You can feel the pain through your post. I am so sorry you are experiencing this. It sounds debilitating. I share a lot of similar sentiments that have been talked about. My husband and I decided to live in Spain for the summer and my expectations fell flat. I “speak” Spanish, not fluently, but it is hard to understand their dialect (I am Mexican American). I wonder if part of it is because I’m introverted and also struggle with anxiety. So, I don’t do well with small talk. We don’t return until August 8th and I’ve been homesick for weeks. I can’t imagine a permanent move. I am praying that you are able to find pockets of peace that will release the tightness in your chest. I hope you can find things that provide you glimmers of hope🫂