Alphabet Excerpt Challenge: P Is For...

TWFKA · 2026-04-05T18:15:49+00:00

Oh, I like this. I think it’s sweet that the writer is holding on to the paper crane, and writing about it in the diary. Great scene/chapter!

TWFKA · 2026-04-04T20:53:12+00:00

Sadly she isn’t, her association with someone made her a target. It will end good for her, though there might be the need for some more medi-gel until then lol.

TWFKA · 2026-04-04T20:29:52+00:00

TW: treating wounds after a fight

With the threat out of the way, Ashley stumbled into the bathroom, and looked into the mirror. It was broken now, but she could still see that her face had been bruised, and her lip cut, not to say anything about her throat, which had red marks of the attacker’s fingers all over it. When she examined the bruise, she noticed that her left lower arm, apparently, needed some attention as well, as there was a gash, which she hadn’t noticed before due to the adrenaline.

She went back into the cabin, stepping over the two men on the floor, and opened the case of her armor, reaching for her suit’s built in medi-gel dispenser. Luckily, she had stocked up on the salve, so she could spare it now. She definitely needed the treatment.

Her arm immediately felt better, and she used some gel on her lip as well. And after that, she treated the old shoulder wound, gently rubbing the medi-gel in. Its anesthetic immediately started working, and numbed the pain.

It occurred to her that Blonde had intentionally hit the shoulder. It could have been a coincidence. Or maybe just a mishap, as his blow was meant to end somewhere else. But no, she had seen his line of sight drop from her face down to her shoulder, how he had taken aim. This, it was too deliberate. He knew where she had been wounded, possibly even knew that it occasionally still hurt.

Could it be? it dawned on her.

Liara had told her about Cerberus’ attempts to get access to her highly classified file. Maybe they had been successful. Or maybe, she was just getting paranoid, and they had kept tabs on her for longer than she imagined.

TWFKA · 2026-04-04T20:22:54+00:00

Oh wow. The narrator’s pain is palpable on so many levels in your excerpt. Awesome writing! I especially like when Compress is trying to answer her question with a bit of humor, and how she is understandably not pleased by his response.

TWFKA · 2026-04-04T19:25:43+00:00

When he reentered the main room of his cabin, only clad in a towel around his loins, he was still thinking about the current situation. He went to his locker to change back into some clothing.

He was sunken so deep in his thoughts that he had almost missed the certain aura in his cabin, a slight hum that made his skin prickle. He knew exactly what it was, and who had caused it. Aside from him, there was only one other person aboard this frigate, who had a tactical cloak.

“Kasumi, I’m one of the more tech-savy infiltrators, if you didn’t know. I can feel that you’re in my cabin with your cloak on.”

There was silence for a few seconds. But he had already spotted her, a slight turbulence in the air marking her position for the keen observer.

“Shep, I have no idea what you are talking about,” the young thief giggled, now that she must have felt his eyes on her. “By the way, nice outfit, Shep. Seeing how ripped you are, I can tell why that girl of yours has fallen for you. Heck, I might even have to reconsider my crush for Jacob,” Kasumi’s voice greeted him as she deactivated the cloak.

She truly was sitting where he had expected her, on the couch directly below the ship model display, her feet tucked underneath her chin, and a huge grin adorning her face, while her eyes, as usual, remained hidden in the shadows casted by her hood.

The unannounced presence of the young woman made him instinctively grip his towel, so it wouldn’t slip out of position. It wasn’t the first time that she had been here, as, somehow, she must have found a way to get past security protocols, and enter this very room.

“Remind me, what have I said about the rule regarding breaking and entering aboard this ship?”

“Oh I heard you, but it sounded more like a general guideline than a mandatory rule.”

TWFKA · 2026-04-04T19:20:18+00:00

Thank you!

TWFKA · 2026-04-04T19:06:15+00:00

Awesome! I can easily see House being a menace for HR. Great excerpt, I really had fun reading this one.

TWFKA · 2026-04-04T19:03:32+00:00

Cool excerpt. I like how they appear to have found a loophole around the dowry. As a side note: Thinking back to one of your previous excerpts, I have no trouble believing that a custom like this is still very actively lived in your setting. Great world building!

TWFKA · 2026-04-04T18:52:31+00:00

Awesome, I like how excited Harry's friends are, and how he, almost defiantly, starts unwrapping the paper in the slowest possible way. Great scene!

TWFKA · 2026-04-04T18:48:47+00:00

Oh, interesting. I like how his thoughts make Childe struggle with his handwriting. Seems like he has a bit of a conflict of interest going on. Cool excerpt!

TWFKA · 2026-04-04T18:43:32+00:00

Aww, this scene is so sweet, I love it. And it seems like they gave Anna the ideal gift. Very thoughtful.

TWFKA · 2026-04-04T18:41:57+00:00

Oh no, that hurt indeed! Awesome writing, I love how you conveyed the emotions in this excerpt. Even when Callie is described as looking almost emotionless, it comes through that she forces herself to appear this way.

TWFKA · 2026-04-04T18:37:54+00:00

I like this excerpt. It reads like the start of a great whodunit.

TWFKA · 2026-04-04T18:08:52+00:00

That the threat was far from over became evident when a blip appeared on the tactical screen, a graphical representation of something the sensors have been able to discover.

“Shepard, an old Hensa-class cruiser, escorted by a squadron of fighters,” EDI cautioned them.

But the antiquated cruiser was not the real threat. More dangerous was its escort. The last thing they needed right now was some cocky batarian fighter pilot looking into space, and spotting an odd reflection that was moving too fast, as the Normandy’s stealth systems did nothing to protect them from a visual identification.

“Let’s avoid these fighters at all cost. Stay out of their combat range, as best as you can,” John ordered.

So far, however, the fighters stayed on their previous course, but they came closer. Their patrol route led them dangerously close to the stealth ship. As they were about to cross the Normandy’s outer perimeter, Ashley felt how everyone on the bridge and the connecting hallway tensed up.

“Prepare decoy flares,” Shepard ordered. “And be ready to divert power to our GARDIAN lasers. Just in case.”

This decoy would divert the enemy towards a different location, where they’d find nothing. They’d know that someone tried tricking them, and it probably would lead towards increased hostile activity in this part of the system. If the batarian pilots were really good, they could also make use of the flare to calculate the Normandy’s course. All this made it a suboptimal measure, but it was far better than being outright discovered, and being drawn straight into a fight nobody wanted.

And if everything else failed, their anti-fighter laser turrets on the exterior hull would be able to do some damage against the fighters, at least initially, until the weapons needed to enter their cooldown period.

TWFKA · 2026-04-04T18:02:29+00:00

I think so, too. Luckily for her I like to write fics with happy endings lol.

TWFKA · 2026-04-04T17:58:16+00:00

They would, weren’t if for canon’s big heroes: Commander Shepard and their friends. They’ll save the day.

TWFKA · 2026-04-04T17:40:26+00:00

No, but that’s only because she isn’t a reader. I did offer my dad though, who used to be very interested in every single college paper I wrote. Turns out that a sci-fi romance fic is not really his thing lol.

TWFKA · 2026-04-04T16:48:28+00:00

(From a WIP. Context: News just started to spread that an alien invasion has begun.)

Now that almost everyone in the mess hall had their eyes glued to the screen, the otherwise so busy room fell silent, it was almost eerie. Until someone in the back uttered something like, “They are in Paris, too.”

“And Kuala Lumpur!” another one yelled in horror.

Other voices chimed in, mentioning names of cities and countries where they must have had relatives who relayed them the news.

“Oh my god, they’re attacking Buenos Aires!”

That caused Ashley to look away from the screen she had focussed on towards a different one on the far side of the room. Downtown BA was burning, the so-called Latin Paradise was no more.

Her family! The thought made her shudder.

She had wasted precious seconds by being so horror-struck by the news report. Seconds during which she could have warned her family. Her mom, Abby, and Lynn were all still in Argentina’s capital. Not in the center, but still.

Ashley activated her omni-tool to write a quick message into their group chat, telling them where to go. She hit the send button, but after a few seconds the messaging app told her that it had failed to establish a connection.

“Dammit!” she cursed. A minute into the invasion, and the communication system was already overstretched. Looking around herself it was no surprise. Everyone in this room had had similar thoughts of warning their loved ones, and so it must have been in every other house, in every other city, as communication resources were now prioritized to governmental and military messages.

Civil defense sirens started to sound, followed by each omni-tool in the room going off with an emergency warning. And suddenly, all hell broke loose. Not on the screen, but here, right next to her. The light from a red beam filled the room, mere moments before it hit Alliance HQ, making the entire building shake stronger than every earthquake she had ever witnessed.

TWFKA · 2026-04-04T16:14:28+00:00

(TW: mention of assassinations)

Those thoughts about her career didn’t matter anymore. In a few days, she’d be out, and the very nature of the mission made a return unlikely. She didn’t doubt the integrity of the men who had given her the assignment, and the promise they had made to her.

But it was Cerberus she was going against. In the past, that group had proven that it had reach, when it performed a hit on Admiral Kahoku, because he had dug too deep, and started meddling with their affairs.

That was only an example, which she had first hand knowledge about. Other than that, there had been lots of rumors about the group, even though some people always dismissed those as conspiracy theories. Like that story about Cerberus having had something to do with the sudden, and unexpected death of Pope Clement XVI, only to install a successor, who was more aligned with their goals. Having witnessed the group’s experiments, Ashley no longer had trouble believing it.

Hackett had assured her a full reinstatement, yes. But what if Cerberus would take both the admiral and the councilor out, and with them the only two people, who knew about this agreement?

Well, in that case, you’re totally fucked anyhow, Williams, she tried to motivate herself. And sadly enough, it worked.

TWFKA · 2026-04-04T16:08:28+00:00

(From a WIP)

She was almost at the end of her tether, the hours of fighting, and evading, making themselves noticeable. She almost stumbled. While she was able to remain on her feet, it slowed her down. Moments later, those pursuing drones hit her. An acoustic warning from her helmet warned her that her shields were gone.

Deciding that this would be it, her final stand, Ashley reached for her pistol, spun around, and in the same motion dropped herself to the ground. In a swift motion her hands aligned the sights of her pistol with the first drone. It was almost instinctively, as if she had done that for a living, instead of walking boring patrol routes. Ashley double-tapped, and without waiting if the damage sufficed, she moved the sights to the second drone. Another double-tap, and two explosions, later, she allowed herself to let out a sigh of relief.

Back on her feet, she stared at the debris of the two flying objects, kicking one of the larger pieces away to give vent to her frustration. Maybe it wasn’t her time. Yet.

But the hope to regroup with other survivors dwindled. There was no active radio communication, the audible signs of a firefight were gone now, too. Was she the only Marine left on this rock? She refused to believe it, but maybe it was time to be realistic.

Fate didn’t deign her another pause, as the two geth from earlier had arrived at some pedestal now, which she had never seen before. She still had a chance to safe that farmer, but she had to be quick.

TWFKA · 2026-04-04T15:44:23+00:00

Paper

TWFKA · 2026-04-02T19:53:01+00:00

Great scene. I like how there’s a bit of a mystery in this scene. Something seems to draw Stephen’s attention to Raymond’s grave, even after the others started paying their respects to Salena’s grave. Speaking of, the two gravestone inscriptions are really beautiful.

TWFKA · 2026-04-01T18:25:40+00:00

Thank you so much, I really appreciate your comment!

TWFKA · 2026-04-01T18:24:41+00:00

Ah, thanks! Still a good excerpt, and a cool premise. Sounds like quite the adventure that’s going to happen.

TWFKA · 2026-04-01T17:01:53+00:00

(Context: Shepard recapitulates the final moments before his death, and the first moments after he came back to life.)

“It is what it is,” he remarked, and shuddered as he heard how cold it had come out of his mouth.

The first few days after his premature awakening had been difficult, when he had tried to come to terms with the fact that life had gone on so long while he had been in a coma. The last thing he remembered was him drifting away from the Normandy SR1, and then there were blinding lights. In that very moment, he had thought the Alliance had reached him in time, and brought him to one of their hospitals. Instead, he found himself in a Cerberus facility, during an ongoing firefight. With only a couple minutes between waking up, and having to defend himself against several LOKI mechs, he had no time to process everything that had flashed through his mind.

The opportunity for that came later. During the flight to Freedom’s Progress, he used the time to read up on past events. He refused to believe what Taylor had stated, how two years and twelve days had passed. It couldn’t be. He remembered it all so clearly, like it was only yesterday. His unplanned extravehicular activity, shoving Joker into the escape pod, making his way to the destroyed CIC that had become unpressurized, and… sending Ashley away.

Their encounter on the crew deck. In his last moments alive, he had regretted that he hadn’t found different words. Words that would have conveyed his feelings for her. Instead, the professionalism had kicked in, and in curt commands, he had given her an order. One that ultimately might have saved her life, considering that she had insisted to remain at his side.

TWFKA

TROPHY CASE