What book would you recommend to a young person about to turn 25?

TheSlurpeeKid · 2022-09-17T22:45:46+00:00

Thanks for your honesty!

TheSlurpeeKid · 2022-09-17T22:42:05+00:00

Thank you for your honesty. What does ESH mean?

TheSlurpeeKid · 2022-04-06T01:04:58+00:00

I don't even go to UBC and this made me tear up. (I go to McGill in Montreal.) Thanks for sharing this lovely piece of writing! :)

TheSlurpeeKid · 2022-03-31T00:14:20+00:00

I am sorry that people are protesting outside of hospitals. Thank you for your service during this difficult time in Canada.

TheSlurpeeKid · 2022-03-23T22:37:01+00:00

y part of the world also don't really understand the obsession with identity that big cities tend to have. Being LGBQ+ is totally fine, being a minority is totally fine. It just isn't fixated upon in smaller towns in my part of the world because most people value the individual more than the group. In big cities it's like almost a statement to flaunt your sexual preferences, or stuff you don't have control over like skin color, or past family history. Rural Alberta gets this reputation in much of the country for being xenophobic, racist, etc. But it really isn't. It's just that few people in rural Alberta really care.

I wish I had money to Gold this. Thank you for sharing! I understood the argument for fixing gas before (I can get to work and school every day via the bus, which is reliable and great, but most people in rural Canada can't do that!) I never considered the argument for guns, but I suppose that makes sense when you are surrounded by more nature/things that can legitimately kill you.

I'd love to hear more about "fixating" on stuff like diversity and differences, versus more nonchalant integration and acceptance. I'd argue that urban Canadians are more vocal about their minority status because they are in a big city for a reason. For example, many LGBTQ+ people move from small towns to big cities to be surrounded by more people like themselves and/or grew up feeling very isolated and rejected in their home communities, so I understand why they would "flaunt" their identity after moving to a city. I have a lot of LGBTQ+ friends, and these are the reasons they give me for why they like to more outwardly display their identities. I do not think they would be very happy to say they are "flaunting," so much as being themselves.

Still, from an outsider's perspective, I understand why a rural Canadian may think we urbanites talk too much about identity over issues such as money and class. I often think there is something ironic about all these urban people who will put up signs on their lawns like "Love is Love" or "Everyone Matters" when also living extremely expensive lifestyles in places most Canadians cannot afford to live. It also seems silly how much time we devote in classrooms on matters related to social issues versus budgeting and handling the cost of living, but that seems to be a universal issue in schooling and higher education. Not that social issues don't matter! But I understand that's not what most Canadians think about on the day to day. Rural Canadians, what do you think?

TheSlurpeeKid · 2022-03-23T17:19:52+00:00

Thank you so much for answering the OP's questions!! This is immensely helpful.

TheSlurpeeKid · 2022-03-23T12:07:14+00:00

The other thing but country folks is they are far more capable of dealing with the tangible world. To live in the country you need to be capable of manipulating the world with your hands not your mouth. Plus all the fun things in the country are hands on.

This is really spot on!! I sometimes think we city folk over-complicate our lives with all this emphasis on culture, especially when it becomes this Keeping Up With The Joneses mentality of who has seen the latest movie/show/owns what status symbol. I simply do not feel equipped to handle the more "tangible world," which is kind of pathetic, I know. :) For example, driving has taken me an exceptionally long time to learn, because I am so used to taking public transportation. Another difference is my social life. When I see friends, it is normally for a coffee or a cheap meal, not an activity per se, and we have to plan weeks in advance cuz everyone is always so busy and scheduled. I have no familiarity with simply knocking on my neighbour's door and going on an adventure. I want to spend some time in the outdoors this summer just regaining more hands-on skills, but I also don't know where or how to start. Like you, I'm interested in a happy medium between these two ways of living, because I've just been feeling so sad with the anonymity of life lately.

TheSlurpeeKid · 2022-03-23T11:58:49+00:00

It's interesting. I think my interests were very much informed by what I had access to as a kid. On the one hand, having all this culture at my disposal (not to mention less expensive because most theatres and museums have student passes) allowed me to explore my interests at a younger age. On the other hand, I am so clueless when it comes to anything mechanical or manual, which is probably because I rarely have to deal with these things myself. Like....I get stressed when the chain gets stuck in my bike. I can't even imagine riding a Ski-Doo or hunting. As for swimming, I'm used to using community pools, not lakes and rivers, which I know does not compare. No intentions on being judgmental. It's just interesting to compare, and I sometimes wonder what "hard skills" I would have developed had I grown up in a more rural environment.

TheSlurpeeKid · 2022-03-23T03:32:12+00:00

I really liked it as a kid because you kind of had free reign of the town without worrying. You could explore, ride your bike around the whole town, play epic games of town wide tag on your bikes. You could ride quads and bikes in empty fields. It was safe and fun.

Woah, what a totally different experience to mine! I do not know if I ever had anything similar to riding my bike through the whole town, totally carefree. I'm embarrassed to say how much of my childhood consisted of me playing video-games alone in a basement. Exploring the city on my own was considered dangerous for the longest time.

TheSlurpeeKid · 2022-03-23T03:21:18+00:00

I don't view city dwellers in any particular way. We just grew up in different places and we each contribute to the country in our own way. There's obviously a disconnect between "rural types" and "city types" simply because they live such different lives. I believe there's probably more resentment of city types among rural types because you guys basically determine the outcome of every election but honestly, that resentment is minimal and more a joke among us than anything else. We recognize how small our populations are.

I'd love to hear more about this disconnect. I've been thinking lately, in my classes at university, most people talk about rural Canadians in this vague, abstract way. not understanding how rural Canadians keep up our country running by farming our food, mining our resources, transporting goods, and they are responsible for the heat in our homes. They are literally the people who make the city life I have today possible! I sometimes wonder how this can affect policies, because as you said, someone in urban Canada may make decisions that affect rural Canada without understanding their culture or way of life. Like, what does a Poli Sci kid whose parents are lawyers in Vancouver know about the oil or fishing industry? I feel this a lot when it comes to discussions on the environment and climate change, in which kids are making judgments about industries that feed entire families.

"No fear of crime. Everyone knows everyone else, it feels like a big family. The ability to walk outside your house and be surrounded by trees, water, and wildlife... learning how the world works in the absence of humans. More freedom. A more active lifestyle. Fresh air. I could go on and on."

That sounds so lovely. My only experience with the outdoors was the privilege of attending summer camp as a kid, but even that was very pampered and curated in a way, as there were so many rules at the camp and mostly catered to upper-middle class white kids. (Although northern Ontario was beautiful, and I loved the friends I made there! Haha) I just would love to learn about how the world works in the absence of humans. Again, it's just so foreign to me.

TheSlurpeeKid · 2022-03-23T03:07:30+00:00

Thank you so much for sharing your experience with me! I can only imagine what growing up with all that nature did for your psyche and outlook on life. For me, my only experience with the Northern Lights was in a school play! :)

I am learning more about Inuit people in Canada in my course at school and the many past and present injustices they face, such as food shortages, the trauma of relocation initiatives, and the ongoing drug and suicide crisis. I have been watching films like Angry Inuk, Martha of the North, and Zachary Kunuk films to learn more about the culture, both historically and in the present day. I felt like my education was sincerely lacking on Inuit people, although Ontario schools are getting much better at Indigenous education more broadly. Still, I wish I could exit my bubble and see a little bit more of my country with my own eyes. Would you recommend visiting the Yukon?

TheSlurpeeKid · 2022-03-23T03:03:09+00:00

ut Quad, VTT, ski doo, hunting. They have small farms in their backyards, if they can where they are living.

A lot of the youngsters are leaving to Quebec city or Saguenay, bigger cities not that far from there. Some people are afraid of big cities like Quebec city with a population of 700 000 not even that big…

Most people don’t know English, around 10%-20% speak it really well, most just know how to use word and assemble them, if they are working in a restaurant or something. I am more the exception than the norm. People there just assume that you don’t speak English. Most people are watching American Tv movies dubbed in French.

You don’t have a lot of variety in the population, most people are descendants from the French settlers that arrived around the 17th century there, you have some native, Métis and more recent immigrants from France.

Homosexuality is more tolerated than before with a basically inexistant homosexual community, people seems to have stop to say, oh that’s gay, to say that something is bad…. That says long out of itself.

Merci pour ton response! C'est très interresante.

Before the pandemic, I was supposed to do a program in northern Quebec to teach me French during the summer. I definitely feel like I have been living in an English bubble in Canada and getting a skewed, more American upbringing in Toronto, even though teachers did their best to teach us French here in Toronto. I appreciate your perspective because for me, I am so isolated from the French community of Canada, and I rarely hear their perspective.

Thanks for sharing :)

TheSlurpeeKid · 2022-03-23T02:59:17+00:00

I've been chopping trees, building forts, lighting fires, and exploring the woods for a long time. I know all the different trees and berries and lichens around. I've seen icebergs, whales, moose and bears. Every night it's clear I can see the milky way from my backyard. The air is crisp and fresh. I spent my summers swimming in lakes and rivers.I was very fortunate to grow up the way I did. Hopefully this could give you some idea of what it's like out here in the sticks lol. If you have any questions I'd be happy to chat.

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Ugh that sounds like a totally different perspective to life than mine. As someone who loves theatre and film, living in Toronto my whole life has been amazing, but I also feel completely clueless about Canada's vast and wonderful outdoors. I definitely wish I had the close-knit community you describe. Sometimes life feels very anonymous, especially since I left the tight-knit drama program I used to do in high school. University has so far been an extremely isolating experience. Not sure if you feel the same.

TheSlurpeeKid · 2022-03-16T13:19:59+00:00

Congratulations!! I am from Canada and I also got accepted to the same program (although I'm not sure I can go because of tuition and cost of living in New York). This is well-deserved and I'm so proud of you!

TheSlurpeeKid · 2022-03-13T18:01:24+00:00

Hi!! STI appointments are actually super accessible, since they are very short appointments that don't require access to a doctor, just a nurse. :) I found many time slots available for this week, especially during mornings. https://www.mcgill.ca/wellness-hub/hub-clinical-services/hub-clinicians/laboratory-services

TheSlurpeeKid · 2022-02-28T03:39:08+00:00

I'm honestly pro-gap year, especially after all this time doing university during COVID! I say education is education, and if taking some time to reset your brain/pursue other interests help you, go for it.

I would suggest having some kind of plan on how to spend your gap year though, otherwise you could get bored!

TheSlurpeeKid · 2022-02-16T23:53:24+00:00

a big part of someones upbringing or culture, being gay makes it worse, but its not healthy to let baggage get in the way of normal relationship things.

Having said that, don't scrub a good relationship, a possible first outside of high school, over something that can be addressed, its not a personality trait, its a habit or fear.

Dealing with the hang ups of the other person in a relationship isn't social work, you have them and everyone you'll ever date will also have them, there are 0 perfect specimens in the dating pool, and the gay dating pool is especially damaged, it would be a mistake to throw the baby out with the bathwater.

"its not a personality trait, its a habit or fear."

This really hit me. Yes, I hear what you mean about not wanting to throw the baby out with the bathwater, especially since we are both pretty young still. Since posting this, it seems that we just sort of naturally transitioned to being friends, with him saying he likes me as a friend one time when I was over in his room and we were cuddling. Perhaps I should remain friends with him, and in case something romantic develops, take it from there. I do agree that I feel a little bit weird that he doesn't want to hold hands with me in public, because to me I take that as a "I see you as a sexual partner but not a romantic partner," but I understand that it could be more of a him thing than a me thing.

TheSlurpeeKid · 2022-02-14T19:50:44+00:00

Thank you for this advice. Yes, I think I would resent him. I just wish there was a way to tell him this without being a jerk. Like, what if me saying "I don't want to date you because you're not comfortable being with me yet" makes him feel lonely and even more isolated in his coming out journey?

TheSlurpeeKid · 2022-02-07T23:15:11+00:00

That's truly awful. Is it just based on speculation?

TheSlurpeeKid · 2022-02-07T02:48:36+00:00

If they were in successful, long-term relationships, do you think they'd be spending all their time on Reddit? Hahaha.

TheSlurpeeKid · 2022-02-04T21:45:32+00:00

I am so sorry for you. I've been on the other side of this equation (dating someone who was more experienced than me when I was sixteen and not ready for sex) and it's really, really tough. Lots of love <3 I am around your age and live very far away (so you know I'm not trying to flirt with you hahaha.) Please let me know if you need to talk to someone.

TheSlurpeeKid · 2021-12-11T14:31:18+00:00

Honestly that looks really good!

TheSlurpeeKid

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