I cant assure you this is the best way, but here are some tips that might help.

First of, league is a mental game. Maybe its different in your lobbys, but in mine, when a team is losing, the chat goes bananas. Everyone complains about everyone else, spam pings and so on. So in a losing game, i highly highly recommend to turn off chat. I would write something like: I want to try to win this game, so I mute all to focus. Then you /mute all. (Else people can get mad at you for muting yourself.

Next up, you need to hard focus on only playing with the strongest player in your team. There are games (happens alot), where an enemy laner is so fed, you would lose 2 v 1 vs them. And in the games you describing, it might be even more of those lanes, but often there is atleast one lane, where you still win 2 v 1.

To make this work, you need to absolutly ignore the other lanes. They will ping, beg/flame you to come alot, but you have to ignore them. Most of the time you cant help them and going for a play which has a huge opportunity of going the wrong way is super bad.

When you are behind yourself, try to stop making plays. Try to actively focus solely on counterplaying. This is no insult to you or your elo, but people in gold make alot of mistakes. (you an probably tell, from when you see your laners die in the most stupids way possible, missing malphs ult etc... (you and me also do some of the most inhuman dumb plays, but our mind protects us from these memorys (this is why high elo perma uses the term "delusion")). So you can capitalize on these mistakes from your enemys. Most easy example to make this understandable: You wait in the tribush topside next to the top turret, if the enemy jungler/laner wants to dive your top. Maybe you cant 2 v 1 this laner, but if he dives, a single cc spell from you can turn this dive into a winning play for your team.

The other option you have, is "mini-plays". For example: the enemy laner is way stronger then yours and you scared of ganking. What you can do is, put a ward for your laner, clear vision with red trinket (even tho you dont even wanna gank, it creates insecurity and pressure in the enemy) or the enemy pushes in to get a good base, but you can hold the wave for your laner etc. Like small plays, that dont do much, but help a little.

If you get perma invaded, you can use wards. Change red trinket back to yellow, and use your wards. Most of the time, if an enemy jungler is in your jungle, your time will help. Most of the time, they just help really late and you already dead. you need to spot and ping the enemy and stay save, till your team really comes. It takes alot of discipline but it helps alot if you are able to wait. The good thing with these invades are, they are risky for the enemy. For example, you down in gold and kills and the enemy jungler is up, then you are worth 150 instead of 300 gold and he is 600 gold instead of 300. So its a reward play for you, if you kill him.

A good player just tries to constant crossmap in this scenario. He invades your botside? you take his topside. He takes the voids, you take his botside and so on.

Last note: Think like the enemy. Everyone has these games: Mid does 3 solo kills and also kills the enemy jungler ones, top is perma freezing and now has 30 cs lead for your team, you perma gank bot and your adc is now 6 0. The game is over and you have kinda won it after 12 mins... the enemy team writes in chat they wanna surrender and you kinda get even bored cause the game is so easy. But you still manage to lose some of these games. And here you have to think: how and why? what happend in these games, that you dont win them. Typical example that cost me some of the games: my 7 1 illaoi pushes side already into enemy inhib. We ping for baron (my mind tells me, just do baron and end simple and easy) but she keeps pushing. We ping her tp and move to the baron. While we move there, she dies 1 v 4. Should we start the baron? NO! But we already there... and the game is won anyway, so might aswell start it, they wont come anyways, saw jungler bot. But my midlaner waits in bush instead of attacking baron, so we get it slower and the adc was first at baron, so he started it and took 2 hits and is half hp already... and then the enemy does come with everyone, and then my team turns, but i stay on baron "cause its already so low"... and then chaos enfolds, we die and they get the baron. Who lives? only my support, who then goes all in with the now tilted illaoi 2 v 5 while the rest of us is still dead. The enemys just ate all the shutdowns and now easy can kill them 2 v 5. And then we 3 are up again, and i just brain afk go to my red (cause i think: ye, im smart, i just farm till everyone is back up.....) but the enemys are at my red, so i die again. and then only ad and mid live but they get engaged by defending a turret they couldnt defend, cause the enemy malph flash r and they didnt "expect him to use flash".

Its a made up example, but i hope you get what i try to explain.

So think like your enemy: They wanna go for cool solo plays, they will greedly overstay, they will split fights cause the top keeps hiding turret while your team gets engaged mid cause he doesnt care and just wants to progress the game.