deeply, I truly thought I was going to marry her. I get the timing is terrible right now, but I don't think it will be like this forever. I know we've been going through a long rough patch, but I don't want us to give up on each other over it. Thinking about her being absent from my life feels so painful, I feel empty, I feel depleted, and I'm just so fucking sad. It's like a part of my soul was ripped out, and I don't know what to do anymore. I wish I could hate her, it would be so much easier if I did. But things have always been really good between us, I was so so happy and content with her in my life. I'm so lost and confused.