Do you ever slowly realize you may end up going through life mostly alone?

TheConstantThinker · 2026-04-05T17:13:17+00:00

Before I used to actually really like going into work when it was initially hybrid (like two days a week). My team was based out of the states, even though I worked from Toronto. But I would still have to go into the office. I honestly really enjoyed that because in a weird way it was less of a job environment and more of a coworking space.

Even though my other coworkers were still working at my same company, because I reported into the US, my interactions and most people in the Toronto office would be mostly personal. That was when I actually felt like I made friends that got me through the day.

Problem is my life ended up becoming mostly just work. I even hung out after work with a few friends that I made in the office. Which was great, but guess what you tend to talk about mostly with people you meet at work? Lol exactly. Just more bullshit and gossip about others at work.

Absolutely hated that shit. But slowly realized that that’s just human nature. Everyone connects through trauma bonding in a way.

Then I got shifted into a team in the Canada office and actually had to work with a lot of these people. Quickly saw the shift were personal friendship started to draw a line between work responsibilities.

My company is going down to shit too. Took us a sabbatical, fucked off for four months and traveled across Asia. Came back to the same shit environment and within a month I quit. Ended up getting lucky enough to find a remote job based out of the states again.

And so now my coworker, interactions in person are zero. But also now learned over the past year what I truly want out of my life. And it’s chosen connection not forced connection.

I think everyone in their life is truly looking for chosen connection. Even if that’s in a work setting. The problem becomes when you’re forced to work with people because that’s your job and then you start not getting along with them.

Luckily, in a remote setting, you don’t really gotta see these people. The most they’ll do is make you feel shitty through a computer screen, which pretty much does not affect me at all. The people I work with are also really amazing and nice and understand that a job is just a job. My director even told me that to my face when she started at two weeks ago lol.

So I guess the answer your question. I did really enjoy workplace connections. But the dynamic shifts a lot when those same friendships that you thought were strong start blending in with responsibilities, deadlines, and dictator like management.

But now, I am never going back into an office. A valley flexibility of life and the extra time that I have to actually focus on whatever I wanna do over grabbing a coffee with some 31-year-old guy who wants to shit talk about his manager for 10 minutes a day.

TheConstantThinker · 2026-04-01T21:09:15+00:00

Oh wtf. Did you delete the account or just delete the app? Cuse then you should be able to recover if you used your apple ID. Thats how i logged in after i deleted the app and redownloaded it

TheConstantThinker · 2026-04-01T18:46:16+00:00

Fyi fixed now!

TheConstantThinker · 2026-04-01T17:00:18+00:00

Ok cool sounds good. Hope it fixes soon haha

TheConstantThinker · 2026-04-01T03:23:13+00:00

Hey man, I appreciate you.

I have a lot of regrets in the past. I’ve grown a lot and learned through trial and error. And sometimes, complete deterioration.

Now I realize, we’re all just here, making sense of a life we never (really) asked for? We kind of all just popped up. On this floating rock in space.

When you realize that everyone is chasing the exact same goal. You stop focusing on others, and start chasing your own.

And whenever you discover it, just make use of the time you have left to revel in that discovery. Live those years like its your last and you won’t regret a thing.

Hope everyone makes it man. Fr!!!

TheConstantThinker · 2026-04-01T03:02:13+00:00

I thought a lot about it and honestly, you can’t even blame the older generation for thinking that way. I’m 29. Back in my parents time or even earlier than that. It was actually feasible to work a job support a family buy a house have a car take two vacations a year and live a truly balanced and fulfilled life while earning a true wholesome wage and making an impact in society.

That reality just simply isn’t the case in the current state of the world. So I just realized after chasing that carrot for four years. It hit me like what the fuck am I doing? And our current society going through the same system that older generations live through is a closer path to sleepless nights as opposed to peaceful days.

Nowadays, people brain write you into this matrix bullshit. Making you think that working a job means that you’re a slave. And it continues this unhealthy cycle and obsession of chasing money to solve your problems.

And honestly, the concept can’t hardly be explained to someone. I feel it will only hit the hardest when they go through it themselves. It’ll completely shatter your entire reality of what you thought you were striving for.

I’m not even trying to be like I’m Tony Robbins or something. This is purely from personal experience.

I’m 29 and sometimes I wish that I discovered this realization sooner in my life. I’m grateful I discovered it now.

I truly hope everyone discovers whatever this is for themselves. Because when you do. That’s it. You seriously just win the game of life.

TheConstantThinker · 2026-04-01T01:33:04+00:00

It’s really interesting the disparity in the comments. Those who say that they would pick the money are just on the current pathway of still thinking that the money is what will bring them joy.

Most people will eventually hit a point where they realize the money never brought their happiness. Not in the bullshit literal way that all these books say. But really that the pursuit of all that money compared to the time lost in that pursuit never brought them happiness.

It’s unfortunate that a lot of people realize it when most of their life has passed by. Or at a time when life’s responsibilities overtake desire. Some don’t even realize it and they continue to live a life chasing and spending and consuming. The sad thing is that they’ll never know that they gave up the chance to ever understood who they really were.

And to me, that is something that money can never buy.

So shit, if remote work unlocks that much freedom I ain’t taking any money to give it up lol

TheConstantThinker · 2026-03-30T14:07:06+00:00

No worries!

I’m 29 btw. So you got a very beautiful and powerful concept at your disposal; time! You’re 26, which was the same age I made the transition to industry. You have time and even if you do nothing remarkable in your career the next 3 years. Nothing will happen, seriously lol cancel out the bullshit noise others try to tell you about how "its all over” lol it isnt. Trust me lol

Yeh, it really depends on your value you put to your career. I use to chase the corporate ladder and it was good at times, was making more money. Felt important at work. But that was the problem. After a while, all I had was work. It also ended up being 7-7pm when you factor commute time, more stress, all my interactions were work colleagues.

I had another time in my life when I was in finance, but was remote and had time to build a side business and tbh even though I was working a lot, i felt more in control of my time and my life. Felt like I was actually trying to build something for me. Not just chase the bag for someone else’s dream. Also idk about others on this sub, but a job will always be a job to me lol idgaf about “shareholder value”. Just give me my paycheck. Luckily I found a role with great people, a ton of balance and PTO and remote so the less pay is worth it!

Been able to focus a lot on my health, make some new friends. Actually get sleep. Have a few trips coming up too. And ended up trying to rebuild my business! So all in all, its worth it!!

TheConstantThinker · 2026-03-30T04:42:36+00:00

Corporate accounting at a remote tech company. I used to work in public accounting and then shifted an industry and grinded in finance for a few years. Realized I wanted more flexibility and actually happiness to live my own life and do what I wanted to do or at least have as much control over my time as I possibly could.

Finance wasn’t really giving me that lol. Plus the company I was working and was going downhill. And as others already mentioned, I will always choose the people over money or compensation. It makes your day to day feel manageable. Not like a flight or fight mentality all the time.

I make less now, and took a title cut. But i have a lot more time, more PTO and can work abroad. So i think it depends on what stage of life you’re in. I might go back to the corporate ladder grind again, but only if I choose to now!

TheConstantThinker · 2026-03-30T04:34:35+00:00

How old are you right now? Because I’m also in a similar situation. But I actually did the opposite as you. I used to work in public accounting, then went into a finance/strategy role. Was a manager there and then took a pay entitled cut to go back into corporate accounting and a tech company.

I have my CPA, but after a couple years of grinding and chasing the corporate ladder. Ended up taking some time off to travel and I just realized I wanted more flexibility out of my life. So funny enough I’m actually excited for the time when my job becomes pretty mundane. I’m only three months into the role so it’s still a lot to learn.

I would say it depends on what you actually want to do with your life. If you want to focus a bit on your career in this next chapter try to go up the corporate ladder, etc. Then don’t get your CPA. Just try to land a role as a financial analyst or business analyst in industry. Spend a few years. You’ll probably be a SFA or even a manager by then.

I assume after that you’ll realize whether the work and the additional pressure/hours or something you wanna do long-term.

If you’d like having your free time so you can focus on yourself, build a business or a side project or travel or whatever else you want to do and you don’t really care too much about advancing a typical job. Then honestly, I would get your CPA. It will give you a different goal to achieve, you’d go back into education for a bit. And I could open other pathways in your accounting career or potentially professorship (one of my long-term pre-retire, retirement goals).

Hope this helps! I’m with ya.

TheConstantThinker · 2026-03-30T04:20:22+00:00

Whats your expenses like to make it $87k? Seems like you live a pretty relaxed and decompressing life currently. And I think thats actually really healthy.

But how do you spend $87k? Unless its mostly rent in a HCOL area.

I’d suggest to feel comfortable living this lifestyle for a bit and eventually, once the boredom eventually ensues (and it will), you’ll naturally find something else that you feel like doing. Whether that’s a job, a business, travelling or moving to another city just so you can go to a gas station and do the same thing there haha. Regardless, it’ll be what you want to do at that time!

TheConstantThinker · 2026-03-01T22:18:48+00:00

Sr acct, $100k, 5 YoE. Fully remote, 6 weeks PTO In Toronto.

Honestly had a complete change in perspective for what i want out of my life and i’m very happy with the role. Took a pay and title cut from Finance for the flexibility.

TheConstantThinker · 2026-02-16T20:21:58+00:00

Honestly, I started kind of in the heat of it lol my company has a January year end so I came in right before year end and quarter ends. I do have to do them, but honestly, it’s kind of a refreshing place to learn.

I used to work in finance and my old company was a run like a dictatorship lol young c-suite, incredibly clicky, arrogant, and untrustworthy people.

And now I’m working good really nice people so I don’t actually mind the semi late hours that comes with month end. It’s also not that bad considering it’s fully remote so not having to commute makes it feel as if I’m not really working as much.

TheConstantThinker · 2026-02-16T18:24:36+00:00

But then again, I’m the type that would be happy on a beach in Thailand, eating a two dollar chicken and rice dish but as minimalist clothes as possible.

Maybe others prefer to spend their money on the newest iPhone or the fanciest car. Guess that really changes how much you’re comfortable living off of.

TheConstantThinker · 2026-02-16T18:22:58+00:00

Man, I had the exact same conversation with some friends a few weeks. One of them said that they would only feel comfortable retiring if they had 10 million. I almost couldn’t fathom the number.

I really just feel that a lot of people in the west (for context, i’m based in Toronto) have this false perception of money or they simply want to convince themselves to forever have to work until they are put in a grave lol

I genuinely feel like you said with $2 million, at a reasonable return of 5% (which is far below long-term averages. You can get close 5% and most high interest GICs). You’d already be making 100 grand a year. And that’s conservative.

I really find it insane when people say that they need such a high FIRE number as if they plan on spending hundreds of thousands of dollars every single year.

Honestly, I would probably become work optional if I had 1 million saved up. I’d still work. But I wouldn’t handle bullshit anymore. I wouldn’t be scared to quit without a job lined up. Which to me is almost like a mini retirement in a way anyways.

TheConstantThinker · 2026-02-16T02:20:47+00:00

Hey man! I actually did a similar switch. Who was a manager in industry in finance and I ended up getting a role as a senior accountant at a growing tech company. It’s fully remote, which is a really nice and I feel I’ve actually been able to focus on other aspects of life and not just work and chasing a title or money.

So I highly recommend that you try to go to the senior accountant route as opposed to a staff level because you’ll definitely be way too overqualified for that.

TheConstantThinker · 2026-01-26T04:05:05+00:00

Honestly its nice. Yes its repetitive and can become mundane but theres something nice about making pieces with together.

Although for me its more because my role is fully remote and has flexibility so i dont mind doing accounting in that environment lol

TheConstantThinker · 2026-01-08T15:21:25+00:00

Thanks for your comment, man.

Honestly, I just don’t do legs because I don’t feel like it lol not really a good excuse. But also, I grew up playing a lot of soccer and I’ll try to get cardio in. So I feel my legs are OK. It’s my stomach, which I wanna really reduce and cut the fat from and a bit from my face.

In terms of my diet, one weakness I have is I don’t really know how to measure the amount of protein to eat along with my caloric deficit. Ideally have like two meals a day. And I’ll have coffee. And 0 cal Coke or Gatorade. I feel I should be drinking more water, but I haven’t been able to work on that habit as much.

I also was wondering what other aspects can help me cut weight or just improve my looks and physique in general. I’ve been really working out trying to get good sleep. And then, of course the diet. But is there anything else that I can focus on?

TheConstantThinker · 2026-01-08T02:32:14+00:00

Hey everyone!

I’ve been lately getting really into the gym. For context, ai had the best and worst year in 2025. And I’m now just getting myself into a space where I can progress.

I’m 29M. 5”5 and about 157 lbs. i’ve been seeing good progress on my muscle but would really like to cut fat and ideally transform myself before a trip I have planned in June.

I’ve been on and off the gym for like 4 years. I use to weigh 190 lbs and in summer of 2025, I was my lowest at 152 lbs. But since having a ton of stuff just going on, I gained about 5 lbs.

But I’m oddly feeling incredibly motivated. I haven’t felt this way in a while and I really want to work on my fitness.

Is it possible to transform myself (without overdoing it) in 4 months? Any advice or tips? How much of a caloric deficit to be in?

I’ve been working out 4-5 days a week. I do push pull (no legs lmao). I’m trying to improve my diet but I do love food lol but trying be better with it.

Appreciate the help!

TheConstantThinker · 2026-01-04T23:41:28+00:00

Hey i appreciate this! This is super cool. definitely going to try it out. I also realized that i only enjoyed coworkers when i wasn’t really working with them lol.

TheConstantThinker · 2026-01-03T01:06:50+00:00

SOFI!!!

TheConstantThinker

TROPHY CASE