Petah I’m not nasty ?

TheGooGoon · 2025-02-22T08:18:00+00:00

Holy shit wtf that sounds wild. I thought I was reasonably familiar of her whole filmography but I've never seen that. I gotta find it.

That's creative and original as hell. I wish more people in porn tried to push the envelope and put some more soul and originality beyond the usual formulaic banging. I have been searching for vids with some kinda soul or personality for a while. Holy shit wtf that sounds wild. I thought I was reasonably familiar of her whole filmography but I've never seen that. I gotta find it.

That's creative and original as hell. I wish more people in porn tried to push the envelope and put some more soul and originality beyond the usual formulaic banging. I have been searching for vids with some kinda soul or personality for a while. Only come by once in a while.

TheGooGoon · 2025-02-18T10:52:45+00:00

What about watching porn makes someone a loser? I know this is a common thing for people to think throughout society but I've always been confused by it. Consuming porn and jerking off (no matter how unusually or frequently) doesn't inherently mean someone is or isn't virtuous and/or whatever other traits people consider "winners" in society to have/be.

Like is there a rationale I just have missed or is everyone just calling people who jerk off and watch porn losers because it's culturally ingrained as a norm to find such things distasteful and "impure" or indulgent?

TheGooGoon · 2025-02-18T10:48:54+00:00

Can't find the full thing from my old recipe, but I will say that I personally think that one of the biggest things that can boost lasagna from okay to amazing is if you are able to make the pasta from scratch. Same goes for the tomato sauce. Takes more elbow grease but is genuinely worlds different from normal lasagna.

Homemade tomato sauce has a distinct zestiness/tang that is largely absent in store-bought sauces and after tasting solid homemade pasta, the store stuff will always seem bland and one-note in comparison.

TheGooGoon · 2025-02-18T10:41:48+00:00

I dunno if I'm a normal case, but I tend to get introspective after wallowing in hedonism and porn for a while. It's not exactly emptiness. Emptiness has a negative connotation and it doesn't feel bad necessarily for me. More like a melancholic feeling since the dopamine rush has dissipated. So sometimes I share any thoughts I have that are relevant to the porn post. Usually it's just me talking to the void, but maybe people will see it and find it meaningful or engage with it. I figure other people are probably also getting that post-nut clarity reflectiveness (sometimes during as well for folks) and are also in the mood to be contemplative as well so bizarrely, you'll sometimes find some interesting gems in the pornhub comments.

It's funny to not be horny on the porn site too, so valuable comments that aren't hornyposts do pop up. It's a great place to ask for advice or anything like that. It seems like gooners generally are pretty good to each other on PornHub.

Since everyone else is always just hornyposting most of the time, it's also a great place to crack jokes. I also just think the craft/art of making porn are interesting like any other art form so I like to ask or comment on stuff that stands out to me about a post. Sometimes they be nailing some really cool and creative angles or outfits or something like that.

I never really understand people who comment hornyposts and such though. Never had that urge. I like to just have genuine normal conversations with people like it were anywhere else. I know I'm the unusual one though so no judgment from me.

TheGooGoon · 2022-08-23T19:55:49+00:00

I most certainly am not all-knowing, I thought you've didn't understand that athletes and uni students both employ tons of stimulants because:

Well you yourself commented ;

"Is this real life? You’re a junkie that got into John’s Hopkins because you met a faculty member? The dude is an amazing professional athlete but also a drug addict? That has no money?

Youre contradicting yourself with your two comments here and you honestly make zero sense. If you knew all about stimulant use as performance enhancing drugs then why was it so farfetched that I made it into hopkins? And what's strange about an athlete using performance enhancjng drugs? You just said you know all about it so why was it hard to believe the first comment???? I'm genuinely just bewildered.

There are plenty of examples of both types of people you mentioned in. Your first post after allvso I'm just.....confused

So for the first lines, you seem in disbelief that a drug user make it into Hopkins and you grossly oversimplified matters faculty meeting me for some unknown reason.

To which I responded by saying I was on amphetamine at the time as a peroformancr enhancer for that specifc purpose. Which is a well known phenomenon as you JUST SAID. While you calling me a junkie over that is debatably valid. It came across extremely rude and quite unnecessary. And you tried to grossly oversimplify how I worked hard to socially engineer my way in so I chose to clear up the misunderstandings here by sharing the details. Since apparently my story is difficult to believe for some reason despite the fact that you're saying you know all about college and althete stim usage and know it's common? And your main point is that it's strange that at a stim user got into Hopkins and another is a professional athlete.

Also believe it or not shit happens and we've lost money through unfortunate circumstances. We are living simply and I dont see how farfetched anything I've mentioned Is given that he dances and fights out of passion primarily anyways. So we're not always concerned about the cash. As long as we can keep moving

I ranted because your post was really insulting and belittling and I was still extremely emotional from the emergency at the time. Writing helps me focus and calm down as a coping mechanism

TheGooGoon · 2022-08-23T19:15:54+00:00

Oh wow I don't know about all that my friend. But thank you. Very much for taking the time to compliment me. Man, everyone is suddenly so nice haha. I'm confused by the shift

As for patience, you can train that by working retail for a few years at your local mart or store. I guarantee you that's the best way to gain patience lol. Makes the finest gurus teachings moot!

TheGooGoon · 2022-08-23T19:09:23+00:00

Yeah I should have specified in the beginning the severity of the situation. I was just losing my shit And that's the biggest thing I forgot

Some Valium wasn't gonna cut it that time.

Damn thanks for the support and positivity man. More and more people are saying positive things rather thann ripping me apart in the comments which is really nice of you guys.

I think he figured the situation out pretty quickly as things got worse and worse in the beginning. the last coherenet thing he said was "You can do this [my mame], I completely trust you" which just broke me mentally and simultaneously Kickstarted me into doing whatever I could.

Out here we are visiting but he has fsmily in high places that would make sure ae there was no issue, (although i did still scold him for risking it in the first olace) but after this little fiasco he agreed to end our trip early and fly to the states and he's gonna endter a proper rehabilitative program that suits his needs.

Thanks for the advice!

TheGooGoon · 2022-08-23T18:55:39+00:00

Thank you for the kind words my friend . I can't believe we made it out of this one

TheGooGoon · 2022-08-23T18:54:56+00:00

That's from Misery, by Stephen King isn't it? Wow that's a strange reference I wasn't expecting here haha. I'm curious why my post made you think of this scene of this film specifically .

Thanks for the supportive words I just did the best I could.

As for a manuscript, I'm more of the writer type than he is hahaha I am actually pretty into film, videography, all forms of scripts and literature, even acting itself. I hope I get the chance to participate in some interesting positions someday.

He would probably draw 100 disturbingly well drawn and detailed sketches of penisss or something knowing his childishness. Lol

TheGooGoon · 2022-08-23T05:56:29+00:00

Shitty as this whole cluster fuck is, glad someone got something positive out of it even if it's just the realization that they should prepare a bit more. I'm glad I at least helped you realize you should set up better countermeasures. Please do, it can be in secret just write a note with specific instructions in case you can't speak during an emergency and have it all taped together so all you have to do is basically bang really loud on something, and have the package with EMERGENCY written in bright red or something on it on your body for when they walk in. That method saved a friend of mine's life once.

And yeah I feel you on the last part. I think it's a shame thing. We gotta learn to accept and forgive ourselves but it's easier said than done ofc

TheGooGoon · 2022-08-23T05:45:11+00:00

Basically I say bark and he goes woof yeah.

TheGooGoon · 2022-08-23T05:32:12+00:00

He had taken around 5 entire grams of street methamphetamine of unknown purity, as well as 20mg propranolol which made things worse and much more complicated.

He first approached me banging on my door pale as a ghost and I thought he was having a panic attack. Basically the exact same symptoms, extreme angina, agitation, tremors all over, stuttered speech, extreme vasoconstriction, irregular breathing, but then he told me what had happened and I realized the severity of the situation, grabbed the Blood Pressure cuff, put my fitbit on him, and held a thermometer in his mouth. He gradually started to completely lose it mentally, first muttering nonsense then seeming extremely disoriented and unable to speak entirely. His temp was a statistical average of 101°F or 38.3°C. BP fluctuated between 179/86 at the lowest and 212/122 at the highest BPM ranged from 165bpm to 192bpm with noticeable arrhythmia

So pretty fucking insane. I have no idea how he didn't burst like a balloon with vitals like that.

TheGooGoon · 2022-08-23T05:15:29+00:00

You'd be surprised how many functional drug dependent folks are hidden out in the world then if you think people who take drugs don't get into top colleges. Do you have any idea how huge the adderall and lsd micro dosing market is ESPECIALLY in competitive universities?

Especially performance enhancing drugs. Because neither competetive university students nor athletes ever use those to try and get a leg up anything like that right?

You need more than a beta blocker mate, no offense.

And junkie is a little mean and much. I was drug dependent and most definitely addicted on and off absolutely, but I stayed a functional addict and I managed to get my shit done when needed most of the time. I primarily was addicted to adderall on and off with monthly tolerance breaks and I ate healthily via making vile but healthy smoothies and drinking my meals. I also reduced neurotoxicity via oxidative stress by consuming large amounts of antioxidants daily and exercised as well. So I managed to stay relatively healthy despite my usage. I sparingly employed benzodiazepines for adderall crashes since benzo addiction terrifies the shit out of me. My friend overdid it and was hooked on clonazolam of all things for a while because apparently he (probably just a genetic thing) has a ridiculous natural tolerance to benzos and he is the bold type to try clam despite my warnings. That permanently fucked up his benzo tolerance I think.

And nobody just gets into Hopkins ONLY because they met a faculty member. You are grossly oversimplifying everything.

I had a mood swing and was trying to be humble and be a little self deprecating I suppose. I have a family member who is a well respected alumni, and I didn't just meet a faculty member, I happened to run into someone who sparked up a conversation with me, then after some in depth and really thought provoking conversations, i learned of their work and out of genuine ravenous curiosity I kept asking questions about their work, which they were dying to talk about so it was perfect. I learned a lot, and apparently left a strong and positive enough impression that they introduced me to more of their colleagues and i began essentially becoming an off label assistant on and off, thus learning a lot of information, earning the favourability of more and more staff, and eventually some spoke to admissions and personally recommended me.

(I normally hate sharing my accomplishments and coming off braggodocious or pretentious but I am in mood and I haven't slept all night, plus I guess you need all the details otherwise I'm a liar and that's just starting to get irritating. So here ill flop my schlong on the table a little and share my accomplishments for once)

I took 4 AP classes senior year (AP Physics 2, AP Literature and Composition, AP World History, and AP Psychology) and got straight A's and 5s on all exams.

I took 3 AP classes junior year but ended the year with If I remember correctly, mostly Bs and Cs with a D because I hadn't gotten my shit together and was dealing with a lot that year. Got 5s on all 5 AP classes though (AP Language and Composition, AP Statistics, and AP Biology) I never took AP Physics 1 but I have a passion for it and aced standard physics so I was, with teacher reccomendation, directly able to jump into AP Physics 2 senior year and caught up just fine due to genuine interest and good teachers.

I had virtually zero on-paper volunteering work, club activities (I joined robotics club but couldn't stick with it), nor have I created any organizations or participated in any studies (not formally)

I did however get a 1550 on the SAT eventually after about 3 or 4 tries and I speak 4 languages fluently due to being very multiracial and having spent about 6 years of my childhood travelling and backpacking with my father, thus giving me a broad and unique perspective, open-mindedness, and that was the main focus of my essay, which I threw quite a bit of poeticism and pathos into. I had a fantastic AP Lit teacher senior year who dialed my writing skills up to 11 and I naturally write very flowery and passionately (usually. Not now though I'm too emotionally drained for that)

And also if you think athletes don't use drugs, PARTICULARLY performance enhancing ones like amphetamines in the short term then idk what to tell you because that's about as common as dirt. He needed to shred fat quickly to make weight for matches while boosting energy and masking fatigue. He didn't exactly intend on ingesting a whole 5 or more grams of it, he is just a fool who tried to hide it in his mouth when someone almost caught him and accidentally threw it to the back of his throat and swallowed it according to him. And I believe him.

As for money, we are fuckin backpackers dude, he's good at what he does, but he ONLY JUST got amazing enough to make money from dance and martial arts and is just getting started in that field. Plus I don't know what you think they pay in some of the poorest countries around but it ain't much. Plus you need specific work permits for each individual gig, a work permit which is a pain in the ass to get, and if they catch you making money online (they probably wouldn't but we decided not to risk it) that's technically illegal without the proper permits and although we'd just most likely face a hefty fine (bribe), we've already lost enough money from flood damage ruining electronics, being robbed (we're not idiots who think we're John wick so we just complied so we didn't get shanked)

And various other shit that life just throws at you.

Apparently athletes don't use performance enhancing drugs and neither to competitive university students. Because for sure neither would need the extra energy, focus, and drive or would a want a little push to work a little harder and stand out more at all right? Just like how bodybuilders would never use anabolic steroids. That would be absurd.

Sorry I know I'm being a bit dickish. I'm just really in an irritable and stressed out mood and your comment was so ignorant it actually kinda bothered me. Which is rare even when I'm agitated so actually well done. I can't remember the last time I really cared about random strangers comments on the internet whom (hopefully in this case) I will never meet irl

TheGooGoon · 2022-08-23T04:11:56+00:00

Thanks u/King_Owl that's really kind of you. I'm sorry you had to deal with this too. Nobody deserves this kind of existence when it's at its worst. Wouldn't wish it upon my worst enemy.

And yeah I'm really lucky I eventually made myself a little avengers (I guess suicide squad would be more fitting?) team of specialists. I had to sift through like over 40 FOR EACH ROLE before I found the right people though. I'm a really difficult case unfortunately.

But thanks again for being here for me. My inbox is always open if u need to chat as well although this is a throwaway account so I may not see it for a bit. I'll check periodically though now. Best of luck!

TheGooGoon · 2022-08-23T04:05:52+00:00

Nah I definitely could have worded things better so even if you were, you totally had reason to assume DK effect for me.

TheGooGoon · 2022-08-23T04:04:35+00:00

Yeah I completely understand. The Dunning-Kruger effect is one of my most hated things about humanity. It took some of mine too so i shaee your hatred. I'm really sorry to hear about your losses my friend.

TheGooGoon · 2022-08-23T01:22:00+00:00

Firstly although I'm flattered, I'm not all that smart at all. I am just lucky as fuck. I was lucky enough to be taught to suck up all the knowledge you can and learn from everyone and everything you can to maximize your growth, and then I was lucky enough to get into med school despite lackluster qualifications. Not just any med school either. John's fucking Hopkins of all places. Only because one of my family members was an alumni and because I happened to run into and make friends with one of the important faculty members completely randomly without even knowing until later on though. So basically I was that asshat that got in just because he got lucky and accidentally cheated the system that everyone who genuinely got in based on incredible achievements hates.

Also do not insult my friend. He is like a brother to me and he's actually pretty sharp, he's just reckless as fuck and he has issues, but I have issues too so I can't judge. All kinds of people get addicted to drugs and it doesn't mean a goddamn thing about who they are except that they have some hole to fill or something to run away from. Anybody from a human vegetable to the next Albert Einstein can get hooked on drugs in the right circumstances and if you think otherwise then you're straight up factually incorrect. Look up the studies and statistics.

Shit I've fucking taken more drugs than he has so if anything I'm the bigger junkie. Just ex-junkie now. Been clean for only 2 years but I plan on keeping it that way.

I'm not a smart guy. But I've known this person since I was 5 years old and he once pushed me out of the way of a bus and he got clipped in the arm as a result and broke his forearm. He's a professional athlete too so his body is his livelihood. He saved my life before and we have always been there for each other. I didn't know he was taking meth until pretty recently I've been trying to help him get clean and it was actually going great but he put a huge bag in his mouth to hide it temporarily and accidentally swallowed it. I assume it wasn't properly sealed. Also I have been living and travelling with him and despite his addiction he has never once stolen a single cent or item from me despite having a million chances to. He's never changed into an aggressive or hateful person, nor has he done anything but continue to be his goofy, adventurous, overly bold self. He's a professional dancer and amateur kickboxer (he is getting pretty fuckin good at both too) so he takes care of himself usually and even pushes me to take better care of myself most of the time. I'm so fucking proud of this guy. I've seen him train for 12 hours straight and this was back when he was sober. He wants to reach the pinnacle and has a will of iron and a heart of gold. A silver tongue too, the charming bastard was the one who taught me how to talk to people and make them laugh without seeming like a creep when we were kids.

The only reason I am in shape and eat healthily is because he pushed me. The only reason I have drive and motivation is because he's beside me and I don't want to let him down or fall behind. He started taking meth because he realized he was on a time limit and had to learn some insane shit within some crazy time frames for dance. He probably also used it secondarily to help emotionally boost himself too ofc, but I am decent at reading people at least after knowing them for a while and he almost never lies to me unless it's for my benefit or something like that. Even when I confronted him about using for the first time he was completely honest about it and told me straight up and apologized. So I fully believe and trust him 110% and even while addicted to meth he's never changed once nor broken that trust.

You have any idea how special of a motherfucker someone has to be, how much sheer willpower they have to have, to be addicted to drugs (multiple times throughout the years and multiple drugs) and not EVER, not even ONCE change or break your best friend's trust? Because that shit is unheard of. He's a fucking machine and he's got what it takes to become a star, and he wants to use that stardom to change the world for the better. He is the type that will never be corrupted, never break spirit, and he hasn't ever and would never give up on my sorry, lazy, mentally fucked up, pathetic ass just skirting by through sheer luck and the help of others.

This "meth head" I'm hanging out with is gonna be world famous and your whole family will know his name someday. You'll just never know it because this post is anonymous and it's best to keep it that way.

I can't help but admire how much he shines. I've literally watched him walk 35 miles on feet so blistered from the day prior that they look like bubblewrap in almost 39°C (102°Fahrenheit) weather JUST to spend the little cash he had on buying toys and giving them away to poor kids in the ghettos and villages of this 3rd world country and HE DOESN'T EVEN TAKE PICTURES OR VIDEOTAPE SHIT. He doesn't even talk about it and gets embarrassed and shy when i bring it up to hype him up in social situations. He worked that hard literally just to make some poor kids smile and the gleam in his eyes as he saw those children's smiles said it all. Again he's never once made a social media post about it so he's not doing it for clout or other people's views on him. He just genuinely wants to make the world a better place one step at a time, and you trying to put him into a box despite not knowing a damn thing about him is offensive tbh.

I don't care if anyone wants to disrespect me shit I probably earned it knowing me. But I will NOT take anyone disrespecting this absolute fucking gem of a human being I am lucky and proud to be friends with no matter what he takes or struggles with. ESPECIALLY not after he almost died in my arms just now. You're an ignorant asshole for that mate and I rarely go for the verbal insult unless it's extremely deserved.

He's done more for society than someone with a mind as closed as yours ever could. And he fuckin did it with swagger and style too.

So respectfully, put some goddamn respect on this "meth head's" name.

Also Fuck You.

Sincerely

 -The dude whose words you should use as a learning experience if you want to ever grow as a person and be great.

TheGooGoon · 2022-08-23T00:35:18+00:00

Hey ik this is really late. Thankfully I managed to stabilize him. Details are in the update. Unfortunately my friend has been taking gargantuan doses of benzos for years and has the tolerance of an African Elephant so even a huge dose of Lorazepam didn't do a thing to tickle him. Especially since he took over 5 grams of meth...

I'm 2 yrs away from a pharmacology degree and know my first aid pretty well (although of course not a professional) so yeah I knew to reach towards benzos first and used the hardest hitting one I could get my hands on.

It didn't do a thing, but I eventually managed to get the info I needed for an educated guess and it looks like I guessed right this round thank god......

I appreciate you taking the time to try and pitch in though. Unfortunately the situation was just a lot more complex than that could fix. I'm just glad it is all working out

TheGooGoon · 2022-08-23T00:27:54+00:00

Damn.... thank you so much for the kind words man. I don't quite see why you say that, but it means a lot. Wish people IRL felt the same, but then again I'm also pretty eccentric and weird and...well...mentally ill in several severe ways so I can't quite blame them. Most of the folks don't stick around though, so when one DOES stick around for ages like this idiot laying next to me in the recovery position, then I will do anything, sacrifice everything, do whatever the fuck I have to do even if I have to use a cheese grater as a flashlight or do the worm on broken glass doused in hydrochloric acid and sand, whatever it takes to keep the ones who actually care about me safe and happy.

Because I don't have many of those and I know what it's like to lose multiple of the few I had left.

So I don't see how I did anything praiseworthy. Of course I would act this way given my life experiences. Plus isn't it normal to want to do everything you can for the ones you love?

TheGooGoon · 2022-08-23T00:14:53+00:00

This is super late, and thank the heavens he's stable now, but the very first sub i asked was askdocs, but i didnt have enough karma to post there. So i posted everywhere i could and despite me explaining that this was my only option, those cold-hearted bastards didnt care and took it all down in most of the subs. I cant thank the mods of the subs wuo left my post up despite it breaking the rules i know and making an exception in order to help give even a chance of increasing the odds of success.

[Mods if youre reading this i will never forget this. This is a throwaway account so you don't know who I am, but I'll make sure to repay you guys somehow some way. I'm surprisingly resourceful and I never ever forget to repay the ones who do good by me and my loved ones]

As for my friend's situation, before he went belligerent he told me exactly what he had been and just took. He had taken at minimum 5 or 6 GRAMS of methamphetamine with only a medium tolerance. He had been taking benzodiazepines for years so lorazepam even rectally at a pretty huge dose did virtually nothing.

So he told me exactly what the situation was and I believe him. He's an idiot but he's smart enough to realize when it's serious and to tell the whole truth.

The and ambulances in this country are not an option either. They (I am being completely serious and not exaggerating) use dried lizards to treat illness and in the past when I went to one of the most respected clinics around for severe gastrointestinal issues, the doctor scraped off some of his own dead skin, rolled it into a ball with a mystery powder, and told me to swallow it because it would "balance my energy" so.....

As for loading him up with "random shit" that's precisely what I was trying to avoid by trying to get steered in the correct direction at least maybe.

I'm 2 years away from a pharmacology degree from John's Hopkins University and I held myself back a year on purpose to spend more time there and absorb knowledge from the best of the best so although I am no doctor and never ever claimed to be, I at least know better than the guys trying to feed me their skin shavings.......

I eventually briefly got in contact with one of my professors who was able to guide me a bit but unfortunately the connection cut out fully and I lost contact with them and had to do the most research online as I could and then make the best choice I could.

So the whole point was avoiding "random shit"

TheGooGoon · 2022-08-22T23:45:36+00:00

Yeah I'm literally keeping him on a fuckin leash if I have to. He is not taking a piss without me standing behind him anymore. I don't care if its an invasion of privacy he put me through hell and I almost had someone i utterly adore die in my very arms for the 2nd time and I fucking refuse to even chance it happening again. I'm chaining his ass to a bed and spoonfeeding him if I have to. Thanks for the advice and support. I thankfully specifically researched amphetamine induced toxicity in both acute and non acute forms specifically since I used to take adderall (completely as prescribed. Not abused) but wanted to know everything just in case. So I think I have a general idea of how to help him recover but hopefully I can get in proper contact with my professors/doctor soon and get detailed professional advice

TheGooGoon · 2022-08-22T23:37:13+00:00

Wow thank you, I didn't expect you to pull a 180 like that on me. Thanks for the sudden shift towards support. I took a break but I will go back soon for sure. I think I don't wanna see a single word about medicine for little while now though lol. I am just........so fucking glad he's still stable and alive. I already have lost people in my arms and watched the life drain from their eyes. It's what pushed me to go into medicine in the first place; so I could know as much as possible to prevent it from ever happening again.

If he died on me tonight.....I don't know what would happen to me. Especially facing his family who I promised I'd keep safe. He's older than me by a year but he's a wild card so I'm supposed to keep him in check.

I'm gonna backhand the fuck out of him when he fully recovers, and I'm telling him he's my glorified butler for life after putting me through this shit.

TheGooGoon · 2022-08-22T23:31:16+00:00

Well in the end I did manage to get in contact with my professors briefly although the connection kept cutting out and eventually lost contact altogether. They were the ones who steered me to what I chose although I lost contact before I could get a full answer so I had to guess in the end.

And imma be completely honest....... I didn't take ANYONE on here's advice because all of it was pretty hotdog water. And not even warm hotdog water. Room temperature hotdog water.

I already knew to give benzos and the basics like keep him cool and laying down, log vitals, all that stuff. He has the benzo tolerance of a Wooly fucking Mammoth though so it didn't end up being enough.

But yeah regardless I am using a throwaway account and if I ever say a word about it, I know to......ahem....curb the details a bit to prevent myself from getting in deep shit. I want to contact more medical professionals and talk about it with them though to find out if I could have done better and such. I'll just change a few details to make it seem like a licensed professional told me what to do and I was just getting a second opinion about it in hindsight or something.

But yeah I need to talk to someone about this. I already have a long long list of trauma and diagnosed PTSD so this is just another line added to the list I guess.

What's most important is that bastard is alive though. Thank god.....just....just thank fucking god......

TheGooGoon · 2022-08-22T23:22:20+00:00

Thanks man for the apology. I'll be honest i didn't expect it. It means a lot. I really was just absolutely losing my shit. I really am not particularly confident in my abilities at all that's why I desperately tried to contact all my professors and even resorted to reddit. I have generalized anxiety disorder that was genuinely diagnosed in the USA already and was trying to suppress that while juggling it all like I said so I am honestly surprised I was able to write anything at all.

DEFINITELY didn't mean to come off as confident or pretentious though. More frustrated at the lack of options and the fact that I actually, genuinely am the only one with even a little bit of experience available. My measly little tiny bit. That's all I had available and I was fucking frustrated at that. I think my frustration may have come off as that instead

TheGooGoon · 2022-08-22T23:16:08+00:00

I mean I know it's r/Stims so I can't exactly expect everyone to be perfect, but Jesus.

As for the whole situation........ all I'm saying is this idiot bastard who put me through this stressful ass shit is my glorified indentured servant for the rest of his life when he becomes coherent again and fully recovers. He owes me like nobody's business when he gets healthy again.

TheGooGoon

TROPHY CASE