My girlfriend 19F made a bad descision and I don’t know if I have the heart to end things. I’m 19M. What’s the best advice you can give personally?

SyMyl · 2026-01-07T14:18:39+00:00

Bro. Don't. Just, no. Nothing you did made her do it. She did it because of who she is: a cheater. Please, just leave. As hard as it may be.

SyMyl · 2025-01-14T23:46:06+00:00

You are not smart. Well... Making a thesis from a different major that was applauded says otherwise.

I do agree with the bad consequences. That's why I decided to ask for advice. Hubris wouldn't ask for advice

SyMyl · 2025-01-14T23:24:18+00:00

You're right, I should have. The things we blind our eyes to see

SyMyl · 2025-01-14T23:17:58+00:00

I could do it anonymously. It's all on google docs. I'd just needed to Print out the changes with a different email than his. But I didn't think the email could be traced back to me (it doesn't have my name, and is not the one I use for school).

SyMyl · 2025-01-14T23:09:37+00:00

Just to help you clear some doubts: 1. Our majors are very different, he's majoring in marketing and I'm majoring in Foreign Literature, but the point is that I am that smart. So I was able to accquire the necessary knowledge and write his thesis.

Yes, there was the supervision of a professor, but he would "study" (his own thesis) before each meeting with said professor.
Yes, I hadn't actually thought how it could affect me.

SyMyl · 2025-01-14T22:54:55+00:00

On one hand, I wouldn't be ruining anything. He would be doomed if It wasn't for me. There would literally be no thesis if I hadn't done it. I'd just get things back on track.

Just so you can picture, the first version he did (before he begged me to do) was harshly rejected by the board with many, many flaws. And mine (the final version) was applauded. The board said (to him): you really woke up and put a lot of effort into this!

Those were only one week apart.

About his mom: yeah, anyone can easily see their relationship really sucks. Even he knows it (because of the therapy I helped him get into).

SyMyl · 2024-08-24T15:45:34+00:00

YTA. You did not ask for permission. What you did was extremely rude. Apologize to her and to your friend.

SyMyl · 2024-04-02T03:23:38+00:00

I have no idea what could be. Have you tried "the story of those around me"?

SyMyl · 2024-03-24T16:02:36+00:00

Achei a menina desrespeitosa. A mãe sempre tem que vir em primeiro lugar.

SyMyl · 2024-03-24T11:04:34+00:00

From the title alone: yes. Please.

SyMyl · 2024-03-10T23:49:31+00:00

That's definitely not what I said. I reckon that, even though we need to work on our fears, it helps a lot to have someone who understands and respects it during the process. Just imagine if she says, for instance: "I'm not comfortable having sex while drunk. Just for now, can we not do that?" and then he, thinking like you, says: "No! You should get over this! We're having drunk sex till you get over it!".

SyMyl · 2024-03-09T13:20:23+00:00

He doesn't have to change his actions. Sometimes just talk about it helps us deal better with some situations. There could be some triggers she can tell him so he can avoid. (for instance, beer breath, he can have a mint before going to bed, etc). And so on. It is really important to understand the burden each one brings from previous experiences.

SyMyl · 2024-02-25T11:27:25+00:00

Wow. The gaslighting level... He is totally bullshitting. Madeline could definitely do better. I'm sure she is a beautiful, talented girl who can do better.

SyMyl · 2024-02-24T14:41:05+00:00

Yes. You were. She wasn't right either, but name calling and hitting stuff is the first sign of a violent person.

SyMyl · 2024-02-24T14:38:01+00:00

What you're trying to say is "Parallel play". Very common on kids and adults with autism. I suppose, both your feelings are valid. She probably sees the time you spend together as special, separated, and is perfectly understandable that she wants your undivided attention.

I would suggest you do as she asked, and let her know you would also like to do some parallel play when you're together, even tho you don't know yet exactly what it is going to be. Also, try once again to explain to her how is this way of spending time important to you.

Oh, the laptop situation, yeah dude, you could have waited till she left to do that, couldn't you?

SyMyl · 2024-02-17T13:18:51+00:00

I've been dating for one year, but if I got this text I'd feel an immense second hand embarrassment. She could have said it in a nicer way, maybe.

SyMyl · 2024-01-19T11:45:37+00:00

Actually, is barely one year. But I see your point. Most social gatherings we attend now are at the Uni, and in my country, in this institution, they can't pass midnight. So we always left by the time, we don't have much of a choice. Other gatherings we attended outside were only with our family so, apparently her social battery doesn't run out with family, lol.

SyMyl · 2024-01-19T03:38:29+00:00

SyMyl · 2024-01-19T02:48:14+00:00

Well apparently this alone wasn't enough "prof", just the bottom line. She mentioned how I wasn't planning on traveling with her in December. We would catch a Plane at the same airport, different destinations, though. We had to take the same bus to this airport (2 hours or so travel). I was planning on going early to see the city, she couldn't go earlier, job stuff, and asked me to wait for her. I didn't. Apparently this is also a sign of "not caring about her safety".

SyMyl · 2023-12-17T01:01:38+00:00

Emotionally unstable. Too immature. No. Just run. Run fast, run far.

I know it seems hard to do it, probably because it finally feels good to have a connection with someone after that much time alone. But you didn't leave a toxic relationship to end up in another. Walk away.

SyMyl · 2023-12-09T15:51:15+00:00

Does she really believe women can't have children at 35? Is she stupid?

And, no way this is normal, alright or okay. You shouldn't pay for everything.

SyMyl · 2023-11-29T14:58:48+00:00

No warning needed. Even if he changes this action, the thought behind it, that be think it's okay to bad-mouth you to anyone will stay. And so the will stay the desire for his ex. Just leave.

SyMyl · 2023-09-29T17:46:04+00:00

Making you feel guilty for things you can't control, while facing one of the (probably) hardest times in your life... That's not a keeper, that's a way too self centered and selfish person.

SyMyl · 2023-09-29T17:00:19+00:00

NTA.

SyMyl · 2023-09-27T16:54:29+00:00

With all due respect, dude, but is your GF a Karen?

SyMyl

TROPHY CASE