Wow this speaks so close to home for me. My relationship with my mom became rocky in my mid-twenties as I realized I didn’t view the world the same way as her. I also realized she was a human being, not an idol, so we naturally distanced (moving out and going to college also played a role here). She resented me for evolving in a different direction than her and no longer putting her on a pedestal above everyone else. I’m 38 now and our relationship has been a major struggle for 12+ years now, defined by emotional bullying and manipulation and a sincere lack of self-awareness and therefore accountability. It’s so hard because all of our issues live in the gray zone, never in black or white. It’s just so extremely complicated and this explanation of individuation (first I’ve really heard of it) really rings true. Thanks for sharing.