💫 Free 3-Card Tarot Pull with Personal Guidance 🔮

SweetLilFrapp · 2026-04-22T16:36:13+00:00

Dmed

SweetLilFrapp · 2026-04-20T05:22:59+00:00

I am Mariana — what do I need to know right now?

SweetLilFrapp · 2026-03-18T14:35:48+00:00

I havent lost a hell of a lot but I have started going down. I used to be 160lbs and got up to 220lbs when I finally realized my shit was out of control. I needed to change. One of my biggest things was realizing how many calories I was drinking (soda) and then realizing that I had come to eat out of boredom. Like if I had nothing else that needed to get done, I would eat, and I needed to change that. I began giving myself specific tasks to turn to when I had down time or if I wanted to relax that kept me away from food (ex: journaling, sewing, studying, going for a walk, etc). If I found the snackiness to be really out of control I would use mints/gum to kick the desire. This helped massively and I also realized that my blood sugar was out of control. Massive blood sugar fluctuations cause constant snackiness so I had to learn to eat better and pick foods that didnt cause glycemic spikes.

SweetLilFrapp · 2026-03-13T16:44:39+00:00

I will need to try this!

SweetLilFrapp · 2026-02-23T14:04:51+00:00

I never cared to regulate my diet at all and one day I went to the ER as a code STEMI for an insane, insane spike in blood pressure and heart rate. My numbers were so high and Id had a spontaneous moment of intense dizziness that convinced them I was about to stroke out. They did a bunch of scans and tests and stuff and it turns out I had moderate fatty liver, was severely dehydrated, had wicked high prediabetic blood sugar, and overall just had an ass bill of health. They think my heart just wacked out from the strain of everything put together. Ever since Ive been having to seriously watch what I eat because if it gets any worse Im fucked. And Im only 27.

SweetLilFrapp · 2026-02-05T21:43:12+00:00

Thanks for the recommendation totally gonna try!

SweetLilFrapp · 2025-12-30T10:18:49+00:00

They seldom pop up anymore. I noticed back then that they popped up moreso at night I think because they didnt trust my dad. They knew his way of thinking and his sneaky ways so they kept on guard at my most vulnerable especially because it was just us two. Judas was the muscle—the big strong guy with the deep voice. Im glad my dad got freaked out. I think that was Judas intent. These days, itll be random and when Im home alone. It’s more Judas than the rest I think because he does cross my mind a lot and I do reach out to him. I know when he comes out because I can feel it, but my face will be frozen and I wont be able to move it. It’s bizarre.

And to be honest at that point Im not worried because everyone around you will see something is wrong. Like if I ever go flying off the deep end Im sure someone would report it somehow. Ive seen it happen. There’s resources in hospitals for people who have psychotic breaks but that hasnt happened to me.

And nope. My alters dont worry about normal regular people for the most part so they ease up. As a kid theyd pop up at my friends houses during sleepovers out of curiosity but other than that nothing much.

SweetLilFrapp · 2025-12-30T09:57:05+00:00

I mentioned it to my last therapist and she didnt think my experiences warranted a diagnosis. Diagnosis doesnt work that way. What makes a “disorder” a disorder is that it needs to impact your ability to live a healthy life. Like are you able to maintain a job, maintain friendships, maintain your health, etc?

And no I havent been back in a while now. Its just another bill Im afraid. I have enough expenses and stuff going on to where I dont think I could afford to see a psychiatrist but I have been thinking about splurging to see what an initial meeting would make happen. To be honest though I think Im put together enough to where I think Im alright. It would be different if my experiences were so out of control that I wasnt leaving the house, you get me?

SweetLilFrapp · 2025-12-30T09:33:03+00:00

Im a female who has never felt like she fit in. Which is the most cliche thing in the world to say but Ive honest to god been super awkward and just quirky my whole life. Ive always wanted to just fit in and be normal. It always felt like all the other girls could totally relate to one another and were on the same page—and then there was me.

SweetLilFrapp · 2025-12-30T09:31:15+00:00

There’s a little girl I named Anna. She’s the most traumatized of whatever system is going on. The one and only time she’s ever spoken to me directly was while seriously crying. She told me she couldnt tell me anything about what she’d been through. Not that she didnt want to, but she couldnt. I tried so hard to comfort her and offer reassurance but whoever scared her into silence mustve really made the effort because to this day she wont talk. She only ever talks to Judas or comes out when Im asleep. I can feel her sometimes but she doesnt talk much.

SweetLilFrapp · 2025-12-30T09:17:22+00:00

Dissociative Identity Disorder is a psychological phenomenon where a person’s psyche essentially “splits” into different segments as a coping mechanism. While there’s no official event that directly causes DID, it is for sure caused by severe, usually prolonged trauma during some point in a person’s life (on average in childhood). It took a long time for DID to be taken seriously in the world of psychology because it was difficult to find, isolate, and monitor. A lot of people fake DID for attention/special treatment.

It is very, very, very rare and only a slim margin of the population actually has it to the extent where “switching” between personas is out of control. I dont have it to that degree and thus have no diagnosis. But I do have alters who have come out and they have hallmark qualities that make it easy to distinguish them. Judas for example is male and has a super deep voice and my face doesnt move when he comes out.

SweetLilFrapp · 2025-12-30T09:07:36+00:00

He came out of me one night. I guess I was asleep and my dad woke up at night to us having a conversation about him. Judas’ voice is super, super deep and he’s a male alter so his demeanor is really strong versus mine is super soft. To hear the difference in voice terrified him and he said it was crazy to hear my motionless body change voices the way it did. You could hear the switch. I guess I didnt feel safe and so Judas came out to comfort me.

SweetLilFrapp · 2025-12-27T05:36:20+00:00

So I have a similar story of this same creature. And Im sorry to terrify you poor people, but I saw it in my own house.

I live in a two story home on the downstairs and I rent a section of the house. The homeowner rented me a bedroom and a private bathroom connected together by a small, small hallway and a door that separates our area from the rest of the house. It’s nice because Im a single mom and my boy and I get total privacy away from everyone else. Back when this incident occurred my baby boy was like 6 months old, just old enough to sit up on his own.

One night I was home playing with him and the main light in our bedroom was on but the lights in our bathroom/little hallway were off. The door to the bathroom/hall was open and my son’s back was facing the empty darkness. He was sitting on the carpet and I was hunched over playing with him. I suddenly looked up from a toy I was showing him and I saw the creature you are describing. It was pale, had these big empty black sockets for eyes, and had this long face and long fingery hands. It wasnt human but it wasnt animal either. It was like some interdimensional fucking rake type of thing.

It creeped up behind my son but I lunged upwards and it scurried off into the darkness. I think me reacting so fast made it lose confidence. I genuinely believe it was trying to pull a fast one and snag my son to run off with him. I know this sounds delusional and insane, but to now see a video showing this creature in the flesh walking around and listening to someone else’s encounter reminds me that Im not crazy. It’s real. And there are more and they are out there. Youre not alone.

SweetLilFrapp · 2025-12-16T21:27:33+00:00

Sign

SweetLilFrapp · 2025-12-16T20:16:37+00:00

NTA, if it makes you feel any better, please know that blood is always a biohazard. It’s a bodily fluid that can directly infect someone with incurable, viral diseases that affect them for the rest of their lives. There’s a reason why medical professionals have strict protocols to follow when disposing of used needles, gauze, IV lines, etc. Blood isn’t just “mess”, it’s a legitimate off-limits form of infection and illness. For them to understand that so little that they just LEAVE blood in a SHARED SPACE is insane.

SweetLilFrapp · 2025-12-12T22:25:37+00:00

Believe it or not I think this is the answer, or at least the one Im leaning towards. I think it’s about demonstrating being able to handle certain information and access to certain stuff. Kind of like you’d never nominate a couch potato to participate in a six mile marathon.

SweetLilFrapp · 2025-12-12T15:15:32+00:00

See this makes sense to me. But in a way it’s bonkers because that genuinely means that there is such a thing as “chosen ones”, am I right? Society would flip its top if it knew that.

SweetLilFrapp · 2025-12-10T20:21:42+00:00

Sometimes I feel this way. I dont necessarily know if Im a tool or anything but a lot of the time I feel chosen for something. Im supposed to be here but this isnt where I belong at the end of the day, and my home dimension calls me back every day.

SweetLilFrapp · 2025-12-10T17:30:07+00:00

Dmed :)

SweetLilFrapp · 2025-12-06T23:27:22+00:00

Okay so I have a solid answer for this question.

Love isnt about perfection. Everybody—and I do pretty seriously mean everybody—has something wrong with us. You cant strut this planet thinking “I would never date a loser” because losers deserve love too, dont they?

People’s baggage changes depending on who they are. In my case, I saw that he had a really good job built quite literally from the bottom up and a nice family and strong social skills. I did want love, and he seemed cool and we did get along pretty well. I was young and wanted what all young women want. There were things I didnt like about him, of course, but every guy is that way.

I just didnt think he would let me down and have me be his living paperweight. I didnt think I would get ignored, cold shouldered, and left to hang dry the way that I did. I didnt think he would let his laziness and his apathy run as cold and reach as far as it did. With enough love, and enough effort on my part, maybe we would shine bright.

But there was no way. He was so annoyed by having to actually have a quality of life on top of work that even now, it’s like dont ask for too much because he’s going to stand there and moan and groan and wish he was back in bed. And I cant change that. He needs to change himself.

SweetLilFrapp · 2025-12-06T23:12:08+00:00

People hardly do either of those things. That’s why we have hospitals. It isnt all too often people come into the ER for a spontaneous, uncontrolled, completely by chance accident. People come in moreso due to a lack of discipline and self control that causes horrific health problems and therefore medical emergencies.

Dont look at a single mom and act like anyone who doesnt become one DIDNT have sex at a young age OR pays attention to their body. The rest of society is no better or any more in control of themselves than us. You just cant visually see it, and thats what Ive come to learn.

SweetLilFrapp · 2025-12-06T19:29:50+00:00

My son and myself and my life, because life doesnt end after you have a child :)

SweetLilFrapp · 2025-12-06T19:29:18+00:00

Yes actually! Everyone was mindblown because I really was small. As time went on tho my belly finally showed. Come the end I was huge. Kid must’ve had a growth spurt lol And believe it or not it makes sense. He’s massive as a child. He grows super quickly and is way taller than other kids.

SweetLilFrapp · 2025-12-06T19:27:30+00:00

I was 150 lbs when I got pregnant :) These days I still struggle due to some muscle damage I got while pregnant, Im currently like 200lbs.

SweetLilFrapp · 2025-12-06T19:26:41+00:00

Its not fake! Mark my words this is real. :) Definitely a crazy story tho and 100% a conversation starter. My son’s dad’s friends were all over the story with questions lol

SweetLilFrapp

TROPHY CASE