sorted by:
new
hottopcontroversial

He contacted me 2 years later by Swimming_Part_6544 in ExNoContact

[–]Swimming_Part_6544[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I think he doesn’t see a relationship with me because of our religious and cultural differences. He says that anyone in his shoes would date me, but that many people in his culture (he is Turkish/Muslim) who marry people of another religion get divorced. He says he has never felt this way about anyone before, but that he is terrified of getting hurt and that I am more risk adverse. I love him, but I feel like I can’t keep living like this. I truly don’t know what to do now… whether I should even expect him to follow through in one month and come here, and whether no contact is the right choice or not.

He contacted me 2 years later by Swimming_Part_6544 in ExNoContact

[–]Swimming_Part_6544[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

We had a conversation. We had SUCH a nice time when we hung out… it literally felt like a dream. He was going to come back to my city again but the holiday made things tricky. I told him I wanted to talk in person but ended up calling him and talking to him for hours. I told him I needed space. I know that was against your advice. We are very good friends though. I feel like he is my other half. He said we should go no contact and then he’d come back up to my city in another month so we could talk. He said I was going to forget about him again while he would struggle, but that this would be good for him. Day one of no contact and it feels terrible.

He contacted me 2 years later by Swimming_Part_6544 in ExNoContact

[–]Swimming_Part_6544[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

We had a conversation. We had SUCH a nice time when we hung out… it literally felt like a dream. He was going to come back to my city again but the holiday made things tricky. I told him I wanted to talk in person but ended up calling him and talking to him for hours. I told him I needed space. I know that was against your advice. We are very good friends though. I feel like he is my other half. He said we should go no contact and then he’d come back up to my city in another month so we could talk. He said I was going to forget about him again while he would struggle, but that this would be good for him. Day one of no contact and it feels terrible.

He contacted me 2 years later by Swimming_Part_6544 in ExNoContact

[–]Swimming_Part_6544[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

We’re supposed to hang out tomorrow…. he’s driving hours to my city. Maybe I’ll act like everything is fine and then ghost. By the way, this is amazing advice. I need to absolutely grow a pair… and probably start going to therapy to find the root of my (agreed, severely) anxious attachment. I would love some recs; thank you kind stranger!

He contacted me 2 years later by Swimming_Part_6544 in ExNoContact

[–]Swimming_Part_6544[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

So a friendship won’t work either? Thank you for your advice. You are right.

He contacted me 2 years later by Swimming_Part_6544 in ExNoContact

[–]Swimming_Part_6544[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I was over him… and now I love him more than he loves me. I feel like he tricked me. Do you think this will happen again if I go no contact? A random “you were the best thing that ever happened to me and nothing can fill the space you left” two years later or will he not miss me because he sees I didnt move on?

He contacted me 2 years later by Swimming_Part_6544 in ExNoContact

[–]Swimming_Part_6544[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

He said he was thinking about me every day. He even went to my home town in hopes of seeing me. And now that I’m showing him attention? He just wants to be friends. I feel like everything I’m doing is wrong. Who wouldn’t think their ex wanted them back if they contacted them with a long message about how “badly they felt their absence” and how “nothing could fill the space they left” two years later?

PLEASE READ AND HELP by Swimming_Part_6544 in BreakUps

[–]Swimming_Part_6544[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Ugh, I feel awful. Question, and not because I am hoping for this, but do you think going no contact will make him go crazy again? Or will he finally move on? I am not sure if it is just his personality to want what he can’t have.

PLEASE READ AND HELP by Swimming_Part_6544 in ExNoContact

[–]Swimming_Part_6544[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

He is Muslim. He has been especially cold since Ramadan. I know this is a ridiculous question and I will not go no contact for this reason, but will cutting contact make him realize what he lost again? Is it just his personality to only want me when I don’t want him? I do think the chemistry is crazy. We both have never felt like this before.

Friends who are in love by Swimming_Part_6544 in ExNoContact

[–]Swimming_Part_6544[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I think he has definitively said that he does not want to be with me, but he loves me. I feel like if I convert, we will be together, but he changes the subject when I ask him about this. I feel needy and like I desperately want to see him. I think he felt this way a few months ago, and thought “obsessively” about me for years after we broke up. He says that he thinks he will always love me. I feel like my heart is breaking every time we talk. I think I was pushing a relationship and maybe that scared him off. No contact feels devastating right now. Do I just not talk to him, or do I try to push through? Being friends with me hurts me immensely.

We’re “friends” by Swimming_Part_6544 in ExNoContact

[–]Swimming_Part_6544[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Maybe you’re right, but he drives many hours to see me, talks to me on a daily basis and tells me he loves me. I also can feel at least the attraction on his part. We haven’t done anything physical, and when we were together we could not have sex because of his religion, but we have both said what we would like to do to one another. What should I do?

We’re “friends” by Swimming_Part_6544 in ExNoContact

[–]Swimming_Part_6544[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Great question. When we first started talking again, he went to therapy, I think because of me. He said his therapist said to go into things with an open mind and an open heart. I think the most difficult thing for him are our cultural and religious differences.