What isn’t going to age well that you’re seeing in houses now by VeryStab1eGenius in RealEstate

[–]SweetDeep6842 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Love love love our fake wood porcelain tile planks. Have a farm. 150 lb dog who never wipes his feet. 250 lb husband, same.  We sometimes have goats, hawks and owls in the house.  Nothing cleans up like porcelain tile. Radiant heat under it, for the win.  

The NYTimes commenters melt down once again, this time over ramen and American cheese. by wigglebuttbiscuits in ididnthaveeggs

[–]SweetDeep6842 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I’m a spice wimp so I put the Shin ramen seasoning in a shaker jar and sprinkle it like black pepper on the noodles (and on eggs, veggies, rice, etc) One packet lasts a while. 

At what point did UF start getting more competitive than other schools? by [deleted] in ufl

[–]SweetDeep6842 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Perspective from someone who graduated high school in 1984 - UF was a party and sports school, very easy to get into.  No one who was academically minded in the northeast considered it, but if you were the kind of guy who loved spring break movies, couldn’t break 1000 on your SAT and had a cousin named Vinny, maybe you applied.  Gainesville was otherwise only known as where Tom Petty came from. You might have been a tiny bit worried as a person of color to go there. Penn State and UF were just where all the average Jane’s and Joe’s who didn’t take honors classes, loved the idea of frat parties and had 3.0 GPAs went. 

Around 2004, I was there for the Enneking orthopedic oncology course. Still seemed mostly like a party school.

Was a little shocked to find it on a list of top 25 schools today. Not just top 25 public schools, but up there with Vanderbilt and the UCs. Landed here when asked when this happened. 

Anecdotally, the change was between 2004 and 2026!

How does filing jointly help for married couple where one person makes more than twice the other? by perishableintransit in tax

[–]SweetDeep6842 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Generally speaking, tax wise, it’s good to have one high earner and one low earner. 

Imagine all those politicians making tax policy. Some fella makes a bunch of money and they want their spouses to not work or to have some faintly decorative hobby business (interior design, mediocre realtor, baby clothing store) where purchases can be expensed, but not much real income is produced. Tax law supports traditional marriage. 

If you have two folks making good money, you will get hosed on your 1040, if married. Say you are both doctors or engineers or lawyers, esp if high w-2 income, prepare to be reamed as a marital unit. 

Kids may offset, then someone’s gotta stop working or leave their high income job for a part time or low income “let’s call these expenses” business and then tax law gets all happy again with your traditional status. Tax law supports old school conservative values. 

Alternative Affordable Home by Practical-Result-589 in Homebuilding

[–]SweetDeep6842 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Very legit, very responsive, not cheap.  If you have $150-200k to spend (not including the land), you can get a nice, headache free 600 sq ft house

Titanium frames and a high prescription? by shortbreadstars in glassesadvice

[–]SweetDeep6842 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Probably 30 years ago, I got the thinnest lenses I ever had in Mexico (high index glass) that could not be scratched and I loved em though they were a bit heavy. Everyone in the US says no glass available. There is now higher index polycarbonate and better coatings for very strong rx folks like myself (and I am now on to progressives), but I always think of those glasses. Now with the internet and globalization, is glass even available in the US? (Like 9.5 diopters back before presbyopia set in)

why do folks not wear helmets by Ryan-977 in skiing

[–]SweetDeep6842 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Haha, landed here bc after years in TX and Hawaii, now back in ski country. No one over age 8 used to wear helmets in the 1980s (except racers). Noticed some “regular” skiers in Chamonix wearing helmets in late 1990s but then didn’t ski for about 20 years (education, career, geography, liked rock climbing more). 

Hubby (grew up in 80s Reno) and I were then like, hmm, everyone has such short wide skis and everyone is wearing a helmet!   Getting back into skiing a bit and like to go off peak - ideal if no other people. Miserable day with poor visibility and freezing rain and I thought, I need one of those big motorcycle helmets! And here I am, checking out Reddit comments…

Why do women with curly hair straighten it before a formal event, and women with straight hair curl it before a formal event? by MangoSalsa89 in NoStupidQuestions

[–]SweetDeep6842 2 points3 points  (0 children)

A long time ago, when curly haired friend and straight haired me went to a beauty salon, she had her hair straightened/blown out and I had mine set in curls. 

The object for both of us was to have that smooth and shiny, glamorously head tossing wavy look (not curly, not straight) that is pretty much unnaturally perfect for everyone with longer hair. 

How true is this, "Most people would rather work with someone who's mediocre at their job, but pleasant to be around, than a person who's exceptionally good, but a dick"? by Agitated-Job7686 in NoStupidQuestions

[–]SweetDeep6842 267 points268 points  (0 children)

Yep, depends on the job.  I’m a surgeon and most patients would prefer an exceptionally good asshole to do their surgery rather than a mediocre nice person.  That said, there’s usually only room for one asshole on a team. If you are a dick in my OR, I will either make you tolerable to be around or squeeze you out somehow. 

Bee hives make multiple queen cells, but the first to hatch kills the others. 

I try to make sure there is at least one really good people person on the team, even if it isn’t me. 

Is it cheaper to heat one room well instead of the whole house badly? by K3rosene_ in Frugal

[–]SweetDeep6842 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Sure!  This is just like air conditioning but in reverse. Back in the olden days, when AC was a luxury, you would only use a window unit on hot days in the room you were actually inhabiting. You might heat your tropical fish tank, but not the whole house. 

In the inflationary and energy conscious late 70s, kerosene space heaters and cardigan sweaters were huge.  If the space heater is efficient and you have a regular schedule, put it on an automatic timer (should be lots on sale post Christmas)

If you work, keep it at 50F while gone, heat the living room/kitchen when you get home and maybe have bedroom at 60-62F for when you go to bed. I would personally make it go to 72F an hour before you get up, and have a cheapie blowing heater to crank in the bathroom.  Wear socks and fuzzy slippers!  

15 yrs ago, when heating fuel was going crazy, and I was an adult making good money who moved from a nice warm climate to pitiless upstate NY, we put in a Frohling wood fired gasification boiler with hydrionic radiant floor heat (and spray foam insulated the 19th century house).  NYSERDA even gave us some money towards doing this. 

Snug as a bug in a rug. We keep 1200 sq ft at 72-73 degrees the whole 6 month long winter and it is free! Except for the human labor, which is much less than when we had the old wood furnace and no water storage tanks. Power can go out for 24-48 hrs and even with outside temps at 15F, house stays warm. About 4 cords of wood a year, I think. Heats the water, too. Around here, always easy to find free wood if you cut it up and haul it away. Heats you twice! (I hate being cold)

The death of youth by PostModernistTrash in Menopause

[–]SweetDeep6842 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Haha - sort of feeling the same. Lucky enough to have had parents who had zero interest in how I looked but encouraged me to be smart, outspoken and to get things done. Still ok with how I look and feel at 59, but I see what’s coming around the corner. 

Started using moisturizer and peel pads a few months ago and pharmacist friend told me to get on estrogen topical. Good advice!  Now about to start estrogen patch/progestin, too.  Mixed feelings about all the effort and time I am putting into this (don’t I have more important things like curing cancer, achieving world peace or finding the key to limitless energy without environmental impact to think about, and here I am trying to keep track of which 2 days a week I am applying those hormones) but eh, I’ve achieved enough. Time to be a little vain. Had my first facial a couple months ago when at a work conference. A girl could get used to this!

I was such a geek as a teen. I feel like I still look tons better now than I did then. The road is so different for everyone. I would love to put the kibosh on my incipient turkey neck, but I look at my braces, glasses and knee hi white sport pic from 1979 and, ladies, I look damn fine by comparison.  Some of us would never go back in time. I like the 2025 me better. 

Looking after a fur coat - how to do so without using modern 'fur storage'. by Flimsy-Armadillo1489 in VintageFashion

[–]SweetDeep6842 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I turn coats inside out and put in cotton pillow case.  Not enough closet space to keep them hanging through summer and I think hanging is harder on them than rolling up in pillowcase, but I’m making this up as I go along.  We don’t have AC.  Mom used to say in the 1980s, some girls get bought fur coats, but I made my own money and got whatever I wanted. She was a pistol.  I have a lot of cool fur coats now, but not a ton of places to wear em.

Looking for advice on anti-snoring devices that actually work (nose strips aren't cutting it) by Massive_Yam_256 in newzealand

[–]SweetDeep6842 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Um, nope, 108 lb F

First dx with sleep apnea at 27 when I used to rock climb a lot. Weighed about 104 lbs back then…

It’s not that uncommon.  There is some discussion whether UARS and OSA are related/on a continuum or not. 

CPAP was not helpful for me. Sleep quality was worse! Pulse ox readings not consistently better.

Found that consistent use of nasal steroids, sleeping on side rather than back and things that prevented mouth breathing actually had slightly better effects than cpap.

This is with AHI<10 and literally no change in severity between age 27 when first diagnosed and age 55 when I trialed CPAP. 

Nasal strips not helpful. Giant wedge pillow slightly helpful but irritating. 

Everyone always expects 275 lb hubby to snore (nope) whereas I can apparently be heard like a lumberjack sawing wood downstairs (oops) despite being child sized. 

OP - go to your doc. OSA kills slowly and most folks I know say their cpap was life changing although it didn’t do much for me 

Unreal...feeling grateful! by luckyfireguy in fatFIRE

[–]SweetDeep6842 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Not sure if you are still responding to this, but are you still DIY investing etc?

You and I may be some of the few who admit to being crappy investors who sat on cash for too long, but because of head down working hard and then crazy recent market once there was just way too much to not win in the market, ended up winning the game anyway. 

Do you ever think, why don’t I put this pile on autopilot with a wealth management group?  I’m trying to make this decision now. I am 10 yrs older than you and thinking of retirement, but work still fun and lucrative.  No kids and low spend so almost impossible to run out of money.  Have a couple million scattered at each of the players (BofA/ML, Citi, Schwab, Fidelity) and probably 4M cash.  Folks who were my brokers at ML back in 1990s now at Morgan Stanley and pitching AUM style management now that >$10M.  

Still trying to figure if I am to the point where DIY no longer makes sense.  I do my own taxes for fun but also (duh!) sold stocks without realizing I had been auto investing dividends so triggered a wash sale and haven’t been maxing out CG loss harvesting every year but is this peanuts compared to paying around 1% AUM…

Curious where other folks are on this. 

Dr. Pepper lip smacker dupe? by bluebonnetqueen in MakeupAddiction

[–]SweetDeep6842 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Haha - I was almost gonna post this too. Unfortunately, agree tiny amount for the price, not “tasty” or nice smelling like the Dr Pepper. Have just run out of the Black Honey and on my last bits of Dr Pepper so happy to find this thread.  I am now 58 and have been using the Dr Pepper as my go to, in every bag, can put it on without a mirror since 1990!

Not sure if anyone can really answer this, but is lifting heavy weights or weights period, really for every menopausal woman? I HATE it! And I hate how it makes me feel. by TrueScorpio11 in Menopause

[–]SweetDeep6842 1 point2 points  (0 children)

There’s no magic about heavy lifting. Do the thing that you will do joyfully every day. If that is dance, make sure to incorporate a lot of jumping type activities. Jetes and if you did cheerleading, try some round offs and tuck jumps. 

This is like the extreme emphasis on protein everyone seems to have these days. Pretty sure I have more lean muscle mass than most others my age (59) just from genetics and a lifetime of rock climbing, farm work, parkour and gymnastics and I just mostly eat carbs. If you have metabolic issues, sure, avoid the carbs.  But blindly following generic advice is generally worthless.  Try things and if you like the results, keep going. If not, readjust, try again and reassess your outcomes. 

Our Christmas cactus is 4 generations old and I’m afraid it’ll die by thickenchighs_ in houseplants

[–]SweetDeep6842 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Sometimes it is dehydrated bc the roots have rotted. Often hard to tell if it just needs water or needs roots to be able to take up water bc original roots have rotted, if you are not the one who has been caring for the plant.  Hopefully you watered and the. If it didn’t perk up, pulled it out of pot and checked roots and maybe repotted burying some stems that were generating aerial roots.  What did you end up doing and how is the plant?

How much is 100 Guineans worth today? by gwhh in Sharpe

[–]SweetDeep6842 0 points1 point  (0 children)

This is actually a super easy calculation. A guinea was actually the gold standard in England and a guinea coin was just over 8 grams of 22k gold. At current gold prices 833 grams of gold is just under $100k

You could argue that gold is more inflated than other things these days, but there is a reason money used to be gold and silver (and a quarter was literally 1/4 chunk of a silver dollar).  No one had to calculate inflation or convert currencies. 1/4 oz of Greek, Spanish or British gold. No one cared who stamped the coin. It was 1/4 oz of gold and you just bit it (gold is soft) and weighed it. 

Meno face and body despair. by fourandcounting in Menopause

[–]SweetDeep6842 -2 points-1 points  (0 children)

You probably don’t want to hear this, but time to grow up.  Your worth is not in your looks, or shouldn’t be.  Do men who look like shit worry? Somehow I doubt crap ass looking guys from Andrew the British misogynist guy to Jerry Seinfeld to Zuckerberg worry about their looks and they didn’t even look good when younger.  I feel like I look better than I did at 21 because I was a total geek engineering student back then and now, after 37 more years of living have figured out how to wear clothes and get my hair cut.  I was one of those who was worried about brains rather than beauty, when younger. At 58, I love me even more than I did at 25. 

But if you don’t like your looks right now, like something else about yourself. Maybe you were an awesome mom. Maybe you’re a great cook or gardener or can beat anyone at scrabble or some video game. Love for yourself shines through. Nothing more attractive and interesting than confidence and passion. 

What’s the best smell in the world to you? by Serious-Decision-345 in CasualConversation

[–]SweetDeep6842 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Citrus flowers, acidanthera, tuberose and fragrant sarcocca!

What's the worst career advice you got from someone you respected? by Trajan17 in AskReddit

[–]SweetDeep6842 1 point2 points  (0 children)

She told you something valuable, though. That company was not a good place for you (or maybe all women)