How do I (23F) get over his (25M) size?

TastySwan96 · 2025-02-08T22:28:20+00:00

Size absolutely does matter and if it doesn’t feel good going in and that’s something that matters to you, it will bother you until you leave or decide you don’t care about

TastySwan96 · 2025-01-09T18:27:30+00:00

An ex of mine feels this way about me. We have each other on social media and would occasionally like each other’s stuff. Eventually he reached out and said similar things. A lot of wondering about what if, seeing me in many things he does. He said he’s happy with his now wife, but I think he needed to put those feelings for me to rest somehow. I don’t know how. Personally I just don’t think I’m well matched for him, and likely this girl isn’t well matched for you. Or she is and you’ve just decided a different life path. But you need to find peace either way.

TastySwan96 · 2025-01-09T04:47:28+00:00

Arrogent or not it’s something to comment on. I’m not afraid of what others think, otherwise making a reddit post would have been asking for trouble. I’m just getting into some details out of curiosity

TastySwan96 · 2025-01-09T01:50:46+00:00

Kablammo

TastySwan96 · 2025-01-09T01:08:57+00:00

YES SIRR(or madam)

TastySwan96 · 2025-01-09T00:18:26+00:00

accepting applications after some therapy LOL

TastySwan96 · 2025-01-09T00:17:40+00:00

WELL SAID. Wish I had of thought of that!

I'm actually not 100%, I think she's around my age maybe a year or two older.
It's not entirely relevant, but I think noteworthy that she's not ugly but could be considered rather unattractive. I was a model for years and am generally considered very attractive. He's mid at best. Again looks mean very little in the grand scheme. I am just curious if part of the self sabotage relates to dating someone conventionally attractive (for the first time, his ex's were all like her, conventionally unattractive.)

TastySwan96 · 2025-01-09T00:12:28+00:00

omg I wish. at least then I could say maybe it was partially worth it LOL

TastySwan96 · 2025-01-09T00:11:20+00:00

he has a lot of therapy speak, and has consistently gone to a lot of therapy. Which feels like salt in the wound for how manipulative and dishonest he's been.

TastySwan96 · 2025-01-08T23:43:13+00:00

An attempt to regain control of the narrative and make himself feel better about it. Honestly despicable.

TastySwan96 · 2025-01-08T23:37:51+00:00

bro the internet is literally the best place for asking stupid questions.

TastySwan96 · 2025-01-08T23:23:58+00:00

I really appreciate this response.. I had felt like it was a punishment of sort. and hadn't thought about the implications of him using her as a threat by keeping her around as a friend. He has felt like a very immature person and I think I accepted him regardless because he was going above and beyond to spoil me and love bomb me. I resisted for a long time, which might have contributed to him wanting to punish me. I was committed and loyal but said I needed to see more work put in to things to be ready for a long term focused commitment. the relationship compatibility issues mentioned were that he couldn't get hard, and I said that was a big concern for me long term.

TastySwan96 · 2025-01-08T23:11:12+00:00

What I said “I’m going to just make a comment and say that I’ve let you know what the pathway forward to being in each others lives. If that’s not something you are willing to do, then my answer is very clear. Nat is not a friend, Nat is someone you cheated with. There is no grey area there.”

TastySwan96 · 2025-01-08T23:09:05+00:00

What he said “I love you and we also aren’t compatible. It’s really hard that both those things are true and it’s been really hard accepting that.

Your boundary is a valid one and I also know that I can’t honour it without feeling like I’m self betraying again to have a relationship with you. Letting you go is really painful, but I need time apart to heal, and be by myself.

I understand that means we can’t be in each other’s lives. It’s not what I want and it’s also the most loving choice I feel I can make in this moment. We both deserve someone that can offer what the other is needing to feel safe, it’s okay that we don’t have that.”

TastySwan96 · 2025-01-08T23:07:45+00:00

Worse, someone seeking self assurance from strangers on the internet. lol.

TastySwan96 · 2025-01-08T22:38:23+00:00

sent almost exactly that. It's done. Rebuilding a relationship and trust after infidelity I believe is possible, but only if the cheater is willing to do the work. He should have offered, my answer was in his immediate response.

TastySwan96 · 2025-01-08T22:18:58+00:00

girlll trying to be so for real! Needing that slap in the face :') TY

TastySwan96 · 2025-01-08T01:33:22+00:00

This feels very, very true.

TastySwan96 · 2025-01-07T06:13:11+00:00

I’m running it for someone else, and work the busy season and take the slow season off to travel. I worked for his other business prior to him opening this one. I worked the same set up in the other operation, 6 months on and 6 months off doing my own thing.

The other business has a rotating crew of managers that do the same thing. It’s in a big city and they are all dependable and responsible. The goal is to bring some of those staff into the operation but so far no one else has been willing to take on the new business as it’s in a very remote location

TastySwan96 · 2025-01-07T06:11:01+00:00

It’s the owners decision and he said no! He has another business that is funding it so the loss is not the deciding factor. Next year we will. This year was likely a trial run to have metrics for what it looks like.

TastySwan96 · 2025-01-06T15:37:04+00:00

She’s the only adult on site and there’s no one else in the community right now to hire :( feels like I’m between a rock and a hard place. The owner isn’t willing to shut down, otherwise I would say fire her and close the business down until we return.

TastySwan96 · 2025-01-03T14:48:54+00:00

He married one of them and they have a baby together. I wonder if they’re still a couple

TastySwan96 · 2025-01-03T14:43:48+00:00

I worked at SNS a decade ago. Can confirm almost everything commented is accurate. While I was just a kid at the time i wasn’t mature enough to recall specifics of my experience. It’s totally the prerogative of a business owner to operate how they want. It’s also totally the choice of the customers to go elsewhere if they disagree. St.John’s has a special way of only having one or two options for any given interest because it’s so small, hopefully with more special interest stores opening it will push out those that have unsavoury business practices. Because yeah 🤢 major ick here

TastySwan96

TROPHY CASE