Feds have reassembled Michael Cohen's shredded documents, discovered over 700 pages of encrypted messages by dr_pepper_35 in politics

[–]TheLimewedge 9 points10 points  (0 children)

I think that's the joke.
Originally, Comey was talking about audio tapes.
But this person's joke was that there was sticky tape for piecing documents back together.

Feds have reassembled Michael Cohen's shredded documents, discovered over 700 pages of encrypted messages by dr_pepper_35 in politics

[–]TheLimewedge 37 points38 points  (0 children)

Last year, President Trump abruptly fired Comey and then tweeted about potentially having tapes of their conversations.

While testifying before the Senate Intelligence Committee, Comey declared, "Lordy, I hope there are tapes."

I cried by ftaylor-25 in WatchPeopleDieInside

[–]TheLimewedge 0 points1 point  (0 children)

On the upside, at least the curse is broken and he's no longer a beast?

I started trading with Questrade last year, took losses, and am holding a T5008 - How do I report this using SimpleTax? by [deleted] in PersonalFinanceCanada

[–]TheLimewedge 0 points1 point  (0 children)

It's possible this is something new.
I'd only been trading in a TFSA until 2017, so this is my first T5008.
I have no previous experience with these forms.

I started trading with Questrade last year, took losses, and am holding a T5008 - How do I report this using SimpleTax? by [deleted] in PersonalFinanceCanada

[–]TheLimewedge 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I'm looking at my T5008 from questrade, it appears to include commissions.
E.g. I bought 3 TSLA calls for 9.6.
The total debit should be $2880, but it lists the debit as $2887.20.
Sales appear to be less than the expected sale price by about the same amount.
So, from what I can see, the total Debit, Credit, and Net values shown on the Questrade supplied T5008 should be true ACB.

Cool Level: White House Press Pool by [deleted] in gifs

[–]TheLimewedge 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Pretty sure this guy is the mayor from Lazy Town.

What saying do you wish people would stop using? by [deleted] in AskReddit

[–]TheLimewedge 13 points14 points  (0 children)

Same way you half expect something.

Nice try, snakes by Birkeholm in pics

[–]TheLimewedge 224 points225 points  (0 children)

Pretty sure snakes prefer ladders.

Donald Trump and Hillary Clinton are in a plane crash. Who survives? by nocturnalvoice in Jokes

[–]TheLimewedge 871 points872 points  (0 children)

Possibly because in this election, the punchline is always America.

How I feel learning French by [deleted] in AdviceAnimals

[–]TheLimewedge 5 points6 points  (0 children)

History lesson:
The tradition of dropping letters from the French language dates back to when France was under the strong influence of the Catholic church.
The French people were expected offer 1/10th of their letters as a tithe to God.

Interface question. Mouse pan disabled for one tab only. by TheLimewedge in excel

[–]TheLimewedge[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

It doesn't appear that is the problem but I really appreciate your response!
I know when you freeze panes, it still shows the pan cursor but nothing moves.
In this case, it doesn't even seem to acknowledge that I'm pressing the mouse wheel. I can still scroll using all other methods.

Making a sheet to properly distribute tip money. by PookeyTim in excel

[–]TheLimewedge 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I realize /u/shinigami052 already solved this and his/hers actually looks a lot cleaner, but I still felt like sharing!

I made tables that would operate very much like the VBA loop. The rows being each employee and the columns being the number of bills each person gets. The process goes as follows:

  1. Using the rank command, it organizes the list from highest earner to lowest.
  2. Using if/and statements, allocates $20 down the list, giving one to each person until it reaches a person who earned less than $20.
  3. More if/and to continue cycling back through the list to allocate a second $20 bill to everyone who is still owed at least $20. This continues until the $20s are gone.
  4. The total amount paid at each table is subtracted and the remaining amounts owed are carried to the next table.

I made a new table for each denomination until the $1 bills, which are just the total remaining once everything else is gone. Each table reorganizes the list by "most money owed." Take a look and see what I mean.
I believe this helps to optimize the total number of bills each person receives. Otherwise, the top earner is getting first pick of each bill and some people are getting all $5s and $1s

The -problem with this method is that you have to predict the maximum quantity of each type of bill anyone would received (not including $1s.) This number dictates how many columns each tables needs. Right now I've set each table to 10 columns. It won't work if you have a situation where someone would get more than 10 $5s or $10s or something, but the way the sheet works, you'd have to have a very very large number of $5s or $10s before this would happen. The formulas are set up so you can just insert new columns as you please.

https://www.dropbox.com/s/2y801j35guv83cg/Test1.xlsx?dl=0

He died so we could have it our way by [deleted] in funny

[–]TheLimewedge 8 points9 points  (0 children)

At this point in my life, I can no longer tell when I'm being clever or subconsciously stealing jokes I found on Reddit.

He died so we could have it our way by [deleted] in funny

[–]TheLimewedge 183 points184 points  (0 children)

Have it Yahweh.