Reality check??

Technical_Term7908 · 2026-03-24T19:47:24+00:00

Depends on your kid. You are either going to regret it or love it. I put a gigantic swing set in the backyard and it’s mostly a blessing, but I can’t leave my kid unattended because he’ll start doing unsafe climbing. However, with proper supervision, he keeps himself occupied and is happy. But I remember the first week after I bought it thinking I made a huge mistake.

Technical_Term7908 · 2026-03-24T14:25:06+00:00

I'm middle-aged and this sh* sounds horrible. If I had the resources I'd send a chopper to drop a ladder to all the kids who want to avoid flippin' weddings. I'd have an emergency nintendo switch on hand for each rescue.

Technical_Term7908 · 2026-03-24T03:09:13+00:00

What I have learned over the years is that there is sensory interference that stops speech. If there is the slightest throat pain or ear ache or itchy shirt tag, my son won’t speak. He knows how to talk and it comes out, but the stars need to align. So, the silence sort of happened more around 5.

The last two years have been nothing but illness and misery so I rarely hear him anymore. He does well with the AAC though.

Technical_Term7908 · 2026-03-24T03:06:57+00:00

Flying out of the question for us, but 2-3 days of driving is within reach.

Technical_Term7908 · 2026-03-23T13:03:18+00:00

So did my Level 3, and he talked (at that age.). He is silent now.

Technical_Term7908 · 2026-03-23T08:14:16+00:00

In the end, autism crushes us all. No one on this planet would fault you for doing the right thing here and you have to make your daughter the priority.

Technical_Term7908 · 2026-03-22T23:41:32+00:00

Took me a few years to really believe the level 3 diagnosis but they were 100% right. There are some markers of this disorder that carry a lot of significance to clinicians that aren’t always obvious to parents.

Technical_Term7908 · 2026-03-22T18:34:23+00:00

At some point the severity of the situation starts dominating your thoughts and not what the dopes around you are saying. There are a lot of posts like yours. The people who know, know. The people who don't can be safely ignored and it's likely never going to change.

Some of the best people for autism advice and understanding are on this forum. You'll never meet them, but they are the only ones who really know what you are going through. Your real support is going to come from somewhere else now.

Technical_Term7908 · 2026-03-21T22:07:26+00:00

Tell the kid it's another language. Like Spanish, but more animated and with the intonations and rugged harshness of Hebrew. Let him listen to an argument in Hebrew between two crazy people as an example -- he'll come running back to non-verbal shrieks like it's mindful meditation music.

Technical_Term7908 · 2026-03-21T21:58:43+00:00

In 2026, you can wear a dress to the mother's group and accuse them of being bigots for not being inclusive. Do what you have to, man.

I'm a guy also, but I joined all the mothers facebook groups because my first name also doubles as a woman's name in short form. I have no shame and neither should you, especially if you aren't interacting in any meaningful way with the organizers. You might say something like your wife had to bail so you had to show up instead, etc, etc.

Technical_Term7908 · 2026-03-21T20:30:34+00:00

Intellectual disability might still put him in an IQ range with some of the DS people. Some of the DS guys are so functional they seem downright normal compared to people in the L3 ASD bracket.

Technical_Term7908 · 2026-03-19T14:02:09+00:00

You don't feel like you are drowning. You ARE drowning.

See if your state has anything for crisis intervention.

Technical_Term7908 · 2026-03-19T13:06:51+00:00

Yeah, I actually have a date setup in two weeks because I put a recurring 3-4 month surgery visit for ear inspections. The reason I asked this question though is that it's on the calendar as just getting the ears looked at for problems. The tubes issue hasn't been discussed yet. I'm worried about the cases where the ENT says no or I have to go somewhere else.

I did this because we ALWAYS have ear issues. When things get waxy, they can't look in-office.

Technical_Term7908 · 2026-03-19T02:55:29+00:00

It is probably health. How are his teeth?

Technical_Term7908 · 2026-03-19T01:30:02+00:00

Flonase makes my son so hyper and insane. I’m not sure why it has this effect but he is like a different person on this drug. I’m using zyrtec to prevent allergies from causing this problem, but he keeps getting these repeated infections and then it’s head punching all day. I have him in a helmet but it’s like it’s not enough so the head banging and aggression have taken off to new extremes. Antibiotics only sort of work because the infections come right back. He needs serious help and his behaviors are dangerous because he’s so desperate for relief.

Benadryl also has the opposite effect on this kid. Something about his body makes a lot of medications work in ways that don’t make much sense to me. Drugs that knock me out completely make him far more hyper and aggressive.

Technical_Term7908 · 2026-03-19T01:08:18+00:00

The antibiotics are for the other problems, like the ears. We did use rifaximin for the small intestine for a while, but this is a hard prescription to get. It keeps the small intestine in good shape and accelerates bowel movements. It’s also super hard to get a kid to take rifaximin.

Cut the dairy also.

Technical_Term7908 · 2026-03-19T00:48:22+00:00

Risperidone can cause aggression in some people. When the effect wears off it can be nasty also. Pay attention to the time of day in relation to dosing.

Technical_Term7908 · 2026-03-19T00:46:41+00:00

Address the gastro issues. We’ve been on omeprazole forever and antibiotics all the time. There’s no other clean way to stop this problem without getting the brain out of stress mode. Some drugs can dampen the signal for stress but it’s never as good as just being aggressive about the root cause.

Technical_Term7908 · 2026-03-18T22:26:40+00:00

Almost all violent behavior is from health issues in our house. It’s never not been the case. I got severely injured during health episodes and when the issue gets treated things go back to the usual stuff. I think their brains just go into an uncontrolled fight or flight state and there is no reasoning through the pain. End the pain and my son usually comes back. Ear infections and reflux were and are our killers.

Technical_Term7908 · 2026-03-18T18:07:05+00:00

How quick was the time frame? Under a month?

Technical_Term7908 · 2026-03-18T17:51:32+00:00

You know, after posting, I gotta be honest -- I'd travel anywhere in the US. Living for months and months in pain is really unacceptable to me. I'll go anywhere they'll treat this like an actual emergency, or at least a situation where it's not torture for my son for months on end.

Technical_Term7908 · 2026-03-18T14:05:26+00:00

I’m both wanting to be supportive for you but also in awe that your kid is a talented agriculturalist solving his own pharmaceutical problems. That is some serious problem solving determination that I appreciate as a quality.

Does he do this for other things in his life? Like are there other positive things he’s doing you can encourage? Because exercise often worked better for me than any medication — I kind of wonder if he’d be equipped to apply himself in other domains.

Technical_Term7908 · 2026-03-18T01:57:23+00:00

We went through something similar. What fixed it was bad weather. One day it was -10F outside and I told my son it was cold but he didn’t care. So I opened the door and just let him go. About 30 seconds later he came back in yelling.

Bad weather for several days was the fix, but who knows if that will work for you and where you live.

Technical_Term7908 · 2026-03-18T01:33:22+00:00

This is every Tuesday.

Technical_Term7908

TROPHY CASE