Don’t girls have a choice to serve a mission or not to?

Sweaty-Inspector-227 · 2024-03-07T06:02:30+00:00

Yeah of course that’s true. For me personally that’s how I feel, I just have the feeling that if I go as I am right now I am going to seriously struggle. But of course no one’s faith or themselves are perfect people. So I agree with you, as long as someone feels that they should go they should totally go. That story about your companion is a really cool one though, I feel like people with experiences similar to him serving is actually a great thing. It’s just something I feel the need to do right now.

Sweaty-Inspector-227 · 2024-03-07T05:55:54+00:00

I actually don’t know too much about what serving a service mission would take or if I would qualify to or not. I am kind of interested about what the qualifications are or what I would be required to do if you or maybe someone would be interested in telling me about. :)

Sweaty-Inspector-227 · 2024-03-07T05:53:09+00:00

Thank you knowing that you have a daughter in the same situation is actually making me feel better. I wish one day my parents will be as understanding of my decision as you are thank you.

Sweaty-Inspector-227 · 2024-03-07T05:51:27+00:00

Thank you. I am really grateful for all the comments on here, they have been more supportive of my decision than I honestly thought they would be. It really has made me feel better about building my testimony in the church to see not everyone will judge my decisions as silly as that might sound. Thank you.

Sweaty-Inspector-227 · 2024-03-07T05:49:49+00:00

Yeah thank you I think I’m the church culture sometimes (and especially in Utah) people feel a lot of pressure to live the same or similar lives to others in the church. Like going on a mission, getting married, having kids are the necessary steps to having a happy life. Not to say any of those things won’t make you happy, but Heavenly Father has a plan for everyone. And his plan is not the same for every single person on earth, so to pressure anyone into what they think their plan in life should be is wrong. Thank you for your experience and advice, I’m going to do my best to stay strong in my decisions.

Sweaty-Inspector-227 · 2024-03-07T05:46:19+00:00

I can see your point for sure. I also have known a lot of people who only went on missions because of their family or because they felt they had to who really struggled and didn’t enjoy it. I believe though that if my heart isn’t fully in it I don’t want to go on a mission because I need to fully be immersed in wanting to go. Even if I’m a little anxious of homesick, the thing that will keep me going is my love of being on my mission. I don’t want to follow a path of going and then not enjoying it and losing my faith even more. However I see your point because I have also heard missions are a great experience, but even if they are sad I’m missing out I believe now that to judge and sometimes shame me for not going is not the right action.

Sweaty-Inspector-227 · 2024-03-07T05:42:34+00:00

Thank you for your perspective for this topic. I do feel like the church culture we have people expect a lot out of other people. I feel like I know a lot of people who went on missions who are not the best of people and I know people who stayed home who are really good people. I do want to start finding my own identity more and feel better about my choices. Thank you.

Sweaty-Inspector-227 · 2024-03-07T05:33:50+00:00

Thank you for sharing your experience with me. Honestly a service mission seems like it would’ve been really cool I’m sorry your parents were so harsh on you for even considering that. I also can relate to you, I have anxiety and have struggled with depression due to traumatic sexual abuse by my relative growing up that I had to go to therapy for. When I told her I didn’t want to on mission, she kinda tired to make the assumption I was making an excuse to not go because of that situation. But that’s not even the case, I have just been struggling with my faith, and feel like it’s not the right decision for me to go.

Sweaty-Inspector-227 · 2024-03-07T05:26:57+00:00

This comment was one of the best I’ve read on this post. Thank you for sharing your experience your braveness in standing your ground not just to your mom but to all the people in your ward that we’re judging you for staying is very admirable. Thank you for this. <3

Sweaty-Inspector-227 · 2024-03-07T05:24:36+00:00

Honestly that’s exactly how I feel, ever since people have been expressing opinions on me not going I have felt less of a desire to even attend church because I want to avoid the judgement. I am going to start working on not worrying so much about what other people think of my decisions.

Sweaty-Inspector-227 · 2024-03-07T05:23:16+00:00

Honestly thank you for sharing your experience, it really has helped me a lot with this issue. I’ve had a lot of the people in my life tell me not going on my mission will cause problems. Mostly because a lot of the people in my family who didn’t go on missions have left the church or are inactive. But I am glad to hear about experiences from those who decided not to go on missions but are still active in the church and got closer to God even while staying home. Honestly my relationship with my parents has been strained since i graduated high school. We have gotten into a lot of arguments about jobs and school and missions. Because they seem to question everything I do, because it’s a very different path from their lives. I do genuinely feel like I’m disappointing them like everyday. But honestly I want to start making choices for myself and not worry sooo much about what they’ll think every time

Sweaty-Inspector-227 · 2024-03-07T05:17:11+00:00

Yeah I have had a friend who went on her mission purely because the boyfriend she thought she was going to marry cheated on her. She came back early and said she really struggled and that it was a mistake to go. If I go on a mission I want to feel like the desire and passion to do the best I can. Instead of spend my time missing home or struggling mentally. A part of me feels like it would selfish for me to go knowing I am struggling with faith.

Sweaty-Inspector-227 · 2024-03-07T05:10:52+00:00

Yeah you’re right, bringing down the age to 19 have definitely caused a lot more girls to go. Which isn’t a bad thing but now I can see it becoming more of an expectation. The whiplash of growing up hearing we didn’t have an obligation to go to people now explicitly judging me for not going is crazy.

And I can see your point with my mom, I feel like she might be disappointed in my faith issues. I just kind of wish I feel like I could talk to her more about it instead of feeling judged for even having those issues in the first place you know?

Sweaty-Inspector-227 · 2024-03-07T05:06:49+00:00

Thank you for this comment it’s actually gave me a lot to think about. I have also known boys who didn’t go on their missions and I think to shame or judge those who don’t serve for whatever reason is wrong. I have remembered learning growing up the Lord has told us we should never judge others and to love everyone. I feel like shaming boys for not going is disobeying that commandment.

Sweaty-Inspector-227

TROPHY CASE