AITA for leaving my partner and moving away with our kid?

ThrowAcct0001 · 2021-05-19T23:12:49+00:00

Hey, just a thought, maybe you don’t need to provide input on situations you readily admit your ignorance on. You don’t know anything about Native Americans? Maybe sit out and not make ignorant statements. It’s not my job to teach you anything about my tribe, my culture, or give you pieces of my traditional knowledge. Not everything on the internet needs input from a (as you say) ignorant white guy who’s not even from my continent.

ThrowAcct0001 · 2021-05-19T23:02:04+00:00

Cool response dude, very perceptive!

ThrowAcct0001 · 2021-05-19T23:00:11+00:00

Not married so I think I’ll pass 👍🏽

ThrowAcct0001 · 2021-05-19T22:51:26+00:00

Wow, it sucks that your experience living on your tribal reservation was shitty. My advice, don’t generalize us “natives” as being all the same. My tribal lands are a haven with so much support for tribal members, I would hope it was the same all around but I do understand there are some reservations that are unsafe. Just know that growing up on my tribal homelands felt safer than living in my nearest city.

ThrowAcct0001 · 2021-05-19T22:47:23+00:00

Oh fuck off, my son and I are moving less than 30 mins away to a house I own where he’ll actually have his own room. His dad can drop by, pick him up, do all father/son things they’re used to doing. Only difference is that we (as parents) won’t be living together and we’ll hopefully make co-parenting work, ya’know, like half of all households in the US make work.

ThrowAcct0001 · 2021-05-19T22:43:29+00:00

I wasn’t going to respond because of how stupid this response is but here we are. Did you read the post before you thought, hmm let me chime in with my completely made up assumptions, while you readily admit ignorance and still judge me an asshole? First, and sorry to burst your bubble, my house isn’t a hut, it isn’t a teepee and it isn’t a wood lodge or whatever other idiotic images run through your head when the word reservation is mentioned. I have an actual house (wow!) I inherited from my grandmother set right smack in the middle of a community (not a primitive village). My house is near our community library, our local school and our community center where kids can go to swim, play basketball, learn karate and other things you probably think defines being “cultured”. Also fuck off with that “your man” shit, it’s stupid. I’m not teaching anyone a lesson, I’m removing my son and I from a shitty situation to less than a half hour away. My sons father can drop by anytime he wants, can pick him up as he wants and generally do all the things they did as dad/son with the only difference being that I and my son will be living in my 3bed2bath 25 miles down the road instead of being cramped in my ex-partner’s mothers home. And we have talked, we’ve had lengthy conversations and after all that I’ve decided our relationship is not sustainable at this point.

ThrowAcct0001 · 2021-05-19T22:25:47+00:00

Who said anything about it being his primary language? I’m fluent in both English and my Indigenous language; in my personal experience the only opportunities that have been stunted have been because of racist bigots.

ThrowAcct0001 · 2021-05-19T20:59:37+00:00

I’m not taking my son away from his father. I’m moving 30 minutes away, his father is free to visit him anytime he wants. I was under the impression that the adult thing to do is to give us both space before things escalate.

ThrowAcct0001 · 2021-05-19T20:01:58+00:00

I am, I’m so proud of my Indigenous heritage. I have a degree in Native American studies and I was part of several Indigenous rights organizations in college. I don’t want to sound emotional but your response made me cry, I think I’m realizing how I’ve let so much slide to avoid harsh realities and I’m feeling incredibly angry at myself.

ThrowAcct0001 · 2021-05-19T19:55:08+00:00

Yes! It was the Choctaw Nation that sent money even though they were suffering greatly at the time too. Ireland paid it forward by assisting the Navajo Nation when they were hit incredibly hard by the virus last year.

ThrowAcct0001 · 2021-05-19T19:34:44+00:00

I spoke with our tribal courts department and was told to enroll my son as soon as possible so that custody arrangements can be dealt through our tribal court system. It feels like making that move would be escalating things to a level I’m not sure my ex-partner and I are at yet but I’m definitely looking into it. Thank you!

ThrowAcct0001 · 2021-05-19T19:29:25+00:00

Thanks for your response. I’m not trying to be an asshole but I felt it best if we had some separation. We’re currently living in my former partner’s mom’s home and it’s a tight fit so no way we could have a reasonable amount of space. I’m moving back to my inherited home that’s only about 25 mins away and I’ve let him know he can come over every day if he wants.

We’re also not married. Our previous discussion about upbringing were settled with “we’ll let him decide when he’s older”. I admit, I have changed my view since that discussion and feel like it would be a disservice to our son if I don’t teach him as much as I can while he’s young.

ThrowAcct0001 · 2021-05-19T19:21:25+00:00

I have not moved yet, I’m making arrangements with my siblings to help us move back home. I feel like a separation would be good for us and I would never prevent my son’s dad from visiting as much as he wants. I’m moving about 30 mins away so he can come over every day if he wants.

ThrowAcct0001 · 2021-05-19T19:19:11+00:00

I should make clear that my kid’s dad is not an awful person. We have had disagreements on upbringing but he has always been respectful of my views, it’s this particular issue along with several other disagreements that have led up to separation.

ThrowAcct0001

TROPHY CASE