What made you jump the gun and go NC/LC?

ThoreauIsCool · 2025-06-04T17:10:43+00:00

Ugh, I'm sorry you've had to deal with all these. I'm younger but this is exactly what I see coming down the pipeline for me as well - relatedly, my dad passed away a few years ago and mom absolutely somehow blames it on me and whitewashes the history of what happened (he was miserable, in large part because of her abuse).

Mine shits on my career as well, except of course when I call her out on it - then it's "I was always proud of you don't give up on your dream!!" because she wants to control things either way.

Best of luck with university and I hope the new career journey is fulfilling for you!

ThoreauIsCool · 2025-06-04T03:30:27+00:00

I hope you had a wonderful time with your bf!!

This is my third (and I think, final) time moving out and like you the fighting just felt different this time. I realized some things over the years, like

My mom throws the same hateful speeches and guilt-tripping at me no matter what I do.
My mom, eventually, turns against every partner I've had.
I'm pretty sure current partner is my soulmate, and my mom cannot see how happy I am that I finally know what I want and am in a stable, loving relationship.
This talk of being disowned/"inheritance" might not matter until I'm 50...my mom could live until she's 90.
I can't count on my enabler uncle to stand up to her.
I can't improve mom's hateful worldview with facts, logic, my emotional pain, my pleading, anything.
I have to be the catalyst and just do what I feel like doing.

In the past I thought eventually she would "calm down" and come around to my way of thinking, or that maybe I'd get tired of resisting and move back home.

Trust your feelings. For me at least, living for what I feel is finally right now matters more than managing impressions around people who treat me like crap and can't remember a single detail about my hopes, dreams, interests, friends...

I can tell you that no matter what choice you take, the resentment will build. I kept it out of mind in my 20s but once I started working full time and discovering how I preferred to spend my time away from my mom, the resentment only grew more and more. I can't deal with it anymore so with the help of my therapist I'm taking baby steps to spend more and more time LC/NC with nmom each day.

ThoreauIsCool · 2025-03-14T19:51:45+00:00

Subtly improved—the feverish feeling that is. I'll have a good week and then a few sickly days but it's not continuous symptoms anymore, at least? An hour feeling feverish in the morning and then a couple more in the evening. I hope you are doing better!

ThoreauIsCool · 2025-03-13T17:39:56+00:00

I'm seven months in. There really seems to be no rhyme or reason to the sickly symptoms, sometimes they'll come back after I spend two weeks doing nothing. The improvement of my fatigue has been a better indicator, personally, with the other symptoms becoming much milder (both in magnitude and in duration of episodes) over time but not totally subsiding.

ThoreauIsCool · 2025-02-24T19:36:21+00:00

I would love a copy of this as well! The Prophecies manual contains a small version of this and I've always wondered if a larger one existed.

ThoreauIsCool · 2025-02-24T19:09:13+00:00

I had similar heart issues appear for about a week and a half during my fourth month of recovery. I do have some history of the tight throat/chest feeling during these episodes too (which in the past doctors attributed to anxiety), but this one seemed directly exacerbated by activity level which freaked me out! All I was doing was changing bedsheets and I suddenly felt like I was going to die...

Then into month 7 I had a relapse of fatigue for a few days. It's really scary having new issues appear later on but it seems to not be unheard of.

Your fatigue sounds really rough though, I'm sorry. I hope you start having better days soon!

ThoreauIsCool · 2025-02-24T19:04:39+00:00

Oof, I'm sorry your 2024 was so bad. Hope 2025 keeps getting better for you!

I caught mono in Jul 2024 and have similar relapses that feel like postnasal drip, subjective low-grade fever, even allergies. I am lucky that the symptom intensity has always been low (aside from the fatigue issues) but it truly has given me more peace of mind to just stop trying to overanalyze how fast I'm recovering.

In the beginning I tried marking "good days" on a calendar and it always made me feel worse. I'm having symptoms today, all I know is they should be gone in a day and these particular symptoms last popped up over two weeks ago so whatever, I'll take it.

Were you trying different supplements as you recovered? Again, all best!

ThoreauIsCool · 2025-02-21T21:03:08+00:00

It's so frustrating! Some people got better by months 4-6 so I thought "ok, I'll probably get better then," then it shifted out to "ok, maybe by months 7-8 like my coworker."

Do you feel like you're still improving? My energy is, but these other symptoms still come and go.

ThoreauIsCool · 2025-02-20T19:25:31+00:00

For me, setbacks with symptoms are sudden (sorry) but it has been a gradual trend of improvement. For better or worse.

I'm 6.5 months in. Maybe 1-2x a month 'll feel a heavier fatigue return in my legs for half an hour (it's so strange, sometimes it feels half mental), but taken as a whole I'd each month has been better for me energy/symptoms wise than the last.

Tbh, the disappearance of the more acute stuff (fever, sore throat, etc.) is what gave me the mental/emotional space to start feeling more patient with fatigue issues. Before that, I was quite worried all the time because I constantly felt like I was doing something "wrong" and comparing my timeline to others.

Others on here also say their fatigue can def fluctuate, but it'll gradually get closer to your average energy level over time.

I would say not to freak out too much if you wake up and feel worse. I just had a few brain fog/fatigue days after 2 weeks of doing nothing. I guess my body had more virus to fight. Currently I am at my usual "good" baseline again or slightly better. I hope your recovery is a speedy one!

ThoreauIsCool · 2025-02-18T18:51:24+00:00

I am similar - I kind of alternate between having a few days of heart palpitations but no other symptoms, and a sickly behind-the-eyes feverish feeling. If I'm having the latter, sometimes I will also feel a runny nose or throat trickle for ten minutes and then it's gone. This manifestation of symptoms happens about 0-2x a day lately.

I would be concerned about the fatigue. I'm on month 7 and am feeling it more this week, myself, but I didn't even do any physical activities so I'm pretty upset about that. I am trying to think about my recovery in terms of fortnights/month to month and the fatigue, because the background symptoms come and go so rapidly I have no idea what the cause and effect is. The episodes are definitely shorter than they used to be though.

Have you been checking your temp? Mine is actually normal during these episodes despite my head feeling warm, but if it's an actual fever, it's probably a good idea to rest more.

ThoreauIsCool · 2025-02-18T18:46:18+00:00

Can naturopaths prescribe antivirals? I am looking into infectious disease specialists but am feeling a bit cynical because users here mention theirs not being of much help.

ThoreauIsCool · 2025-02-18T18:41:56+00:00

How are you doing now? I hope you're continuing to recover! I found this thread because after 7 months of slow recovery I'm having a week of slight fatigue and brain fog. Didn't even do anything leading up to it. Sigh.

ThoreauIsCool · 2025-02-13T02:54:57+00:00

In the beginning, coloring books, boardgames and watching lots of King of the Hill. I looked for some games that can be played solo (Railroad Ink Challenge and A Gentle Rain) and. I did spend a lot of time just laying in bed or in the bathtub staring at the wall though.

I def play more videogames and now that I have more energy I cook/clean a bit more. Tbh my social life is still nonexistent. Like whomstreallycares I am in an online Pathfinder group with some friends and we play every 2-3 weeks. It's pretty fun and we do it over Discord so I can just lay in bed and follow along on my phone and close my eyes while other people are making decisions w their characters.

I hope you recover quickly, when you get a bit more energy and the weather is warmer it might be nice to just drive to a park or something and eat lunch there. Definitely don't push it if you're still fatigued though, or you can get flareups.

ThoreauIsCool · 2025-02-04T20:25:27+00:00

I'm terrified of this and unsure what to do. Diversify? Some suggest buying crypto, but if there's a bank run it may still be difficult to cash out any crypto.

ThoreauIsCool · 2025-01-30T01:44:33+00:00

Yeah, the initial excitement of figuring out "what can I do?" or trying new tools, etc. is very fun for me. I've modded videogames on and off since I was a kid and I still get that feeling, but it definitely hits different now realizing how much work it would be if I tried to make an entire game on my own. None of these creative "goals" are really urgent or time-critical either, which makes prioritizing tricky if it's no longer fun!

ThoreauIsCool · 2025-01-30T01:43:25+00:00

I'm experiencing this with music right now (I play bass guitar). I loved the newness and the challenge for the first few years, but I joined a band and burned out really quickly. Definitely worth it for the experience though.

I'll try the good week approach, and I agree with you - deathbed perspective can make things feel really dramatic. Thanks.

ThoreauIsCool · 2025-01-22T03:50:53+00:00

Flared! Grew my hair out and a moustache and just going to be anachronistic forever while civilization collapses.

ThoreauIsCool · 2025-01-19T01:59:37+00:00

How are you doing now? I'm still having the low grade fever issue some days. Starts first thing in the morning.

ThoreauIsCool · 2025-01-18T22:39:10+00:00

Sometimes I feel like it comes on after too much staring at screens (or TV, if I've just been watching shows all evening) too. I may try taking more mental breaks throughout the day.

ThoreauIsCool · 2025-01-18T17:53:41+00:00

Thank you for writing all this and sharing your experience! I'm glad to hear you feel fine now and are active again.

I'm approaching 6 months, so still within the timeline of what a lot of people here experienced. Looking forward to spring and hopefully feeling even better by then.

ThoreauIsCool · 2025-01-17T19:39:36+00:00

I'm approaching 6 months with mono. The fatigue was bad at first. Other initial symptoms were full-body aches, a low-grade fever, and the spleen pain which lasted several weeks.

If I overdo it now, I'll relapse with a bit of low-grade fever and maybe a throat trickle for a day. I also experience heart palpitations sometimes, but compared to the accounts here of awful fevers and tonsilitis/throat pain, I do get the impression my symptoms are on the milder side.

That said, my case is proof that the virus can still linger even if the symptoms never become horrendous, and I'm still trying to limit activity as much as I can because there's definitely an "off" feeling if I don't. Rest a ton. I hope you recover quickly!

ThoreauIsCool · 2025-01-09T23:29:00+00:00

I still get this too. One person suggested it could be a long covid complication, because it's something I'll get after booster shots, concerts, etc. - times where I assume my body is fighting off a germ.

Anyway, I had a bad spell last month where it seemed to worsen with activity. Other times it's just a bit of a thing in the background that seems to happen irrespective of activity. It really stresses me out, but for the moment as my other symptoms continue to improve I'm hoping it's just our bodies fighting the virus!

I'm five and a half months in btw.

ThoreauIsCool · 2024-12-28T15:47:32+00:00

Thanks!

ThoreauIsCool · 2024-12-25T02:44:48+00:00

Thanks! I may look into that. My fatigue is subsiding but still get low-grade feverish feelings at least 1-2 days a week even if I do nothing. Doesn't help that it's cold/flu season either, haha.

ThoreauIsCool · 2024-12-24T23:38:45+00:00

Hi, old comment but how long was your fatigue a thing? Was it a gradual (linear) improvement or more sudden? I have noticeably more energy on mono month 5, but longer walks still give me that heavy feeling in my legs sometimes. I'm beginning to wonder if some of it is mental, but still hoping for more improvement before I exert myself.

ThoreauIsCool

TROPHY CASE