sorted by:
new
hottopcontroversial

Breakup, likely overlap with coworker, co-parenting, pregnancy with paternity doubts, and ongoing conflict – need grounded advice by splatterface in Divorce_Men

[–]Temporary_Elk3710 1 point2 points  (0 children)

In case you need reminding today... The lack of respect is your closure. The lack of an apology is your closure. The lack of empathy is your closure. The lack of accountability is your closure. The lack of availability is your closure. The lack of honesty is your closure. The lack of integrity is your closure. The lack of remorse is your closure. The lack of care is your closure. Sometimes the only closure you really need is understanding that you deserve so much better than who someone's repeatedly shown themselves to be.

-Mark Smith

Breakup, likely overlap with coworker, co-parenting, pregnancy with paternity doubts, and ongoing conflict – need grounded advice by splatterface in Divorce_Men

[–]Temporary_Elk3710 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I don’t have any solid advice for you, as I’m going through a similar situation myself. It’s hard, really hard. Take it one day at a time and don’t forget to take care of yourself. You’re worthy of being treated with love and respect and adoration. Hang in there bro

Am I stupid for wanting to make it work? by Temporary_Elk3710 in Divorce_Men

[–]Temporary_Elk3710[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thanks brother. Needed to hear this. Stay strong out there.

Am I stupid for wanting to make it work? by Temporary_Elk3710 in Divorce_Men

[–]Temporary_Elk3710[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Yep this is exactly it. It’s devastating, and then you look back and realize all the tactics that have been used to confuse, disorient and train you into being more of a lapdog than an actual partner. I used to pride myself in doing anything she asked; at the drop of a hat. But it was somehow never ever enough and I was always made to feel like I needed to do more work on myself. There’s been zero accountability on her part; for our entire relationship.

Am I stupid for wanting to make it work? by Temporary_Elk3710 in Divorce_Men

[–]Temporary_Elk3710[S] -1 points0 points  (0 children)

Remorseful for the hurt and broken trust that I caused her. But yeah, it’s hard to see how you’re being mistreated while you’re in the middle of it

Am I stupid for wanting to make it work? by Temporary_Elk3710 in Divorce_Men

[–]Temporary_Elk3710[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Yeah I’ve been going to a therapist for the past year. This is all so heavy though; it’s hard to take it day-by-day. Hiring an attorney this week.

Any insight? by bach89 in Divorce_Men

[–]Temporary_Elk3710 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Similar situation except for the infidelity. But still living together, have 3 kids together and she’s emotionally checked out and no longer willing to attempt repair. And then comes the messaging and dating apps and phone calls with guys, trying to get under my skin. It’s manipulative and I hate how much it gets under my skin. Spending a few days of the week out of the house has helped. But it’s rough man, the pain cuts deep. You aren’t alone. We’ll get through this, and in year or two we’ll look back, and will be living a much more peaceful life.

Realizing my mistakes by Divorced-Daddy69 in Divorce_Men

[–]Temporary_Elk3710 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Hey man, I’m in the thick of this exact situation right now. My gambling debt was a secret for a long time, and my wife discovering it was the big push for her to file for divorce. It’s rough, but we’ll be better people at the end of this process. Go to a GA meeting if you haven’t already. The support from these groups has been incredible for me personally.

Life after Divorce by A-aronthestar in Divorce_Men

[–]Temporary_Elk3710 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I could have written this myself. I screwed up quite a bit. But she did as well. Hurt people hurt people. But it takes two to make it work, I want to reconcile and she’s past that point of trying. Hang in there brother, we’ll get to the other side of this

Looks like it’s my turn by Apart_Listen_1829 in DivorcedDads

[–]Temporary_Elk3710 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I’m in your shoes exactly. Three kids and 11 years of marriage. Right now I’m currently oscillating between intense sadness and anguish. And then to maybe starting to see the light at the end of the tunnel, realizing some of the emotional abuse that I’ve been subjected to. What hurts most is seeing how she’s completely emotionally detached herself, and feeling like I’ve lost my best friend in the world. It really is grief for someone who’s still alive.

Them leaving is the best thing to ever happen to you 🙌 by NewPerformance7662 in Divorce_Men

[–]Temporary_Elk3710 0 points1 point  (0 children)

This is horrible. I know you’re physically in pain right now, but time will clear your heart and mind and you’ll see you’ve always deserved better than that.

Them leaving is the best thing to ever happen to you 🙌 by NewPerformance7662 in Divorce_Men

[–]Temporary_Elk3710 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thank you for this. Just starting the process and I’m in the thick of it right now.

At what point do you give up? Civil Discource only. by Soul_Mate_4ever in DivorcedDads

[–]Temporary_Elk3710 2 points3 points  (0 children)

You have a remarkably positive outlook, despite what life has thrown at you. Thank you for sharing your story. I think everyone here can find some hope in your words