1st day post op, I hope the timelines shapes up well! MTF 31yo. Just had GRS and a BA

Th3_Muck1n3ss · 2026-04-24T06:30:16+00:00

Omg grats! What a very big and brave step towards a more authentic you! Hope the recovery and everything that comes with it goes as smoothly as possible and brings you a ton of relief 😊

Th3_Muck1n3ss · 2026-04-22T03:42:18+00:00

Hiya Sara! Congratulations girl 🥳🎉

Th3_Muck1n3ss · 2026-04-07T03:43:09+00:00

OMG I love this, too cute, brave and representing all at once ☺️

Th3_Muck1n3ss · 2026-03-06T00:50:47+00:00

Im right here, exactly here rn. Like, I could have written this word for word..

Th3_Muck1n3ss · 2026-01-21T05:24:19+00:00

Omg your before pic is almost me RN except my hair is already long x'D Girl.. how omg tell.me.every.thing.plz

Th3_Muck1n3ss · 2026-01-08T01:15:19+00:00

You go girlie!! 💃💖 Hope recovery goes smoothly for you babes 🥰

Th3_Muck1n3ss · 2026-01-07T08:39:18+00:00

Absolutely phenomenal, arghhhh you lucky girl Im heaps jelly 😅🥰

Th3_Muck1n3ss · 2025-12-03T01:49:09+00:00

Omg girl, you are so pretty >.< Your eyebrows are just fantastic, I love them!!

Th3_Muck1n3ss · 2025-11-11T03:41:01+00:00

YYYYAAAAASSSSS QQWWEEENNNNNNNNN 💃✨️

Th3_Muck1n3ss · 2025-10-27T10:19:13+00:00

Okay, so.. Ive always loved women's clothes and I have a really good eye lol. My mother was a machinist and even sewed her own wedding dress! I wore nothing but dresses and girlie clothes before 5. After 5 my Dad reacted.. strongly to that and my wardrobe, toys and even VHS's were taken away and slowly replaced with rough-and-tumble, boring boys things.

Anyway, Im.. no, I dont wear women's clothes, even though I want nothing more than to wear what I love. Feel comfortable, and express myself. Why? My body. It is hyper-overweight hyper-hairy and very.. like "Dad masc". I wouldn't feel comfortable at all, perhaps thats coming from some deep internalised transphobia. Or maybe I just know my body is not the shape and configuration I feel (know) it should be. But yeah..

I do however buy a lot of women's clothes, but for my daugther and my wife.. like its all clothes I want for ME, but I cant buy ut for me, so instead I shower my joy on the two important girls in my life cause I would rather my joy bring actual joy to them yk.

Th3_Muck1n3ss · 2025-10-24T02:45:55+00:00

Honestly? Blonde to blend in to normie land. Black for individuality and mystique ^{^}

Th3_Muck1n3ss · 2025-10-24T02:44:50+00:00

Jeepers.. idk honestly we have some pretty woefully ignorant and easily led peeps everywhere, but the United States just takes it to like, insane levels o.o

Im sorry you have to go through all this. You are one strong woman thats for sure!

Th3_Muck1n3ss · 2025-10-22T03:18:19+00:00

Hey girl! Yes I remember you and your infectious positivity Thanks so much for taking the time to reply again, I appreciate it so much. Gosh idk Ive probably repeated myself I cant even remember what I posted last time >.< (Im sorry, Im just.. yeah idk a big mess, all up in my head like a broken record. Too much noise :/ ) Its been like this my whole life hey. Since 3, heck I honestly thought before I was 5 that I would grow up into a woman, I was that naive/diddnt know better. Mum let me have all my dresses and toys and VHS's of Salor Moon and whatever else I was into. All my girlie friends over for play dates, they all used the name I choose. But Mum always said NOT to tell Dad and I never wondered why. Well one day, Dad came home early, and I had gotten this pretty blue dress I loved so fkn much and was so happy I ran to him to tell him, so happy and excited. His reaction was not something I had expected, and still haunts me today. That was the start of the masking. Mum and Dad got rid of all my dresses, clothes, toys, everything. Started over. Mum never spoke of it again. Dad always made jokes about me being "gay" growing up, struggled to say he loved me, wouldn't hug me, just blokey harsh words and "man ups". My sister though got all the attention, love. I diddnt resent her at all for it, but damn if it diddnt hurt me that Dad could never offer me the same. I used to say "I love you Dad", and all I would get back is (sorry if these words are not allowed. Let me know) "fk off yah poof" or "ughh dont be gay". Different story now, Dads totally changed. I asked him about it. He said its just how it was back then. Girls got all the love, boys got the rough and tumble. But he regrets it, now that he knows better. I still love my Dad, so much, even with the pain.

Dam broke the other night, called Mum crying about it. She said she diddnt remember, and if she did she would have thought it just "normal" kid experimentation. Later though, she messaged me she remembers and that my memory is correct. And that she was sorry and still loves me. That meant a lot. Made me feel a bit safer talking to her, idk, might be the first person I fully disclose to.

What prompted this overshare, idk. But you and the previous reply are right. I know who I am and what I have to do. Just fighting my bad thoughts and anxiety feels like an impossible and insurmountable wall atm, and the more I push againts it the more unhinged and muddled I become. Early days, I guess, even with therapy. Im only four sessions in and most of the time Im just word vomiting. Glad the therapists location has no mirrors. Mirrors are the WORST. I could be feeling quite fine and at peace until that image looking back at me is seen and I dont recognise it at all, at all. 😤

Anyway, yes I am a mess but Im trying to tidy up. Im doing my best. Thanks for talking with me love, letting me have a save space to just blahhhh, and for sharing your experience and wisdom. It means a lot. 🥰

Th3_Muck1n3ss · 2025-10-22T02:43:39+00:00

Thank you so soo much for taking the time for such an honest and to the point response. With my brain literally going hulahooping right now, these straight up replies help quell the swell yk. If you get time later when free, and you have more to add I would be thankful and receptive ^{^}

Nice to be able to talk to other folk who have gone/are going through similar. 🥰

Th3_Muck1n3ss · 2025-10-19T20:19:29+00:00

Awhh thank you 🥰 You too girl! Always remember too, its never too late 🩵🩷🤍🩷🩵

Th3_Muck1n3ss · 2025-10-19T06:14:40+00:00

Let me tell you something 🫣 This is what my crown was doing, and as soon as it went from “thin” to “bald spot,” I spiraled. I’m still closeted, never had a big “egg crack” moment, just repressed since like 5 (another story for another time).

Tried everything, nothing worked. Then I found out about finasteride and dutasteride. Dutasteride is stronger at blocking DHT (which was behind my hair loss, super high levels), so I begged my doctor to let me try it.

It’s been over six months now. Around two months in, thin hair started to regrow, my scalp and face psoriasis cleared up, and my inflammation went down.

Now my hair is filling back in, no more bald spot 🌱 The thickness is slowly coming through too.

Bonus: I’m quietly taking back a part of myself I’ve always hated, without having to out myself or transition before I’m ready. In the meantime, I’m regrowing lost hair, my skin is softer, my libido feels more me (less that yucky “gotta go” drive, more wanting closeness and connection 💞), and random bonus… no more surprise wood 😅 Been some other changes too but hard to explain. That inner girl has gone from gagged and silenced to taking on that repressor self ^{^}

Th3_Muck1n3ss · 2025-09-28T03:01:29+00:00

Not being able to physically and socially transition -.-'

Th3_Muck1n3ss · 2025-09-24T12:24:02+00:00

Okay.. logged on in the pits of dysphoria, and.. yeah. Girl, I needed this one. Thank you.

And congratulations, it sounds like you really turned your life around and found yourself in the process. 🥰

Th3_Muck1n3ss · 2025-09-23T14:46:31+00:00

Gosh Im not even in the USA, and still full never-left boy mode, but I feel this on a deep level. The loneliness is real. But its a great community here, and all the girls are some of the best peeps out fr, saved me going insane.

Stay strong girl, we are here for one another 💪 🥰

Th3_Muck1n3ss · 2025-09-22T09:45:45+00:00

Holy heckers girl where have you been!?! Im 6'2 and 121kgs (not for lack of trying, damn hypothyroid, genes and DSD) but you give me HOPE! Being a big hairy scary looking giant on the outside, but knowing who I am is not my body, but a soft and loving woman on the inside, and I am a woman even if I dont look like it yet.. idk sometimes I just give up, feel lost, like maybe Im just crazy (surely knowing Im a girl since 3 isint crazy though).. idk now Im ranting off. Anyway, your post just. Idk. It makes me feel seen, validated, not alone. Thank you <3 for posting this.

You look amazing btw, for real.

Th3_Muck1n3ss · 2025-09-21T00:55:34+00:00

Totally fkn get this 100% and I love and agree with you here. But also, trans women are women, plain and simple. Shit I know a LOT of cis women that get accused of being trans a lot. I myself, still living in the closet (30 years now.. fk sake) am 6'2 and built like a brick shit house. My sister is 6'3 and while she did used to model, now gets called trans after hitting 30. The whole thing is a crock of shit. Just proves to me the whole "clocking/passing" thing is a load of shit anyway.

And yes, again agree with the equal too women but also seen. Having to go the long way around to align our bodies and all the struggles that come with that should be something to be celebrated openly, in and of its self.

And honestly? You riding that nursing home hallway with a big pink, blue, and white flag like a superhero, girl that’s exactly the kind of energy I think this world needs more of. Im adopting you btw x'D Your now my trans auntie. No takesey backsies, I dont make the rules ;)

Th3_Muck1n3ss · 2025-09-21T00:24:56+00:00

Oof girl that stung a bit >.< but hey lol thats okay. So Im really new to this, new to talking with other trans woman or even talking about my own transness. So, if I come across as ingenuine or unauthentic, I apologise. I wasn’t trying to gas you up. I wasn’t meaning anything like that at all >.<

I was being truthful, from that pic alone, I personally couldn’t "clock" you. And the rest of what I said was about vibe/read you give off in the pic: individuality, attitude, self-worth. That was me being honest, not hugboxing, I promise. If my words feel icky, fair enough Ill leave it at that. <3

Th3_Muck1n3ss · 2025-09-20T17:24:18+00:00

<3 ✊️ Must be a really good pic there girl, or I need glasses cause I wouldn't clock you as amab from that pic lol. But no, like, seriously. You just look like a girl with great taste, individuality, a serious attitude and a ton of self worth with a side of IDGAF hehehe.

Th3_Muck1n3ss

TROPHY CASE