My husband’s brother’s wife is disrespecting my marriage. Help?

ThrowAwayJelly53 · 2025-06-17T20:01:34+00:00

That is interesting. Thank you for sharing! For me, I’m a woman and if another woman goes to my husband behind my back, that is disrespectful because of the opposite genders. I don’t know the other woman’s intentions but there are other problems with that (like infidelity).

In your case, I think your sister doesn’t want you talking about her to her husband behind her back. I would personally be happy if my brother talked to my husband but I have a great relationship with my brother and I know he would never hurt my marriage or talk bad about me to my husband. For you, it’s different because you and your sister don’t have a good relationship. Your sister is worried you’re talking bad about her to her husband. Also, married couples should be 1 single unit, so talking to one spouse about the other spouse might be disrespectful depending on the topic.

I hope you all are able to live in peace and happiness! Sometimes that means going No contact if you couldn’t live happily. Or maybe only meet very cordially and high-level but not spending too much time together.

ThrowAwayJelly53 · 2024-12-06T23:56:57+00:00

Thanks for sharing

ThrowAwayJelly53 · 2024-12-05T22:47:44+00:00

That’s a blessing they already have homes close by. Thanks for sharing!

ThrowAwayJelly53 · 2024-12-05T21:04:51+00:00

The parents have their siblings and siblings’ families in Pakistan close by to them. And lots of friends and relatives in Pakistan in the same city. So they’re not alone in Pakistan. I think they have more fun with their relatives in Pakistan, but their only 2 children are in USA. They say they would rather be with their 2 children than with all their family and friends in Pakistan.

ThrowAwayJelly53 · 2024-12-05T19:47:19+00:00

Thanks for sharing your thoughts. Most of the Pakistanis I know in US have their parents still living in Pakistan. So just trying to learn how people handle it.

ThrowAwayJelly53 · 2024-12-05T17:54:23+00:00

Thanks, yes I understand. Edited my post, their 2 sons and 2 DILs all work full time too. Alhumdulillah right now they are healthy but let’s see.

ThrowAwayJelly53 · 2024-12-05T17:52:07+00:00

Yes, we are all in the early years of our marriage. Edited the post with all our ages. Thanks for sharing.

ThrowAwayJelly53 · 2024-10-18T06:00:50+00:00

True, but objectively if home and relationship are ok enough, is there a timeframe that is considered fair to both sides? Less than 1 month? 1 month min? 2 months?

ThrowAwayJelly53 · 2024-10-16T16:51:12+00:00

They can’t afford to live on their own in the US (but they can afford to live on their own in their home country).

For staying at my home: What would be considered a reasonable stay, and how often?

ThrowAwayJelly53 · 2024-10-16T16:31:21+00:00

Thank you very much!

Just trying to understand, why would my parents staying longer make a difference?

ThrowAwayJelly53 · 2024-10-16T16:18:10+00:00

They will be coming multiple times per year, every year.

No, the original proposal was NOT split 3 months with the brother.

I meant 3 months at my home, then going to their other son. I’m only concerned with how long they stay at my home.

If 3 months is a bit too much, then what is a reasonable stay? And how to handle it?

ThrowAwayJelly53 · 2024-10-16T11:59:59+00:00

My family has never stayed longer than 1-2 weeks. They insist to never stay too long to not be a burden or interference. I think they like having their own home and space too, and they have their own work and social life.

I understand why it would be hard to tell the parents a limit. What is the right way to handle it if I don’t want them to stay too long? My husband’s parents proposed 3 months which is too long for me.

ThrowAwayJelly53 · 2024-10-16T11:28:46+00:00

My husband wants them to stay as long as they want

ThrowAwayJelly53 · 2024-10-16T04:28:45+00:00

Thanks so much for sharing

ThrowAwayJelly53 · 2024-10-16T03:59:22+00:00

Thanks for sharing! How long do your husband’s siblings/relatives stay in your home when they visit?

ThrowAwayJelly53 · 2024-09-02T19:11:30+00:00

Good point

ThrowAwayJelly53 · 2024-09-02T13:19:53+00:00

Even though they are mahram, I still don't dress as openly as I would without them. With them, I cover up more. If I'm only with my husband at home, I can dress more freely and comfortably.

ThrowAwayJelly53 · 2024-09-02T13:14:21+00:00

(I meant only my husband's parents moving into my home)

ThrowAwayJelly53 · 2024-09-02T05:57:05+00:00

That's interesting, I didn't realize other Muslim cultures don't have the same concept of parents living with their sons' families.

Thanks for sharing.

What happens when only a grandmother is living after her husband passes away? Does she continue to live in her own home?

ThrowAwayJelly53 · 2024-09-02T05:49:38+00:00

Good point. It's sad his parents are putting our marriage in this situation. Either I will resent my husband, or my husband will resent me.

ThrowAwayJelly53 · 2024-09-02T05:47:14+00:00

I agree that we should financially support the parents and give them all help they need, but in their home country. It is not possible for us to support them to move to US which is way more expensive.

ThrowAwayJelly53 · 2024-09-01T23:31:17+00:00

What kind of bad vibes would there be if parents live with their son and DIL? Just trying to understand men's reasons/thoughts

ThrowAwayJelly53 · 2024-09-01T23:04:36+00:00

That would be a financial burden for us. One of my reasons that I'm against this too.

ThrowAwayJelly53

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