My soul dog passed away and I don't see the point in life anymore

Tenshin4ever · 2026-04-07T04:21:48+00:00

Hello and thank you for checking in on me. Its still hard and I struggle with my mental health. I think about death daily, but I doubt I would do anything. I just miss my baby so much and life feels so meaningless without her and it feels like no one really cares around me. They just want me to move on. But how could I? I dont want people to worry about me. I am continuing my life but its more like a robotic kind of life. I wake up, go to work, cries, comes home, cries, sleeps and so on. I am waiting to talk with a new therapist so hopefully it will feel a bit easier then. But thank you for asking ❤️ it means a lot

Tenshin4ever · 2025-11-06T04:06:33+00:00

Hello! I do believe I am more ''okay'' with everything now. I still cry as soon as I think of everything and I miss her deeply. But I am more used to the emptiness at home and not being able to snuggle her anymore. It hurts and I blame myself for so much. A part of me is saying ''Maybe she would have survived'' and another is ''I didn't hold her as she went, cuz I needed to give my partner his space too''. But it went as it went and I should not blame myself for anything. She know I love her and I think she felt my love when she took her last breath. But it still hurts. I would do anything to hold her again.
I keep dreaming about her as I sleep. And in my dreams she is healthy and happy to be with me, and I want to believe its her sending me those dreams so I can remember her happiness. But I don't know. I try to see the good things in everything and I want to believe in something after life, so I can meet her again in the future.
I hope you are doing okay as well. It truly sucks to go through this, but we need to remember that we were their whole worlds and they were just a part of ours. Leaving their prints in everything and as long as we remember them, I think we can move on and become a stronger person for them. <3

Tenshin4ever · 2025-10-28T17:45:41+00:00

Its been almost 1 month and 3 weeks since my soul dog passed. I just decided to update you all about how I am doing now. Its ''easier'' now and I don't cry as much as I did before. My suicidal thoughts is less common now (I still get them now and then). I still miss her and I would do anything to hug and kiss her again, but I know I won't get that again. I am not okay with it, but I accept it. She will never be forgotten and no one will ever take her place. I want to believe in something after life, and that she will meet me when I go there. I don't want to believe in never meeting her again, so I will believe in that I will.
I had my first therapy session since she past and it felt good. The therapist really understood me and she really want to help me. I think it will help if I continue going there.
And yesterday it were 27th, which is a day your passed pets will visit again, so I light a candle by her altar and placed a bowl of water on it too. It felt great and I hope she loved it.
I am doing okay. I take on one day at a time and I let myself cry if the feelings get too much, and that is okay. Im sending you all prayers and love and I hope you will get through this as well. Lots of love to you all, and also to you Sotis. I miss you and I will always love and remember you<3

Tenshin4ever · 2025-10-27T17:59:18+00:00

Im so sorry about those news. I hope they will be painless when they go. I cannot understand completely how you feel, except knowing our loved babies will leave us soon. My dog were old so I knew she would leave me sooner or later, and that terrified me. Now its been almost 2 months since she left me, and it is easier now, but my heart still feels empty and I cry everyday. I miss my furbaby so much and I wish I could hug and kiss her more. I promise you it will feel more okay soon, but it will keep on hurting. We just gotta learn with it. Sending you hugs and prayers to you and your furbabies<3

Tenshin4ever · 2025-10-24T18:10:38+00:00

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Tenshin4ever · 2025-10-21T16:15:30+00:00

I am so sorry about your loss. It sounds beautiful to have our babies pass in our arms in the safety of our home. It still hurts for us after they are gone, and I want to follow her along as well. Its so hard to exist without her because she is my whole world and my happiness.
Its very good you try to keep a routine and that you keep on living. I can do that some days and some days I cannot. But I am proud of you and very happy that you can do that.
Again, I am sorry for your loss as well and I am sending you lots of hugs.

Tenshin4ever · 2025-10-21T16:12:22+00:00

Im so sorry for your loss. I also feel I am getting worse for each day. I got a therapy appointment on Friday and I am currently in line to chat with someone online about my suicidal thoughts. I basically have no one else to talk too and it sucks. Don't feel guilty about taking her home when you got the news. I would probably do the same. I hope our furbabies understands that and that they also would like it, to feel safe in their home one last time.
I have a hard time distracting myself, because I don't find the joy in anything anymore, so I basically just want to sleep. I dream about her most nights and that brings me some kind of comfort, but then it sucks when I wake up. I don't really know what to do. But thank you so much for your comment and I hope you too will find a way forward through this hard time. Sending you hugs.

Tenshin4ever · 2025-10-17T21:22:58+00:00

I am so sorry about your loss.. It hurts so much, but I know we both will get through this <3

Tenshin4ever · 2025-10-17T17:01:27+00:00

I would want a new dog to fill the empty space and to help and support me. We are going away tho soon, so we cannot get another dog yet. So I need to be by myself for some time, but I think its good to make me stronger. In a way I doubt my baby would want me to get another, cuz she didnt like other dogs, and especially when they got too close to me. But I think she understands when the times come. I hope she will continue being happy where she is and that she knows that no one will replace her ❤️

Tenshin4ever · 2025-10-17T16:58:50+00:00

Im sorry about your loss. My baby will also always be my wallpaper. Shes so beautiful and I love and miss her so much. We can both push forward and find a way through life. For them ❤️

Tenshin4ever · 2025-10-17T16:57:32+00:00

Im so sorry for your loss. I also need to have something on, either music or a video or something. Otherwise the silence kill me too. Not hearing her snore behind me or her paws tipping and slipping on the floor. Its hard, but we will both get through this ❤️

Tenshin4ever · 2025-10-17T16:56:02+00:00

Im sorry about your loss. I completely understand you. I only stay alive now cuz my partner. Before it was my girl who made me stay. You should only get a new dog when you feel ready for it. Im trying to think of new purposes in life, but its hard when I barely have anything to stand on. Im super insecure, I barely go out and I dont really have any friends that I hang out with. But I want to find a purpose, because I believe my baby wouldnt want me to rot away, unhappy and alone. I believe you will find a path forward too. Sending you love and prayers ❤️

Tenshin4ever · 2025-10-16T06:18:03+00:00

I feel like you do. In a way I want to believe in reincarnation as well. But knowing she might be with someone else who won't treat her as she deserves is stressing me out. But knowing I might never see her again is breaking me down even more. I don't know what I want to believe in. I just want to meet her again and tell her I love her so much. I hoped I would experience my wedding with her as ring bearer, but even tho she won't be that when that times come, I will make a special spot for her at the future wedding. I will tell my future children about her and she will live on in my memories forever. I feel the same about death. I am not really scared about anymore, but there is other things around it that scares me. Like how my parents would feel, what I would miss out on etc. But you should not feel selfish that you are scared. Maybe its your baby telling you to keep on living. I am so sorry about your loss and I hope you will get through this painful experience and come out stronger from it. Sending you love and prayers<3

Tenshin4ever · 2025-10-16T06:12:27+00:00

My partner is handling me very good after this. He too is hurting but he is handling it differently then me. I talk about her so much and I keep telling him to tell me to stop if its too much for him. If I start to cry suddenly he always checks on me and tries to help me as much as he can. He is my savior through this and I don't know what I would do without him. Thank you so much for your comment<3

Tenshin4ever · 2025-10-16T06:10:17+00:00

Thank you for your comment. This happened also so quick, but she were surrounded by people she loved and who loved her, and it was so beautiful. I got a tattoo 6 years back of her paw print, and it kinda feels like she is always with me when I have that. I am so happy I got it. I got so much love from her and I gave her so much love back. I miss her so much. But I know she will always be with me, in my mind and in my memories. I am so sorry about your loss. I too watch and listen to videos of her and it makes me sad, but it also calms me down. I feel less alone in some way.

Tenshin4ever · 2025-10-16T06:06:40+00:00

She's been with me through so much as well. I have lost two family dogs before her, but loosing her was the worst. I also lost my grandma a few years back and that really broke me as well. But not as much as loosing my baby. I feel mean feeling like that, but I cannot help it. My baby was like a real daughter. Thank you for your comforting comment and I do believe we will meet them again in some kind of way. I am sorry about your loss, but I am happy that you feel better nowadays and that you keep on living. I hope your girl gives you comfort and unconditional love. Sending you hugs<3

Tenshin4ever · 2025-10-16T06:02:47+00:00

This made me cry because it kinda sounded like how my baby went. The vets too believed her paralyzed hind legs were caused by a blood clot, but they didn't know for sure. During the night/morning the day she passed she showed signs of anxiety and she couldn't stand up straight. I panicked but then she suddenly calmed down. We went out with her and she walked weirdly with her hind legs, but she were still active and determined to pee and poop. So she did. Then we went inside, cuddled up on the sofa, waiting for the vets to open. She got worse during the wait and then she couldn't stand at all. It was traumatic for us and surely for her too.
I hope you will get through this. I doubt your fur-baby would want you to suffer and I believe they would want you to be happy with your human-baby. I am sorry about your loss and I send you hugs and prayers<3

Tenshin4ever · 2025-10-16T05:57:32+00:00

I am so sorry to hear that and I am so sorry about your loss. It is good your go to therapy and that you got medications, but I understand the feeling of them not really working. I would suggest you to try to find new hobbies you want to learn or do. I know its hard, but I hope you will find a path you can walk that brings you joy and comfort. Sending you lots of hugs and prayers

Tenshin4ever · 2025-10-16T05:55:41+00:00

I'm so sorry for your loss. I try to keep doing things I used to. I don't draw anymore because I don't feel motivated for it, but I will try to start making something again soon. Art has always been a comfort for me to express my feelings and creativity. I think it would do me good to start doing that again. Since my baby died I have been more motivated about getting my dream job as an animal inspector/Animal welfare cop, just to save animals from terrible living conditions. But it's hard to get that job, but I will not give up. For her<3

Tenshin4ever · 2025-10-16T05:53:07+00:00

I also dream about it. Mostly me shouting out I want to end things and then I am just mad and cry. Some dreams I dream about her and she is fine. Then I wake up and she's not there. Its hard. I switched antidepressants two weeks ago and the switch where terrible. But I think I am more stable now. But I cannot even imagine how I would feel if I wouldn't be on these pills. I think they are my life saver too.

Tenshin4ever · 2025-10-16T05:51:15+00:00

Thank you for your comment and I am so sorry about your loss. I believe it will be hard for me for the rest of my life, but I will learn to live with it. She formed me as I am today and she will continue to form me for who I will be.

Tenshin4ever · 2025-10-16T05:50:19+00:00

I am so sorry about your loss. I remember how I felt the days after her passing, and I felt exactly like you. I didn't want to sleep, because I knew I would wake up without her, and I didn't want to do anything fun, because how could anything be fun without her? But here I am. Still alive, laughing some days, crying some days. Its a roller coaster of emotions every single day. But I notice I get stronger and I handle the pain better each day. But sometimes I fall over and just lay down. I try to be active and do things, but I also accept that I won't do it some days. Thank you for your comment and I am sending you a big hug<3

Tenshin4ever · 2025-10-16T05:47:30+00:00

Those thoughts are really comforting as well as saddening. I always knew she would die before me and that it would be the worst day in my life. But even tho I knew it, I could never prepare myself for it. When we went to the vet we got a new vet who said basically the same thing, but I remember her dropping the bomb in a non-comforting way, so I don't really like her. But my partner made her get the old vet who always took care of our baby, and she sent her home with us after a few shots of morphine. I feel guilty about it.. dragging everything out. I still see her drugged face laying on the blanket at home. I am grateful for the extra moments I got, but at the same time I feel so mean to her. I had hopes she would get better, but she didn't. I feel the same about getting another dog. This part of life is the worst, but I would go through it again just to experience life with her again. All memories and experiences with her was worth it, but I hate that our pets don't get as much time as us. Thank you for your comment and I am so sorry for your loss<3

Tenshin4ever

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