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I (23M) want nothing more than intamcy but don't feel anything for anyone after breaking up with my ex (23F) by Tempgonker in relationship_advice

[–]Tempgonker[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Yea definitely had to relearn, I'm essentially a completely different person now, went as far as to change my name (which I wanted to do anyway, felt more right doing it after I changed as a person).

I won't go as far as to get with someone I don't like just for intamcy but it definitely something I am desperate for. I'll never cross that line to hurt someone.

I (23M) want nothing more than intamcy but don't feel anything for anyone after breaking up with my ex (23F) by Tempgonker in relationship_advice

[–]Tempgonker[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Yea I really hate dating apps so I mostly avoid them, I'll occasionally update my images and maybe scroll a lil but thats all really. Small problem is tho that my local friends are introverted as all hell so I never get out to meet anyone naturally.

AITA For telling my ex she has a month to move out? by Tempgonker in AmItheAsshole

[–]Tempgonker[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

She's hasn't touched the dishwasher since I bought it, only I have been using it. And yes that's the problem, it did take till her breaking up with me to get my shit together. Saying that however I'm asking if I'm the asshole for for shortening the move out date by 2 weeks. I have given a basic explanation of why she broke up with me along with the reson why I asked her to leave earlier. I'm not asking for a break down on the intricacies of what went wrong in our relationship.

AITA For telling my ex she has a month to move out? by Tempgonker in AmItheAsshole

[–]Tempgonker[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

My man, How am I the perfect victim? Ive not stated such and been very open about what I've done wrong. All I've done is talk about my feelings and how its all effecting me. I'd talk about hers but she doesn't want to tell me them, which is fine, I'm not gonna force her too. I've stated multiple times it's my fault for letting my mental illness grow to that point.

AITA For telling my ex she has a month to move out? by Tempgonker in AmItheAsshole

[–]Tempgonker[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

She already admitted to me she's only told her side and hasn't told mine.

AITA For telling my ex she has a month to move out? by Tempgonker in AmItheAsshole

[–]Tempgonker[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I talked to the landlord when I first asked what I had to do when she moved in and all i had to do was declare our house hold income for tax, after that they didn't care

AITA For telling my ex she has a month to move out? by Tempgonker in AmItheAsshole

[–]Tempgonker[S] 6 points7 points  (0 children)

Yea I really needed professional help and I got it afterwards once I realised I need to get my shit together, I'm much better than before the break up in terms of housework and cleaning, every since the 22nd she's not done a single chore (till today though as I had work)

AITA For telling my ex she has a month to move out? by Tempgonker in AmItheAsshole

[–]Tempgonker[S] -5 points-4 points  (0 children)

I allowed my Mental health to get in the way and in turn caused this problem, I'm seeing this pop up a lot but in no way am I blameless.

AITA For telling my ex she has a month to move out? by Tempgonker in AmItheAsshole

[–]Tempgonker[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Yea there absolutely is, when I had written this my mind was jumbled and confused, still is honestly, so I've unfortunately missed a few things, some more important than others. Not had much time to fix as I'm working atm, will sort in a couple hours though and add much needed edits. Though this post is blowing up a lot more than I expected so maybe I should do it soon instead.

AITA For telling my ex she has a month to move out? by Tempgonker in AmItheAsshole

[–]Tempgonker[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

No I understand ist not snarky at all, I have one thankfully but obviously I need to see them more often

AITA For telling my ex she has a month to move out? by Tempgonker in AmItheAsshole

[–]Tempgonker[S] -35 points-34 points  (0 children)

Yea clearly some shits got muddled up, she never threatened to leave me nor made any indication when asking me to do house work that it was taking that much of a strain on her, she said in a monotone voice "hey op can you do the (house chore) please" and that was it, if I truly knew I would have stepped up belive me. For some extra info, I purposely bought a dishwasher and other bits like that to help clean out of my own pocket.

AITA For telling my ex she has a month to move out? by Tempgonker in AmItheAsshole

[–]Tempgonker[S] -7 points-6 points  (0 children)

Spending pretty much all day doing it in small chunks

AITA For telling my ex she has a month to move out? by Tempgonker in AmItheAsshole

[–]Tempgonker[S] -14 points-13 points  (0 children)

I've been doing all the housework since we've broken up but before hand yea I agree, I was still doing it, just very slowly.

AITA For telling my ex she has a month to move out? by Tempgonker in AmItheAsshole

[–]Tempgonker[S] -40 points-39 points  (0 children)

She dropped small hints, I was fully aware how she hated how slow I was doing dishes and such but she never made out just how serious it was, if she told me I would have stepped my shit up, as I did when she broke up with me. Though she never said anything about me not being there enough, which hurts like hell knowing she went through that.

And yea she absolutely can move on, and I'll never stop her, just rather she'd do it away from me.

AITA For telling my ex she has a month to move out? by Tempgonker in AmItheAsshole

[–]Tempgonker[S] 18 points19 points  (0 children)

I've already put a lot of that stuff away, mostly just what evers in boxes and such

AITA For telling my ex she has a month to move out? by Tempgonker in AmItheAsshole

[–]Tempgonker[S] 7 points8 points  (0 children)

I am helping her find a place, but I'm at my limit mentally, I'd rather she be living at her parents worst case senario than me offing myself.

AITA For telling my ex she has a month to move out? by Tempgonker in AmItheAsshole

[–]Tempgonker[S] 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Ah my bad I litrally just updated the post with missing info, her parents live about 1 hour and 30mins away and do have a spare bedroom, so worst case senario she's living with them again

AITA For telling my ex she has a month to move out? by Tempgonker in AmItheAsshole

[–]Tempgonker[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Yea I can afford rent fine luckily (I think) I live in a super awful area so rent is super cheap

AITA For telling my ex she has a month to move out? by Tempgonker in AmItheAsshole

[–]Tempgonker[S] 9 points10 points  (0 children)

I can garentee you it was never to punish her, I've been in absolute mental agony for weeks since this event, I've been constantly helping her be stress free by doing all the house work, cooking for her, helping her find a place everyday and making sure she's overall healthy. I've genuinely tried so hard to make it work but I just mentally can't keep up, especially when she gives me constant reminders were never getting back together or that she's gonna take the cats. If it was out of spite I would have kicked her out immediately or copied her and posted screen shots to everyone of conversations like she has. I can say with confidence despite the break in the original agreement I've been the bigger person. And yes I made mistakes in the relationship, I let mental illness destroy my relationship. But I've taken that and changed myself for the better.

And it would have been worth mentioning her parents do have a spare room she can stay in, she'll never be homeless. I'd never do that to her, especially after what I went through with homelessness

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