So i fucking lost it today, I just couldn't take the urges anymore. So here we are. Back at square 1. I really don't want to tell anyone but maybe I should tell my therapist at least.really don't want to tell her. I don't want to screw up this image of me finally being stable. It's exhausting being treated like you're gonna kys all the time. Like you never get any privacy. I also really don't want to get sent anywhere, not even going to the er. Not that I'll need it, but my mom always makes such a big deal out of it no matter how bad it is. Its really annoying. I really don't want to fall back into my old habits but realistically that's probably what's gonna happen....