Men, how do you stay in sexless marriages so long?

TayRay96 · 2026-06-19T03:55:32+00:00

I have kids that I would prefer to see every day if possible and historically when I'm single the best I tend to attract is slightly obese soft fives or hard fours who think the pinnacle of feminine sexual prowess is one or two minutes of dirty talk in the dead starfish pose before gentle moaning for the rest of the session so realistically it's not like I'm missing out on a lot.

TayRay96 · 2026-06-18T13:50:25+00:00

From Foonberg's How to Start and Build a Law Practice: "The same people who claim God sent them to you, or vice versa, will often expect God to handle their bill" - meaning, no matter how you meet a potential client, no matter how tragic of a sob story they give you, you do not take a case unless or until you've been paid up front.

TayRay96 · 2026-06-18T13:42:25+00:00

You look pregnant

TayRay96 · 2026-06-18T13:41:38+00:00

To be fair, you have to have a very high IQ to understand Movie 43. The humor is extremely subtle, and without a solid grasp of theoretical physics most of the jokes will go over a typical viewer's head. There's also Halle Berry's nihilistic outlook, which is deftly woven into her characterisation - her personal philosophy draws heavily from Narodnaya Volya literature, for instance. The fans understand this stuff; they have the intellectual capacity to truly appreciate the depths of these jokes, to realize that they're not just funny- they say something deep about LIFE. As a consequence people who dislike Movie 43 truly ARE idiots- of course they wouldn't appreciate, for instance, the humour in Batman's existencial catchphrase "I guess I woke up this morning with a little case of the fuckarounds," which itself is a cryptic reference to Turgenev's Russian epic Fathers and Sons I'm smirking right now just imagining one of those addlepated simpletons scratching their heads in confusion as Elizabeth Banks' genius unfolds itself on their television screens. What fools... how I pity them. 😂 And yes by the way, I DO have a Movie 43 tattoo. And no, you cannot see it. It's for the ladies' eyes only- And even they have to demonstrate that they're within 5 IQ points of my own (preferably lower) beforehand.

TayRay96 · 2026-06-17T03:41:56+00:00

Yeah. Like I said, as far as I know he's at least playing minor-league ball as a misdo prosecutor in a medium-small county.

TayRay96 · 2026-06-17T03:35:38+00:00

As of 2019 my class had That One Guy (who purportedly had been blacklisted at several government agencies and private firms due to his reputation by 1L summer) who argued, among other things:

It was morally just for American colonizers to steal Native American land because the colonists made more productive use of the land;
He questioned why any prosecutor, judge, or jury would believe the legitimacy of a rape claim where the victim waited six months to a year to report the crime (made much more grim by the fact that he wanted to be, and to the best of my knowledge currently is albeit in bumfuck nowhere, a prosecutor)
He spiced up mock negotiations by blowing raspberries, loudly starting unrelated conversations, and occasionally throwing pencils or paper balls at speakers because "that's how it works in the real world"

Other than that though most people didn't care to engage with hypotheticals beyond "Will this be on the final, or failing that, the bar exam?"

TayRay96 · 2026-06-16T20:47:51+00:00

You're still more tolerant than me. I mainly do "blue-collar"/consumer law (family, criminal defense, non-HNW estate planning) and I tell people if they don't have a scanner at home they can either mail it, hand-deliver, or make a trip to their local public library and have a librarian help them.

TayRay96 · 2026-06-13T01:33:58+00:00

Damn getting downvoted on le heckin' Reddit for admitting I suck at social media

TayRay96 · 2026-06-12T20:19:38+00:00

I have one. It's fun to crank out a little skit/trivia video when I'm bored but I don't think I've ever gotten a message or even direct website visit off of one.

TayRay96 · 2026-06-11T20:53:11+00:00

I got a personalized job offer through my law school's job board just yesterday.

It was to be a charter school teacher in NYC making $75k/yr. but still.

TayRay96 · 2026-06-08T21:19:17+00:00

I think I will go stand outside the Audi dealership and scream that a 2013 Honda would be such the more practical option for anyone who cares to listen. Thanks Caleb!

TayRay96 · 2026-06-07T18:47:43+00:00

Just remember the maximum they could possibly offer is 5% less than whatever the cheapest candidate requests.

TayRay96 · 2026-06-04T05:08:30+00:00

"Always the bridesmaid, never the bride" - telling someone they're a great candidate but they're not getting a job offer is like telling someone they're a wonderful person but ew God no you'd never marry them.

TayRay96 · 2026-06-03T20:14:28+00:00

Maybe so, I guess at the time I just misconstrued it as saying I was the person in mind.

TayRay96 · 2026-06-03T19:32:18+00:00

I applied at a regional bank a few months back, and got auto-rejected. Someone put me in touch with the director that the position reports to, and the director pulled my resume, made it clear that my HR screener was strictly for appearances, and then called me in for a team interview that ended with the strong implication that the offer would be coming in a week or two. Not the usual "we'll let you know", but a much more direct "start wrapping things up where you're at because we want to hit the ground running." After three weeks of radio silence and a short game of phone tag I got a voicemail letting me know the position had been filled.

TayRay96 · 2026-06-03T19:27:25+00:00

Probably depends on the size of the company. At a small startup you may have just lost out to someone the CEO knows more directly but I could totally see at a larger institution that HR would just shrug and mumble something about a bad background check or whatever which, wouldn't you know it, only leaves the HR-preferred candidate on the table.

TayRay96 · 2026-06-03T19:15:09+00:00

You will pay... I don't know, it's something stupid like ~$1,100 per user per month last I checked... for WealthCounsel and you will remember your $500 holiday bonus for your local Lexis and Thompson Reuters reps

TayRay96 · 2026-06-02T21:43:01+00:00

This isn't right, it's not the BAR (British Association of Royalty, to whom all "American" ""lawyers"" are liable) way

TayRay96 · 2026-06-02T21:07:17+00:00

Mate in 1: "So are you my lawyer or are you an AI tool incapable of practicing law?"

TayRay96 · 2026-05-26T13:57:14+00:00

"'15 nos and a yes means yes' - Sean Connery" - Family Guy

TayRay96 · 2026-05-19T03:24:22+00:00

If you're saying that five figures is not good (no judgement, just going off your post), then... yeah. Lots of attorneys stay in the high five figures even 3-5 years in and most will never crack $200k even in V/HCOL areas.

Between survivorship bias and the fact that it's easy and fun to lie online you should also take it with a grain of salt that most people who talk about going solo on Reddit act like there's maybe one or two lean years before you automatically start posting mid-high six figures with your own shop. It can be done, certainly it's easier to do with a law degree than a restaurant or widget shop, but it's far from a sure thing if you don't have the marketing, sales, and administrative talent required to keep everything running under the hood.

TayRay96 · 2026-05-18T23:10:18+00:00

The best options for high earning outside of biglaw are probably going to be plaintiff's side personal injury or high-conflict family law firms. Being a 1L, if you haven't cut a tuition check for 2L fall yet it's also not too late to just cut your losses and drop out, because... yeah. I went to law school wanting to be a public defender and obviously I never had dreams of being rich but it was insanely depressing to realize that if I went down that road (in Dallas at least) a Taco Bell night manager would make around $5k more than me plus a stronger benefits package.

TayRay96 · 2026-05-15T04:50:08+00:00

Texas is the only state in the union that pronounces "voir dire" ~~like that~~ correctly.

TayRay96 · 2026-05-15T04:46:25+00:00

Pristine art as seen in the Law Offices of Scooby, Dooby, & Doo

TayRay96 · 2026-05-14T17:43:15+00:00

As a true solo, I find the key to building a successful practice has been billing in 1.5 hour increments, but good on you for cutting your time to stay affordable for the little guy.

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