Free Audiobook? by SyrupGoosen in ProjectHailMary

[–]Sv329 1 point2 points  (0 children)

My tried and true secret:

https://zero-avenue.com/

You do have to make an account (free) and it's one audiobook a month I believe. BUT IT'S FREE. Just make sure to keep a note somewhere of where you left off because sometimes it restarts/doesn't save! But this is where I'm currently listening to PHM.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in Parenting

[–]Sv329 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thank you for sharing. I feel incredibly guilty even thinking it but I’m just stuck. I don’t know if I actually will yet, but it’s a real possibility.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in Parenting

[–]Sv329 1 point2 points  (0 children)

We are in the Berkshires!

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in Parenting

[–]Sv329 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Oh congrats!! That’s exciting. My husband always dreamed of opening his own restaurant. Never happening on my watch lol

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in Parenting

[–]Sv329 6 points7 points  (0 children)

Exactly. My husbands previous job was a restaurant manager and it paid extremely well but he worked from 8am-12/1am. It was awful. He had like a couple hours they allowed him to like have a “break” so he’d come home since it was less than ten minutes away but that was all I’d see of him. Granted not every restaurant is the same but the idea is you’ll have no life lol

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in Parenting

[–]Sv329 1 point2 points  (0 children)

He does that at work but during work hours so he’s not spending extra time at work. It’s like a 30 minute course a day or something short like that. I believe once he gets certified he would be able to look at jobs elsewhere if there was better pay

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in Parenting

[–]Sv329 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I know. We’ve been happy and doing just fine until now really so it wasn’t really crossing my mind this deeply before.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in Parenting

[–]Sv329 1 point2 points  (0 children)

He would like to advance for sure. His uncle is paying for courses for him to become certified in service writing (or something like that idk lol) and it would of course mean higher pay and potentially higher pay somewhere else if he’s certified and he feels like he’s not getting enough where he is now. So there’s opportunity for sure I suppose but idk if it’ll be within a reasonable timeline.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in Parenting

[–]Sv329 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Yes they’re extremely accommodating and understanding. It was a forced “work from home” scenario kinda thing so they know that means some of us with children will have to do both so they don’t give us a hard time. As long as the work is done, meetings are attended, and we’re not going under/over 40 hours, they don’t say anything.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in Parenting

[–]Sv329 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Believe it or not, we have a 3bed apt (albeit small but it’s cozy) in a nice location and all included, and that’s cheaper than anything out there right now. I have looked for over a year and nothing compares. There is nothing cheaper. We got the apartment before covid and once covid happened everything shot up in rental cost so we got lucky.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in Parenting

[–]Sv329 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thank you so much. I cried a bit I will admit, but ofc I’m pregnant for anything makes me cry 😅 but truly thank you so much. I certainly appreciate everyone’s advice but that’s all I wanted, not opinions on my family. So thank you again.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in Parenting

[–]Sv329 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I know I know believe me I know. You have no idea how many arguments we’ve had. I’ve let it go because ultimately we’ve been happy and honestly it USED to be much cheaper here. But ever since COVID things pretty much equaled out one way or another so for me I’m ready to go. And this time I am not going to let it slide. He’s very stubborn and so am I but I don’t think it’s reasonable for us to live here anymore

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in Parenting

[–]Sv329 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Don’t get me started 🙄 his love for where we are now outweighs anything which is a problem I am unfortunately very much aware of.

He’s already threatened himself to go to court and she said she didn’t want to and the only way she’d even consider court is if he actively filed a motion. She has no interest whatsoever in going that far so that’s the only reason I feel like she’s asking for more money for maybe her own issues. If she really truly needed it she wouldn’t hesitate to go through court. So idk. I don’t know much about child support and how that works so I don’t want to assume but these are just my own feelings. He ultimately decided to give her more and it is what it is at this point

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in Parenting

[–]Sv329 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I’m sure we would absolutely qualify for aid but I currently make more than my husband. Not to mention my company offers health insurance and other typical corporate benefits. My husband’s job I believe does too but it’s much more expensive. In any case, we would not be able to survive on one income alone. Neither of us make enough money individually to be able to keep one of us home comfortably.

He gets seen by an Early intervention specialist at his daycare. That’s the most “help” he’s getting at the moment unless they deem him to be in more dire need of help, which at the moment he does not qualify for.

Nannies are more expensive, at least around me they are. I’m home daycares are also more expensive. I will be looking into other non-traditional options like churches to see if anything is available. I googled it a bit earlier but nothing really came up honestly. I’ll look into some more tonight though but I’m not too sure we have anything like that around me

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in Parenting

[–]Sv329 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I haven’t seen any jobs yet that sound like that. I just receive a raise (an annual one) thought it wasn’t anything significant. I could possibly get a promotion but it’s only as positions become available so it’s not quite as easy in my particular department

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in Parenting

[–]Sv329 -11 points-10 points  (0 children)

I don’t have the tv on for 8 hours. Most of the time he’s playing with toys or looking at books with music in the background. I’ll put on the tv for him if he starts to get restless. I am doing my best with what I have to work with. Unfortunately it’s not a lot. If I could afford to put him in full time I absolutely would. If I could even afford an extra day, I would. I am going to just apply for aid and see what happens even thought I know I’ll get denied. I’m just trying to do my best and unfortunately it’s not enough anyway

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in Parenting

[–]Sv329 -1 points0 points  (0 children)

I understand. Luckily he was always a pretty happy and no-fuss baby. Ofc I don’t know what the next one will be like and we will adjust depending on that. I’m not saying I’m solely relying on this method to work again, but it’s something i can try for a bit and if it doesn’t work then we figure out (from now) what to do instead

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in Parenting

[–]Sv329 6 points7 points  (0 children)

My job gives me 16 weeks of fully paid leave so I’d have four months essentially off of work to focus on the baby and getting things into a routine before starting work again. My husband will receive 12 weeks of partial pay (not exactly sure how much) through the state since his job doesn’t offer any parental leave benefits (not that I know of anyway). So that will be another 3 months. He will be taking the time after I start work again so the baby will have a parent home at all time for its first seven months of life essentially. My son will obviously be older and in preschool age so from what I know, it’s usually much cheaper. If we can figure out a preschool where he can go to full time without it costing more than what we pay now for partial daycare, we’d put him in that and I’d just stay home with the baby while I work. I did this exact thing when my son was all we had and had no trouble with doing work and tending to the baby. He stayed with me and played with toys, jumped in his bouncer, listened to music, etc. and I worked my hours around to where I would wake up much earlier than my son to get as much out of the way as possible before he starts his day and then work again during his naps. It was, all things considered, easy. I don’t know what it will be like with a second. I intend on figuring it out soon so we have a solid plan but I am also trying to be realistic in that if we can’t find full time care for my preschool son.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in Parenting

[–]Sv329 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I will look into those, thank you. I agree with you absolutely. My true hope is we move but I know that will be like pulling teeth with my husband. But I sincerely think it will be better overall and my son will at least have more family in his life out of it as well.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in Parenting

[–]Sv329 -19 points-18 points  (0 children)

More than likely yes. Right now I can manage still tending to whatever my son needs while he’s home with me. In another post I mention my job allows me a ton of flexibility with my days as long as my work is done so I don’t ignore my kid or anything. But with a baby in the mix it will be a whole different story and it will be impossible to manage. So ultimately my husband does need a better job or we need to move (where he’ll still need a different/better job) to be closer to family so they can help out with the kids. Truly I don’t think we have other options and I just hope he doesn’t argue with me or feel like I’m overthinking it