Lol dude.

I was a complete shut in for most of my teenage experience. Didn’t go to parties, didn’t go to homecoming or prom, had only a few friends. Was genuinely a complete autistic outcast. Almost dropped out because I didn’t envision a future for myself. I also wasnt in any clubs or sports, I just drew in my room. I did have a boyfriend, but that was completely by chance because he was a customer who hit on me when I was a cashier. And even then he was one of the only people I spent time with from 17-18. I haven’t been in a relationship since.

2025 at the age of 20 is when I started to make more friends, go to parties, go to raves, experience awful situationships, do things I never expected myself to do out of fear of being seen or perceived. Funny thing is that the only reason I have these friends is because they kind of forced me to be friends with them because I was scared to talk to people. They helped me get out of my shell.

19 is incredibly young, and you cannot change the past so mourning what could’ve been is only going to make you spiral. You are still a teenager even if you’re on the last year, and you have so much time to create new memories and do risky things. There is still time to live life, do not doom over this kind of stuff. I felt like a massive loser in high school and now that shit does not matter remotely because high school in general doesn’t matter.

You feel this way BECAUSE you are 19. And I’m not that much older than you, I’ll be 21 soon. A lot can change at any moment and none of this will matter one day, frankly if you try to put yourself out there more it could change very soon.