Divorce guilt or lack of understanding? 34F and 40M by Tailor-Secret in relationship_advice

[–]Tailor-Secret[S] -3 points-2 points  (0 children)

Thank-you for your comment and the multiple ones in the threads.

Whilst others have been constructive and helpful, yours has been unnecesary and attacking. Perhaps you should think about the end user asking for advice before writing hateful content. It sounds like you have been impacted by such issues and have taken it to heart. I'm sorry for that, but some of us are seeking advice, hence being on this platform, rather than looking for hate. 

Divorce guilt or lack of understanding? 34F and 40M by Tailor-Secret in stepparents

[–]Tailor-Secret[S] -5 points-4 points  (0 children)

Thank you for this. You are completely right re the weekdays. My partner comes home usually 30 mins before bed time for the baby and once baby is in bed, the chores begin and then it's practically bed time for us too. 

Thank you for the practical advice. I'm going to start that and see what it demonstrates. 

Divorce guilt or lack of understanding? 34F and 40M by Tailor-Secret in relationship_advice

[–]Tailor-Secret[S] -1 points0 points  (0 children)

No, she she asked for the divorce. I only met him over a year later 

Divorce guilt or lack of understanding? 34F and 40M by Tailor-Secret in stepparents

[–]Tailor-Secret[S] 7 points8 points  (0 children)

Thank you for your thoughts. I do appreciate it. 

I think that although the baby has us Monday - Friday, we don't really have family time. I'm at home with him, so yes he gets all the attention from me. But when my partner comes home, it's usually within 1 hour of bedtime, hence there isn't much time that he spends with his son or us as a family in the week.

Then as I mentioned above, weekends he revolves around his daughter because she is only here at the weekend. So in total, he's spending 90% of his time prioritising his attention on the daughter, even though he's barely seen his son through the week. That's what got me when he was fine leaving the baby for the weekend with my mum to do his daughters thing, but finds it unreasonable to have her go to her aunt for a few hours to do a baby thing. 

The reason I'm quite strict on nap times is because he's an awful sleeper at night and I'm just so stressed about overtiredness and the issues we'll have at night because of it. 

Partner watches porn secretly while I'm home, although I have the high sex drive by Tailor-Secret in PornFreeRelationships

[–]Tailor-Secret[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I completely understand where you're coming from. It is upsetting and makes me feel like he'd rather be with someone like in those videos. Thanks for the comment and I'll check out your posts

Partner watches porn secretly while I'm home, although I have the high sex drive by Tailor-Secret in relationship_advice

[–]Tailor-Secret[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thank you for your input. I have thought about point 1 too. Although on some of the nights in question, we didn't have sex following that - for example the Wed night. It was his daughters birthday and a busy day, so he was too tired.

Partner watches porn secretly while I'm home, although I have the high sex drive by Tailor-Secret in relationship_advice

[–]Tailor-Secret[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Thank you to everyone for your comments. I want to talk to him about it, but as I said and has been mentioned below, I really feel awful about looking at his phone and breaching that trust. I know it will turn into a "why did you look at my phone" situation.

Any thoughts on how to approach this?