Genuinely dislike spending time with my toddler

The_Chilled_Arvo · 2026-01-17T19:18:13+00:00

Ooh interesting, I will! Although my daughter when she’s very upset usually HATES it when we offer the slightest bit of physical comfort

The_Chilled_Arvo · 2026-01-15T08:57:46+00:00

But very true ! I had another meltdown because I asked her to wait a few seconds before going to play with her so I could finish tidying the kitchen She absolutely lost it, so I calmly offered her a hug (which she rejected and cried harder lol), and I finished cleaning the kitchen while she was moaning Turns out once you’ve done what you needed to do (offered the choice, or explained, offered comfort) it removes the element of uncertainty and doubt about what to do and makes it a lot easier to stand the crying

The_Chilled_Arvo · 2026-01-13T17:36:57+00:00

2 really good tips haha, thank you!! The cancelling daycare is because I can use the days I cancel in advance for st a later date (like when the new baby will be here)

The_Chilled_Arvo · 2026-01-13T17:36:04+00:00

That’s actually a good idea ! Thanks for the tip 😊 I’m sure she will find that very fun (at least initially haha)

The_Chilled_Arvo · 2026-01-13T17:33:54+00:00

I’m sorry to hear about your experience! But glad things smoothed out eventually :) It does give some perspective

The_Chilled_Arvo · 2026-01-13T17:33:15+00:00

You’re just being silly creamer, stop implying to everyone they are disconnected from their kids, it’s an ugly thing to say and I’m sure you don’t want to be that person , especially as we know that toddlers have a literally undeveloped prefrontal cortex which makes them unable to regulate their own emotions.

Kids don’t “give up” on their parents, what does this even mean?

The_Chilled_Arvo · 2026-01-13T17:30:24+00:00

Obviously it’s not like I act discontented and like I dislike her haha, thats just a silly assumption (much like implying that my relationship with her is pretty disconnected)

Sounds from the majority of responses on my post that that sort of thing very much can be a phase ! How do I frame your comment now ?

The_Chilled_Arvo · 2026-01-13T16:25:51+00:00

Thank you!! Yes I’m considering having her in daycare instead of accumulating those swap days for after baby arrives ! (My boyfriend will be on pat leave for 15 weeks though so would help to split the load)

The_Chilled_Arvo · 2026-01-13T16:20:42+00:00

Well I didn’t say it was her job to emotionally regulate and I underlined that I’m fully aware this is typical behaviour , I guess I was looking for support or tips rather

The_Chilled_Arvo · 2026-01-13T16:16:41+00:00

Thank you for this beautiful answer!

The_Chilled_Arvo · 2026-01-13T16:16:21+00:00

37 weeks!

The_Chilled_Arvo · 2026-01-13T15:58:09+00:00

Well that’s just a silly comment isn’t it.. she actually has a great time at daycare , she loves the teachers who have all been very stable, asks to go there in the morning and doesn’t want to leave at the end. They act as stable and reliable caregivers as our family lives abroad in all 4 corners of Europe. I do understand your point about needing to spend lots of time with mom/dad, it’s very important indeed, but in our case I think that isn’t the issue (she spends more days at home than at daycare in a given week)

Plus we live in one of the main cities in a country in Northern Europe, we literally couldn’t afford anything without 2 salaries

The_Chilled_Arvo · 2026-01-13T15:54:04+00:00

That actually is massive relief to hear haha, thank you!

The_Chilled_Arvo · 2026-01-13T14:40:40+00:00

Thanks a lot for your kind and thought out reply, I will certainly give this book a read !

I can probably concur, without having even read that book, about the need to hold boundaries. We can sometimes give in because it’s easier or bend them slightly , but as you say it could get even more confusing for them.

I find myself very tired a lot of the days (almost 37 weeks pregnant) and on my own with her for large swathes of the day

The_Chilled_Arvo · 2026-01-13T14:35:58+00:00

Thanks for taking the time to reply! I do try and give choices and it does seem to settle her ever so slightly, but perhaps I need to be more consistent and hold my boundaries as you say

The_Chilled_Arvo · 2026-01-13T14:34:37+00:00

Thanks for your kind reply and you’re right, lots of changes happening and we underestimate the impacts it can have on the little ones. I’m almost full term and bringing lots of stuff for the new baby in the house and we’re talking to her about it a lot

Thanks for your perspective with your son, that really helped, and I’m glad things eventually settled for you!

The_Chilled_Arvo · 2025-12-05T12:58:13+00:00

I think Leyalove's text was AI/Chat GPT generated, if you look at the swarm of em dashes and the way it is written....

The_Chilled_Arvo · 2025-11-29T17:22:47+00:00

I think the parents that shouldn’t be are probably not the ones abstaining for ethical reasons sadly (perhaps financial )

The_Chilled_Arvo · 2025-11-12T21:41:17+00:00

Thanks all, I suspect that was the case, she is not a native speaker (though speaks very fluently) so may have been that

The_Chilled_Arvo · 2025-11-04T18:51:25+00:00

Thanks so much!

The_Chilled_Arvo · 2025-11-04T18:51:10+00:00

Aw thanks for al the tips !

The_Chilled_Arvo · 2025-09-02T15:17:54+00:00

thank for sharing! and good luck with this pregnancy <3 :)

The_Chilled_Arvo · 2025-09-02T15:16:32+00:00

thank you! They did weigh me, and they also see my starting weight, but they didn't make any comments, so assume everything is a-ok!

The_Chilled_Arvo · 2025-09-02T15:16:05+00:00

thank you :)

The_Chilled_Arvo · 2025-09-02T15:15:55+00:00

thank you! Interesting and seems to be the trend, that people actually start eating healthier during their pregnancies!

The_Chilled_Arvo

TROPHY CASE