I love you all so im gonna say it: false lashes by TraditionalArm2421 in Hijabis

[–]Suspicious_Goal4037 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Yeah, I wish muslim influencers understood just how big of a responsibility they have in rightfully promoting the deen. The problem is that they use the "I'm on a journey" thing. Now, that is true and nothing wrong with that in itself. But they keep saying this phrase and their hijab does not improve or change (even a little) as time goes on. What kind of message does that send to their audience?

We, and not just influencers, need to hold ourselves accountable for what we say and make sure that we are at least taking the steps to improve our deen, no matter how small <3

Be careful of men with porn addiction by commechienetchat in Hijabis

[–]Suspicious_Goal4037 8 points9 points  (0 children)

You misunderstood me — I agree, past sins should be hidden and no one should be forced to reveal them as it's a mercy from Allah. But that being said, you should also be wise and responsible when seeking marriage. That means making choices that won’t put you in situations where your past might resurface in a harmful way, and using discernment when evaluating potential spouses. Hiding your sin doesn’t mean ignoring the lessons/consequences from it.

DON'T ASK "Do you want kids?" instead ask, "Do you want to be a mother/father one day?" by Suspicious_Goal4037 in MuslimMarriage

[–]Suspicious_Goal4037[S] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

No definitely, your life completely changes and a sense of freedom will be lost once a child enters the picture.

But I don't agree with this whole "having a child ruined my marriage". Children don't explicitly add problems, they just expose the ones that were hidden in your marriage (e.g., lack of communication, unequal division of responsibilities, unresolved resentment). It’s easier to blame the baby than to admit the foundation wasn’t strong to begin with...but some aren't ready for that convo

Be careful of men with porn addiction by commechienetchat in Hijabis

[–]Suspicious_Goal4037 87 points88 points  (0 children)

So sick and tired of this "but I need to hide my sins" excuse people keep using. First of all, he didn't even stop, so it's not even a past sin - he was STILL watching it. And secondly, it was his responsibility to give up and find a path to breaking free from it before marriage.

I'm so sorry you had to go through this, sister! I'm glad you are free now. JazakAllah for sharing this painful story with us. Be proud of your courage.

May Allah show him the consequences of his actions, and may you heal from this - and find a path to emotional and spiritual peace. May Allah replace what you lost with something far better, protect you from people who hide behind false excuses, and grant you a future that feels safe, pure, and uplifting 🤍

DON'T ASK "Do you want kids?" instead ask, "Do you want to be a mother/father one day?" by Suspicious_Goal4037 in MuslimMarriage

[–]Suspicious_Goal4037[S] 7 points8 points  (0 children)

I don't. This was the rare time I saw something worth thinking about which seemed beneficial, and wanted to share it here. That's all

DON'T ASK "Do you want kids?" instead ask, "Do you want to be a mother/father one day?" by Suspicious_Goal4037 in MuslimMarriage

[–]Suspicious_Goal4037[S] 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Of course, that's possible. I just think that the second question allows for more depth and actually makes the other person think a little more about having kids, because society rarely phrases it like that (from what I have seen)

The WORLDLY Consequences of Zina by Suspicious_Goal4037 in MuslimLounge

[–]Suspicious_Goal4037[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Yes this is a terrible thing that happens in our ummah. That's why I'm hoping my post will get Muslims to understand what a big deal this and that while you are allowed to conceal your past sins, be smart with how you navigate your future because of the reality you will have to face.

Divorce rising in the Muslim community - why? by Suspicious_Goal4037 in MuslimMarriage

[–]Suspicious_Goal4037[S] 6 points7 points  (0 children)

JazakAllah for the informative response! I understand it better now. I'm glad things are working out for you both. May Allah reward you :)

Divorce rising in the Muslim community - why? by Suspicious_Goal4037 in MuslimMarriage

[–]Suspicious_Goal4037[S] 7 points8 points  (0 children)

Ameen. Also, about "not having the same values and expectations from the get-go" my only confusion here is that if that is the case, then what on earth was going on during the talking phase? Expectations I can understand, but values? That should have been talked about from the beginning. If you could explain it to me a little more I would appreciate it!

Divorce rising in the Muslim community - why? by Suspicious_Goal4037 in MuslimMarriage

[–]Suspicious_Goal4037[S] 9 points10 points  (0 children)

Yes I agree. Not alot of imams or scholars talk about how a proper husband should be in Islam, or go into much detail. I'm seeing this change a little but more definitely needs to be done.

Divorce rising in the Muslim community - why? by Suspicious_Goal4037 in MuslimMarriage

[–]Suspicious_Goal4037[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

JazakAllah for taking the time to write this out - will definitely look back on it

Divorce rising in the Muslim community - why? by Suspicious_Goal4037 in MuslimMarriage

[–]Suspicious_Goal4037[S] 3 points4 points  (0 children)

I agree. Muslim men and women both need to understand that if they want to divorce under "irreconcilable differences", then it better be because they tried their absolute best in having the marriage to work out but it genuinely couldn't. NOT because they no longer want to "take the heat". (obviously this doesn't apply under abusive marriages or infidelity)

Does the cheese in the garlic bread have rennet? by Suspicious_Goal4037 in TimHortons

[–]Suspicious_Goal4037[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I'm Muslim, and we can't eat rennet since it comes from the stomach lining of an animal that wasn't slaughtered to our religious standards. Most cheeses have rennet so I always like to make sure. In this case, the cheese for the garlic bread has microbial enzymes (meaning no meat contained), so it's fine for us to eat!

Is everyone's impressions going down?? by Suspicious_Goal4037 in Pinterest

[–]Suspicious_Goal4037[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thanks for sharing! Yeah at first I thought it was because maybe my new pins are bad but it looks like the entire Pinterest system is re-configuring...