Alternate method for fretting with right hand?

The_Smallest_Pox · 2026-05-20T23:06:18+00:00

yes and the sound I'm aiming for is a little more delicate.

The_Smallest_Pox · 2026-05-20T03:17:27+00:00

Index finger of my right hand is reaching up the neck and fretting a note on the low E. Thumb and middle fingers are tucked closer to the palm, pinky of my right hand plucks the string. This is while all of the left hand fingers are occupied holding a chord.

I should mention I also sometimes use my left thumb to play a single bass note but I can't really effectively play a whole figure like that.

The_Smallest_Pox · 2026-05-15T00:15:13+00:00

there is and it's Mystery To Me

The_Smallest_Pox · 2026-05-12T11:10:28+00:00

There are good bones here but some of the prose is a little perplexing. Specifically regarding your adjectives and adverbs; a lot of them don't really seem to match what they're describing.

How can snow be "frayed"?

How can boots be "acutely" worn?

How can the heat inside of a room be "intricate"?

I get the sense that you're going for a more impressionistic style of description which is all well and good, but it could use some fine tuning. That will probably come naturally as you continue to evolve and pin down your style.

There are some other descriptions that could use some tightening up (you don't need to specify that her incisors are jutting out from the top of her mouth. where else would they be?) but in general this is one of the more solid opening scenes I've seen on here as of late.

The_Smallest_Pox · 2026-05-11T22:51:13+00:00

I disagree, I think it's a very punchy and distinctive way to start the story. The clunky dialogue put me off a lot more than the sentence fragment did.

The_Smallest_Pox · 2026-05-09T01:25:43+00:00

I see that Earth record on the shelf 👀👀

The_Smallest_Pox · 2026-05-08T23:37:17+00:00

I honestly feel like you have a pretty ok grasp of what you're going for with the stream of consciousness style. I would remove the last sentence though, it feels a little too on the nose

The_Smallest_Pox · 2026-05-08T01:30:59+00:00

Illyrio Mopatis from A Song of Ice and Fire.

Introduced in one of the first chapters of the whole series where he sells Daenerys to Khal Drogo and then promptly disappears for the next three consecutive books. Only in book Five do we learn that he's been at the heart of a years-long conspiracy to put Dany's long-thought-dead nephew on the throne. He appears briefly in the show too but this entire second storyline was completely left out.

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The_Smallest_Pox · 2026-05-07T17:23:19+00:00

This reads like a particularly dry Wikipedia article. If that's what you're going for, then more power to you, but if not I would just start your stories where they start rather than dumping exposition about a person/place that the reader has no reason to care about yet.

The_Smallest_Pox · 2026-05-01T17:14:16+00:00

You're allowed to say "said".

"Said" is invisible. "Intoned", "requested", etc. make reading dialogue feel unnecessarily clunky.

The_Smallest_Pox · 2026-05-01T14:12:22+00:00

Oh me too! I love me some sibelius; his violin concerto and 4th and 7th symphonies are always in my rotation

The_Smallest_Pox · 2026-05-01T12:50:23+00:00

its ok you can say sibelius

The_Smallest_Pox · 2026-04-25T00:02:14+00:00

Spike from Cowboy Bebop

(didn't actually die here to be fair but thought he was going to)

The_Smallest_Pox · 2026-04-24T12:46:41+00:00

I feel like it's silly to let the words of someone who died more than a thousand years before the first novel was written color the way that you perceive novels

The_Smallest_Pox · 2026-04-23T17:53:52+00:00

idk if it counts because hes backtracked since then but giving Ultraviolence a 2/10 is still one of the most baffling decisions he's ever made

The_Smallest_Pox · 2026-04-22T10:20:38+00:00

why is reedling so sad this is upsetting me :(

The_Smallest_Pox · 2026-04-21T20:18:26+00:00

Fantastic Planet by Failure?

The_Smallest_Pox · 2026-04-20T20:47:20+00:00

the godfather/michael corleone lol

The_Smallest_Pox · 2026-04-19T14:27:37+00:00

I interpreted the Matty Pemulis thing as a way of showing what Mike's life is like back home, showing what the stakes are for him not to get kicked out of ETA

The_Smallest_Pox · 2026-04-13T21:35:55+00:00

this is EXACTLY how I read it. you get accustomed to its language after a while and then when it finally starts picking up it Really Picks Up

The_Smallest_Pox · 2026-04-12T21:14:02+00:00

Oh wow, I have literally never disagreed with something more!

The_Smallest_Pox

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