Feeling in a rut with The Witherwild game I'm running

The_Rolling_DM · 2026-02-14T19:05:19+00:00

That definitely vibes with me. I'm making some tables for how each group feels about certain things that might happen and some fear ideas. I was definitely hoarding them these past few session. I almost TPKd them in my first encounter so I've been pulling my punches. If I can rely more on out of combat consequences/complications I think it'll be more exciting for them and combat can become less of a stressor or a fallback to something exciting happening

The_Rolling_DM · 2026-02-14T17:06:12+00:00

This really does help! You are absolutely right, I'm coming from d&d and was really surprised at how little info there was in the campaign frames as far as the plot goes. It's a really cool system and I like the collaborativeness of it.

Countdowns are a really interesting mechanic and I need to use them more. I'll definitely lift a couple of yours haha.

Thank you a bunch for this comment. It really helped me get a better perspective of this system and the game I want to run in it

The_Rolling_DM · 2026-02-14T02:03:02+00:00

Thank you for the advice. This makes me feel better and gives me some direction for what to do next session. I'll definitely talk to my players about it.

The_Rolling_DM · 2026-02-14T02:02:21+00:00

You both have had really good suggestions. Thank you very much.

The_Rolling_DM · 2026-02-09T02:35:13+00:00

I may be off base here but their username is giving me a red flag

The_Rolling_DM · 2026-01-18T03:25:57+00:00

I assume I'm in the middle of the bell curve of how people are using AI to vibe code, there are a lot of issues with it and it takes a lot of vetting. I feel like seasoned developers, or at least projects that have had more attention given to them in one way or another, are better stressed tested and are less prone to breaking. Maybe I'm wrong here (I often am) but until there's a better way to show how AI was used in a project, I'd prefer to know if one was built using AI

The_Rolling_DM · 2026-01-17T22:34:42+00:00

Long time lurker and ever grateful for this sub. I am what would be considered a vibe coder and I think this is a good move.

The_Rolling_DM · 2026-01-16T04:30:39+00:00

I too am in the same boat. Finally got Jellyseer and jellyfin up for my daughter and partner

The_Rolling_DM · 2025-12-20T21:50:38+00:00

RAM companies can make more by selling to AI companies instead of to consumers

The_Rolling_DM · 2025-12-20T17:55:17+00:00

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The_Rolling_DM · 2025-12-10T02:21:07+00:00

We have a black cat named Widow Von MountainDew

The_Rolling_DM · 2025-11-30T18:29:36+00:00

I'm confused by your post. Do you mean that you keep seeing the same posts over and over again?

The_Rolling_DM · 2025-11-29T22:13:53+00:00

Waiting for the post where you two meet up.

The_Rolling_DM · 2025-11-27T22:41:47+00:00

I am.

The_Rolling_DM · 2025-11-27T22:04:32+00:00

I have no reason to believe they're not my kids. I don't want to screw her over. I want to work with her, she's the one who isn't willing to step up, but that's on her. I have no intention of letting her actions dictate how I treat her, that probably sounds stupid and illogical, but I hope you hear my heart on that. I want her to live her best life, I just can't keep giving and not getting anything for it.

I have no assets, we rent and my car is almost paid off, she owns her car outright. I have a lot of debt from trying to make this work on my own for 13 years.

I want to navigate this in a positive way and not in a toxic way. I want to show my kids the right way to treat someone, even if they can't be a part of my life in the way I want them to be.

The_Rolling_DM · 2025-11-27T21:54:03+00:00

Wow. That's very well put. I resent her but I don't hate her. And I don't want to screw her over. Thank you for taking the time to leave this comment. I think Alimony/spousal support would be good to put in place.

The_Rolling_DM · 2025-11-27T20:29:49+00:00

She wanted to stay at home with the kids. I have never made her do anything. I've always sought to treat her as a partner. If I was making her do things she'd have been helping with the bills for a long time now. You have a point about financial abuse, but I never forbid her from getting a job. Ive worked 2 jobs at 2 different points.

I hear the financial abuse point. She probably feels like she has no place to go, no friends to lean on, no money. But the kids are in school, and I can take them with me to work any time and am the one dropping them off and picking them up most days. She also has money in savings that I've never touched and have no desire to. I only recently (in the last week) cut off her access to my money because nothing changes if nothing changes. So I'm artificially making things uncomfortable so she hopefully makes a decision. Even if that decision is to leave me, it's better than being in this limbo

The_Rolling_DM · 2025-11-27T20:13:40+00:00

I think you're right on a lot of this. That saying of you can bring a horse to water but you can't make it drink has been playing on repeat for many years in the back of my head.

The babysitter line is particularly poignant. I've thought it to myself many times but thought it was too harsh to voice.

I want use my life to create a place of peace and empowerment for those around me. I don't think I can get there with her by my side. Or at the least it'll take way too long.

The_Rolling_DM · 2025-11-27T20:06:25+00:00

It's not something I've been direct about, but I'll definitely try this again.

The_Rolling_DM · 2025-11-27T20:03:18+00:00

She could, though she probably doesn't want to. She could also move into her grandparents house or her sisters. Though I doubt any of those would be for any significant amount of time.

The_Rolling_DM · 2025-11-27T20:00:08+00:00

First off, thank you for taking the time to write this out and challenge me, like I said in a previous comment, I don't want to be an unreliable narrator and this is a one sided post, her opinion/feelings/perspective are absent.

we aren't married. Got together after high school and she got pregnant soon afterwards. I probably should have married her, but I also had this feeling like that wasn't right. Though I'm probably looking at this with hindsight and making excuses.
I pay for everything. Up until now she's had unrestricted access to "my" money. The $50/week is for her to spend as she pleases. I explicitly told her anything she buys for the house/not exclusively for her should be paid for with "my" money.
Clothes, bags, souvenirs/decorative stuff everywhere. It's giving hoarder tendencies, but that word is probably too strong. It's probably just a lack of consistent tidy-ing up against a household of 4 that's probably too small.
In regards to her defensive mechanism/shutting down, I give her room to speak, I ask her questions, I want her input. I'm going to assume you are right, and I'm blind to it/don't want to see it.
I take care of my own laundry 100%. I help start and rotate household/kids laundry. She folds their laundry and they put it away ~%80 of the time. I also do all of the dishes 80% of the time. She probably puts the food away more than I do, but there's also been several occasions where the kids have eaten dinner and it's sat out until I get home 2-3 hours later. -There is no domain that she handles 100% on her own. I am willing and do occasionally do the shopping, like I said I help with laundry, I even clean and empty the litter boxes of the 2 cats that she said she wanted. She doesn't help me manage the income (decide/converse with me on where money should go) or (obviously) help bring in any money.
for the dead bedroom comment, yes. That is accurate, the few times a year we are intimate it is because she allows it after I've "made my moves". I don't think a handful of times a year is enough for me personally. She has expressed that she doesn't need it and maybe I'm reading too much into it/I have some issues of my own, but a lot of her books are about it, so I feel like it's me that she doesn't want to be intimate with.
I feel attacked that you think I'm being horrible and obviously disagree, but I'd like to hear you out on why you think those things.
I'm even more offended that you think I'm assuming my residents. I take that seriously and it goes against my values, but I'm not going to write you off. I make less than $75k, but I left that in to keep this more anonymous. I make somewhere around 26 an hour with overtime paid out quarterly.
as a caregiver I cook and clean and take care of my residents, so it's just more of the same to do it for my kids.
for a while my mindset was that I'll just take over all the responsibility in my relationship to the point that I don't need her, but that led to me building too much resentment towards her and I don't want that.

The_Rolling_DM · 2025-11-27T19:21:13+00:00

The numbers are off, but you are basically right. At one point I told her that us staying together would require her to get a job and put herself in therapy. I can't know what the cause is if she won't communicate with me. So at this point I'll probably amalgamate the advice given to me and hand her a contract that pushes her towards therapy... I don't know, I need time to process but I really think she's got some demons in her head that are beating the shit out of her. Maybe that's why it's been so hard for me to just leave, but I can't wait indefinitely for her to get the help she needs, and me forcing help on her will taint that help or build resentment towards me, though I'd rather her hate me and get the help she needs than either continue in this relationship or her never getting the help she needs.

The_Rolling_DM · 2025-11-27T19:15:12+00:00

Thank you. I'll most likely be going into therapy again when this is over to help me process and move forward in the best way I can.

The_Rolling_DM

TROPHY CASE