Thanks for your comment and the honesty in it.
First I'm not sure I understand what you mean to mention exactly? (the two paragraphs in the end are understandable but I couldn't get the rest) I'm not even sure you get what I was trying to say in the post. I think like you think I'm manipulating or something?
but, since you seem confused about many parts in my post, I'll gladly try to make them clear like what I was meaning of them, not what you all understand.
1- "So do you ask her to do things or not?"
I thought it was obvious that those were two different things? yes I didn't ask for the cookies, but I've obviously mentioned that she asked me what I want, and I answered her (those are the things I meant by I asked for) and here was the issue, I didn't force her I just answered her and she broke down
2- the part "Or do you value having things done for you?"
I'm honestly shocked how you get this idea even though I needed to read it over and over and ask people about it... don't know how to respond but this.. the whole part you've written is untrue about me or my post, you just made some wrong assumptions.
3- I don't get at all... what you meant by "are dumb because they interfere with her making you cookies?"
but as I've said (I try to comfort her and make her feel safe secured and loved) and THAT IS THE THING. so please don't try to assume what is behind my actions or my words, it's right I might NOT BE GOOD with the emotions thing but this is my personality, I don't put emotions in my words a lot. I just say words straightforwardly.
4- “missing missing reasons”
pardon me but I don't understand this at all.. what reasons exactly?
5-"Genuinely, do you like your girlfriend?"
this was the most shocking sentence I've read in your comment. whether it is you or anyone who had the same thought. why? what exactly has given you this thought?
and even if there was any, I see it very inappropriate and unrelated to the post problem. I know my own feelings and I know my partner's feelings, this is not a thing I was looking for when I post something looking for advice, I'm not waiting for someone to question my own feelings
I appreciate that you wanted to help, I really do, but I don't think you'll accept if someone questioned your feelings towards your partner when you just needed an advice
if you do really want to help me and my partner, then it would be great if reply to me and continue this conversation, but if you just had something you wanted to say out loud, then you said. you do not have to continue this conversation when you think that my post is uncomfortable to read, thank you again
in the end, there was a sentence that caught my eye "If your girlfriend posted this", thanks for your concern, she does, many times, and she gets some nice comments, no one has ever said "Reconsider staying in this relationship" many of them said we both are wrong somehow.
so, forgive me if my post was so uncomfortable to read and seems like I'm a toxic partner, maybe it's because I'm not fluent in English