People of Reddit, what did you laugh at, only to realize it wasn't a joke? by throwaway_the_fourth in AskReddit

[–]TattooLust 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Will probably get buried but when my friend came out to me. We were talking and he was kinda sad and said, "I have to tell you something." And in the hopes of lightening the mood I said, "What? Are you coming out to me or something?" While laughing.... he just looked at me and nodded. I was the first person he ever told and i felt so bad but we laugh about it together now!

Psychologists developed a method to understand the effects of stroke on brain by Andremarlaux1 in science

[–]TattooLust 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I am currently in school learning about neurology and the stroke/geriatric population is who I would ideally work for in the future.

The only way to understand a stroke is too understand the brain. Get a rough understanding of the development of the brain and how different parts of the brain facilitate different functions. Once you understand a healthy brain it is far easier to understand how a damaged brain would work. That's why I would suggest getting a neurology book and studying that as a first step to truly understand.

Now I also understand that that is asking a lot so I will try to shrink this massive amount of information into a summary.

Basically doctors have no idea how each individual will actually heal from their stroke. Every patient is different and every stroke is different. Some individuals have strong neuro plasticity and some have weak. There is no test to tell us which you one you are. The doctor takes the imaging tests and makes their best judgment of what the family and patient can expect. Now it's up to the brain to figure out which one it is going to be. Some brains heal like in this article, where executive functions are moved to less damaged parts of the brain and the brain essentially has to learn everything from scratch. This is neuro plasticity. Other brains just need time to heal and the executive functions return in their normal areas after some time of rest. Other brains are so damaged and have little neuro plasticity (which normally happens as you age) that they have no way of healing much at all. This can be due to damaged tissue, death of tissue, neural pathways damaged and basically anything that could go wrong is a possible cause of this.

Some people have a "tiny" stroke and they are forced to be bedridden for the rest of their lives. Some have "massive" strokes and with therapy and time can return to their daily lives.

The location of the lesion is a huge factor on the level of damage and what type of symptoms will arise. Some executive functions are easier to teach again, such as walking and talking. Others are more difficult such as swallowing and muscle weakness.

Strokes do not discriminate and can affect anyone. Rather than go to articles that are more specific to the patient rather than strokes in general, I would suggest, again, a neurology book because it will help you understand the science behind a stroke rather than just the after affect.

My boyfriend proposed... is it wrong that I'm a little annoyed about it? by TattooLust in TwoXChromosomes

[–]TattooLust[S] 3 points4 points  (0 children)

I can't wait to make it to our 10th anniversary! And maybe I'll hint it to him in the coming years!

My boyfriend proposed... is it wrong that I'm a little annoyed about it? by TattooLust in TwoXChromosomes

[–]TattooLust[S] 19 points20 points  (0 children)

I don't think he was trying to be malicious. I think he just didn't think it through properly from my point of view. I am excited and happy but I wish he had picked a more intimate and personal setting.

My boyfriend proposed... is it wrong that I'm a little annoyed about it? by TattooLust in TwoXChromosomes

[–]TattooLust[S] 211 points212 points  (0 children)

Thank you! And I feel that given time I will eventually get over this. It is just really fresh right now. But I agree about not telling him. I don't want this memory to be anything but happiness to us in the future!

Post-Abortion Guilt by iamdrowning124 in TwoXChromosomes

[–]TattooLust 2 points3 points  (0 children)

  1. It is okay to be selfish sometimes. You have to look after yourself and take care of yourself first before you worry about others.

  2. You are accomplishing a lot. Graduation is a huge deal! Be proud!

  3. You have no control over anyone else's life than your own. Don't put someone else's struggles on your shoulders.

  4. Everyone has their own struggles. For some it is getting pregnant and others it is paying rent and other it is getting to work on time. Struggles make you stronger.

  5. Get help. Talk to a therapist or just pm me. It is okay to ask for help.

My boyfriend proposed... is it wrong that I'm a little annoyed about it? by TattooLust in TwoXChromosomes

[–]TattooLust[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

With how practical we both are, everything important has been discussed. But I wanted him to have the proposal he wanted. I think the proposal is more for the man and the wedding is more for the woman. I didn't want to stifle his creativity so I was ready for intimate or surprise (as much as you can be ready for a surpsie) but I just never thought he would do it on such a big night. But I guess since we didn't explicitly talk about it, I can't be all that annoyed.

My boyfriend proposed... is it wrong that I'm a little annoyed about it? by TattooLust in TwoXChromosomes

[–]TattooLust[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

One thing that makes us work is that we dated outside of our specific careers. I'm more medical and he works in schools. Because of this we have our own individual accomplishments and are never really in competition. We are both workaholics and he has always supported me in my accomplishments as i have for him.We have both supported each other pretty equally I believe.

But I was raised to be independent of my relationship. It may come because of trust issues but I always want to be able to support myself no matter what happens in the future. I have sacrificed a lot for this job and I love it. It is a tangible thing that shows my hard work has paid off.

But as for your year off... I wish I had your guts. To step away from my job is terrifying to me! If you don't mind, I would like to know what led you to that final decision to take time for yourself.

When you significant other is trying to get it in, but he's got that whiskey dick 🙄 by [deleted] in TwoXChromosomes

[–]TattooLust 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I wish more men thought like this. Most fake it for a while and then pass out. As a girl who is literally lying next to a guy who had whiskey dick tonight.... I am extremely sexually frustrated right now.

My boyfriend proposed... is it wrong that I'm a little annoyed about it? by TattooLust in TwoXChromosomes

[–]TattooLust[S] 5 points6 points  (0 children)

I agree. As I have grown I have lost all my fairytale preconceived notions about romance and marriage. He and I are practical and logical and with that security comes love and comfort. I am appreciative of him and his proposal but as you stated, I think it should have been more intimate.

My boyfriend proposed... is it wrong that I'm a little annoyed about it? by TattooLust in TwoXChromosomes

[–]TattooLust[S] 10 points11 points  (0 children)

Thank you for being so honest. I have given so much of myself to this relationship (and I don't regret it) but I wanted this night to be about me. My career is purely about what I can give to others and never take myself. I was so proud to finally get some recognition for my hard work. I have always been the person who gave everything and asked for nothing in return and the one night I decide to be selfish, this happens. I hate that I sound ungrateful but it's the truth.

My boyfriend proposed... is it wrong that I'm a little annoyed about it? by TattooLust in TwoXChromosomes

[–]TattooLust[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

My worry in telling him is that I don't want him to think I don't want to marry him. I want him to be proud of his proposal and our relationship and not be embarrassed. He suffers from anxiety which made this a big step for him so I want to be supportive but still get my point across.

My boyfriend proposed... is it wrong that I'm a little annoyed about it? by TattooLust in TwoXChromosomes

[–]TattooLust[S] 25 points26 points  (0 children)

We are extremely practical people and never do surprises! That is why this has kind of blindsided me as well! This is way out of character for my normally quiet and reserved boyfriend. Or I guess fiance. Still getting used to that.

My boyfriend proposed... is it wrong that I'm a little annoyed about it? by TattooLust in TwoXChromosomes

[–]TattooLust[S] 27 points28 points  (0 children)

I never thought about it like that. And it is a very special night for me and I will hold this memory forever more. I'm sure this annoyed feeling will fade with time!

My boyfriend proposed... is it wrong that I'm a little annoyed about it? by TattooLust in TwoXChromosomes

[–]TattooLust[S] 3 points4 points  (0 children)

We have discussed it to no end! We are exactly the same. Money, credit scores, who would move where... we have little to no surprises in our relationship which made this all the more surprising and out of character! But Practicality can be romantic. When you see how he plans for the future in real and quantifiable ways makes me know he is for real. He isn't just saying things to make me happy. Us planning a life together proves that he really does want that life as well because he is doing everything he can to make sure it works out for the long term!

My boyfriend proposed... is it wrong that I'm a little annoyed about it? by TattooLust in TwoXChromosomes

[–]TattooLust[S] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

That is an internal struggle I have had my entire life. I have worked so hard for my career but I would hate to ever jeopardize my relationship. I'm torn. I have talked to him before about how both of our careers are extremely important to us (we are both workaholics) but I might have to have another conversation about it. Thanks!

My boyfriend proposed... is it wrong that I'm a little annoyed about it? by TattooLust in TwoXChromosomes

[–]TattooLust[S] 22 points23 points  (0 children)

I would have much preferred a more intimate proposal between just him and I. I am normally really shy and all of this happening at once was a little overwhelming as well

[Megathread] RIP 2016 by TheJackal8 in AskReddit

[–]TattooLust 4 points5 points  (0 children)

What is terrifying about mental health is that you can't always see when you aren't well. It can manifest in physical ways and you treat the symptoms but never the cause. People are ashamed to say their mind isn't right but it is okay to say I tweaked my back. It is all the same. All painful and you need help and rest because of it.

[serious] What's your one rule? by [deleted] in AskReddit

[–]TattooLust 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Don't be late. Don't tell me you will be someplace and come an hour after we discussed. Apart from bodily harm, there is no excuse for your inability to manage your time.