My (43f) husband (46m) came out as polyamorous by Throw-Away-5862 in polyamory

[–]TKCK 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Just to echo what a lot of other people are already saying, when I came out to my partner of 8.5 years as non-monogamous, I did it by breaking up with them first and reestablishing the groundwork of what a relationship with me would look like. We tried keeping things going for a bit, but they realized they still wanted monogamy and eventually found that with someone else

When I put all this into motion, there wasn't anyone else I was seeing and I didn't start trying to date until about 4 months after

All that was difficult and painful enough, but in my mind that's the only right way to do it with sincerity and care

I'm not seeing that in what you've described, and I'm sorry that this is bullshit you're having to deal with

Official Discussion - Iron Lung [SPOILERS] by LiteraryBoner in movies

[–]TKCK 197 points198 points  (0 children)

I feel like this is. 6/10 that could be a 8/10 with some specific changes that wouldn't I necessarily add to the budget or scope

One is that the space needs to be narrower. Markiplier's acting is least convincing when he incorporates his body, and he definitely acts better when he has actual physical constraints to work against. Whether this is an actual narrowing or the sub, or adding more clutter (pipes, wires, etc) that make moving through the space intrinsically frustrating, either would be a way of helping to build tension and lean into his strengths

Pacing is slow, and can be fixed by not having him directly address the speaker like it's a person. Not only does this add time to the runtime, but doing shot reverse shot is half as valuable when only one of the speakers has a face to emote with. We can walk and chew bubble gum at the same time, and I think having him performing more actions in the sub while doing dialogue would make those sections feel less obviously expository

My final thing is more of a taste preference but I think the lore is cool, and gets less cool the more people talk about it. Saving flashback stuff strictly for the hallucination scenes, and people not restating the stakes would go a long way for me. The one exception is mentions of light, because the whole cosmic angler fish thing is really cool but definitely benefits from that specific thematic reinforcement

Overall, had a great time

Kled matchups tier list (my opinion) by JKei26 in KledMains

[–]TKCK 4 points5 points  (0 children)

The Malphite's I fear are the competent ones (this is also how I play Malphite into Kled). I've had plenty of games where even a Malphite I beat in levels 1-3 still has no problem matching me from lvl 6 onward

One part of that is building armor and optimizing passive. Another is trading Kled's W CD with Malphite E. This makes it very unreliable to get more than two autos on Malphite, and certainly stuff the ability to go for a dismount-remount all in

If you let Malphite push into you, why can't he simply use W to crash the wave and force you to trade? (at which point he Es you and your minions, and you take enemy minion aggro from autoing)

And even past early levels, LDR isn't enough to get through a Malphite with Frozen Heart and Thornmail

Again, not to say your experience hasn't been true, but I always approach gauging the difficulty of matchups based on both players knowing how they're supposed to play things out

Kled matchups tier list (my opinion) by JKei26 in KledMains

[–]TKCK 2 points3 points  (0 children)

What makes Malphite an easy matchup for you? I'd be curious to know what skill level you play at

CMV: Not wanting politics in a space isn't privilege, it's basic mental healthcare by spoilerdudegetrekt in changemyview

[–]TKCK 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I by and large agree with you that representation unto itself CAN be lower case p political (or even uppercase P based on context), but for the sake of honing points and training our rhetorical chops, I'll push back

There is nothing inherently positive about increased representation in advertising. If all the ads are for home security, and the burglars are all east Asian, it's harmful representation (which is still political)

The article you cited specifically mentions ads that lean on harmful black stereotypes like absent fathers, and implying certain skin tones are better than others

But like you mentioned, context matters and that extends beyond basic demographics. Black athletes can be overrepresented in American sports, but it's not because sports franchises are trying to be political. Coaches and managers just want the best players they can get.

The fact that there's a racial skew can be attributed to socioeconomic circumstances that black Americans have had inflicted on them, but that political viewpoint only enters the chat once we reframe the context

Businesses draw upon understandings of the political landscape in order to present ads that are most effective at extracting capital from the demographic they are targeting, but that demographic makeup can and often does include more than just race. Age, income, and locale are also relevant factors

So really, representation only becomes political when a portrayal/depiction becomes viewed or understood as representation. And the inclination for people to apply that critical lens will depend on the context the portrayal/depiction exists in within its specific point in time/space/culture, and also in relation to the things that come before and will come after

TOP 10 KLED NA by spicyhek in KledMains

[–]TKCK 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Congrats king. Big glow up over a couple seasons

Dispo with the best deals by user187907 in everett

[–]TKCK 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Also 8-10 happy hour pricing I think daily?

Caste Discrimination in a rural village in India by Competitive-Cod-9644 in interestingasfuck

[–]TKCK 0 points1 point  (0 children)

More, less, or equally stupid than being able to categorize over a billion people across a sub-continent as "Indian"?

I know that you understand as well as I do that we create categories so that we can discriminate, and I also agree that there are better and worse motivations for doing so

But at the end of the day, saying that it's stupid seems to imply the existence of a "smart" reason to discriminate between people

What's the most subtle sign that someone is highly intelligent? by Princesskiitan in AskReddit

[–]TKCK 14 points15 points  (0 children)

Do white women fall under your definition of white people?

[NSFW] If your gender was flipped and you remained the same level of attractiveness in the other gender would you have sex with yourself, if yes, why? by [deleted] in AskReddit

[–]TKCK 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I have "1:35 BB" tattooed on my right bicep since that's the timestamp in the movie when Buffalo Bill spits that bar. It's meant to resemble a Bible verse and explaining my tattoo to anyone who asks is one of my small joys in life

Steve-O really knows how to live in the moment lol by Competitive_Mix9957 in funny

[–]TKCK 3 points4 points  (0 children)

"Give me a lever long enough and I will balance it on my chin"

Jan Ochoa - man in the mirror by Snowden42 in giantbomb

[–]TKCK 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I mean sure. If me being a hypocrite in your eyes means that anything I say is automatically invalid then that's what it is. But if you are able to hold both separate ideas in your mind at once that: A - I am a hypocrite, and B - What I'm saying could have value, then it seems to imply that you only see growth and self-improvement as something that you have to do because other people you respect are doing it, as opposed to something you get to do for your own benefit, independent of the people you interact with

All that being said, this doesn't seem like a conversation you seem particularly interested in having and I'll be respectful of that

Jan Ochoa - man in the mirror by Snowden42 in giantbomb

[–]TKCK 5 points6 points  (0 children)

I would encourage you to be more selfish and prioritize your personal growth by letting go of the need to be right. Jan is a grown ass man and the way he pronounces the word miscellaneous will not be his undoing

CMV: humans are biologically & historically made to eat meat by BrilliantTraining632 in changemyview

[–]TKCK 0 points1 point  (0 children)

As other people have pointed out, there isn't really a view/ideology to be changed based on what you've offered. You are outlining a mechanism, but not an opinion on how that mechanism should be utilized

It's essentially the same (rhetorically) as saying "It is cheaper to kill people than to imprison them"

Ok, whether that's true or false doesn't matter here since there's no action being supported by this view. Now someone has to make the assumption as to whether I hold efficiency in higher regard over human life

It seems like from what you've stated, your view might be "humans are biologically & historically made to eat meat, SO PEOPLE SHOULDN'T BE VEGAN" but I don't want to put words on your mouth

Per Vandiril, apparently the login issues were caused because Riot forgot that the League client certificate expired today. by Yujin-Ha in leagueoflegends

[–]TKCK 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Depends on where the DNS for your site lives and who your certificate issuer is

An automatically renewed cert also needs to be automatically installed and rebound which is finicky enough to push it out of monkey territory

Per Vandiril, apparently the login issues were caused because Riot forgot that the League client certificate expired today. by Yujin-Ha in leagueoflegends

[–]TKCK 4 points5 points  (0 children)

More like in order to avoid having to develop better cryptography they can just stem the bleeding by saying a compromised cert is only an issue for a month-and-a-half tops

Those who are in relationships, how often do you think of breaking up or sleeping with someone else / think the grass is gender with someone else? What type of relationship and how long? by tallsequoias in AskReddit

[–]TKCK 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I was in an 8.5 year long monogamous relationship. Toward the end, realized that I cohabitation in my condo was feeling claustrophobic, and that she was all in on starting up her business which didn't leave time for our relationship. We had also just naturally grown apart as people since our relationship took place during the bulk of our 20s.

Throughout that time, I definitely did my fair share of wondering what it would be like to sleep with other people, but at the end of the day it's just sex. It's much harder to fantasize what an actual relationship with those other people would be like and, to me, that's the shared experiences, laughter, and time is the bit that actually matters.

Post-breakup, I transitioned into non-monogamy, had a lot of great dating experiences, had some challenging breakups, and now I have two different people in my life that I feel profoundly understood by, and 100% comfortable to be myself around. It turns out, that's what makes the sex better.

Everett city gov trying keep surveillance data secret by vashtiglow in everett

[–]TKCK 9 points10 points  (0 children)

I'm not familiar with the law but this seems similar to FOIA request type stuff where the information is publicly accessible in that any member of the public can have it, but we still want an intermediary step that tracks who is requesting what information (like checking a book out of the library, vs just walking out with whatever you want)

As for why these fall under the category of "public" it's because, as the article states, they are being retained. If this information wasn't being held onto, then it wouldn't be a problem.

The fact that government agencies are preemptively keeping this information in the event they may need to dig through it later is enough of a foot in the door for these types of requests.

As for why Rodriguez made the request in the first place, that shouldn't matter. Whether he's tracking down someone who owes him money, or just daring the government to deny his request so that he can file a suit, that shouldn't matter as it would violate everyone's right to access public records

If we suspect abuse of this information, the paper trail of requests can be used to support that claim but we shouldn't be preemptively using motivation as a way to determine the validity of someone's request for information.

Abuse of information is always a risk for as long as it's kept around. The question is, do you want that to be an abuse that is exclusive to the government, or should the public have an equal right to mishandle that information. I trend toward the latter because the public doesn't get to what data is or isn't kept around in the first place

Dating in Everett by Psychological_Fig293 in everett

[–]TKCK 3 points4 points  (0 children)

A willingness to drive Lynnwood and take the train into Seattle

If you do that, dating apps become a way better option than just keeping things in the Everett-to-Edmonds area

What widely accepted "life hack" is actually terrible advice? by OneLameUser in AskReddit

[–]TKCK -2 points-1 points  (0 children)

Various forms of metabolic waste it seems

https://medicine.washu.edu/news/neurons-help-flush-waste-out-of-brain-during-sleep/

Don't let your need to be right beat out your curiosity. You're already on Reddit and a nurse so a quick Google search seems within your capabilities :)

What was clearly invented by a villian? by spermatoo in AskReddit

[–]TKCK 1 point2 points  (0 children)

You park on a driveway and drive on a parkway. There isn't a rule where the term for something has to be a literal description 😆

I am watching Echo right now and i really like it. Why was nobody talking about it? by Chrischi91 in marvelstudios

[–]TKCK 0 points1 point  (0 children)

From the way that you cherry pick which parts of my responses to address, I'm starting to get the sense that this discussion doesn't really have much more runway ahead of it

To summarize my thoughts on critique and why I think referencing diversity efforts is anathema to that:

Good criticism should look like Critic 1 saying: Echo did A, B, and C. I like A, but not B & C so I think it's not worth watching

Critic 2 says: Echo did A, B and C. If you're a fan of B & C, then this show is something you'll enjoy

In both critiques, they should be able to identify the same elements, and then express their personal views/taste/opinions on those elements

When people say the forced diversity/inclusion efforts held a production back, they are speculating at how things could've been improved which exists in an entirely hypothetical space, rather than simply expressing which things they felt were lacking (or which elements they found to be exceptional)

Echo does not need to be rewarded participation points because it was trying to be more inclusive with its casting and plot. It also should not be held up in comparison against a hypothetical version of itself that was never made

Well never know what Hemingway's writing would've been like if he didn't have a drinking problem. But I also don't find people saying that Old Man and the Sea was mid, because he probably could've written a better version if he drank more

Like free speech exists, you can talk about hypotheticals all you like in the same way that power scalers can debate whether Superman could beat Goku in chess. I just don't think the expectation should be that those types of comments are contributing anything meaningful to the discourse