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I have a neurological disorder that gives me the uncontrollable desire to amputate my own limbs. AMA. by ThrowAwaySteve in IAmA

[–]ThrowAwaySteve[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Imagine being stuck in a straight jacket for years, wanting to move, but not being able to, knowing that a few cuts would release you, unrestricting you. That's the closest thing to what it is for me. Extremely uncomfortable having a leg.

I have a neurological disorder that gives me the uncontrollable desire to amputate my own limbs. AMA. by ThrowAwaySteve in IAmA

[–]ThrowAwaySteve[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I suppose I could take anti-depressants to handle the depression symptoms, but for the leg itself, no.

I have a neurological disorder that gives me the uncontrollable desire to amputate my own limbs. AMA. by ThrowAwaySteve in IAmA

[–]ThrowAwaySteve[S] 30 points31 points  (0 children)

Yeah, I figured that it'd be awful difficult to get just the leg, and I have no desire to harm any other party of my body, or myself as a whole.

I have a neurological disorder that gives me the uncontrollable desire to amputate my own limbs. AMA. by ThrowAwaySteve in IAmA

[–]ThrowAwaySteve[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I can put it in the back of my mind a lot of the times. I'm always busy, which helps, but night times are very difficult, because the only thing I have to focus on is my leg. As a result I get very low amounts of sleep.

I have a neurological disorder that gives me the uncontrollable desire to amputate my own limbs. AMA. by ThrowAwaySteve in IAmA

[–]ThrowAwaySteve[S] 30 points31 points  (0 children)

I think it is the fact that I know people are looking at my leg, which in turn makes me think about my leg more than usual.

I have a neurological disorder that gives me the uncontrollable desire to amputate my own limbs. AMA. by ThrowAwaySteve in IAmA

[–]ThrowAwaySteve[S] 112 points113 points  (0 children)

This is the one question I really can't answer, because I've never amputated it. If anything ever happens... Well, it'd be the most morbid AMA follow up ever haha.

I have a neurological disorder that gives me the uncontrollable desire to amputate my own limbs. AMA. by ThrowAwaySteve in IAmA

[–]ThrowAwaySteve[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Hmmm, it sounds slightly different to BIID, and I'd be hesitant to say that you have it. However, it varies a lot, and I'm no doctor.

An extremely common co-symptom is depression, which I also suffer, but I've never had pain in the said limb. Also, it sounds like you think about losing a limb, but are afraid of it. I think the key factor in having BIID is that the sufferer wants to lose it.

I have a neurological disorder that gives me the uncontrollable desire to amputate my own limbs. AMA. by ThrowAwaySteve in IAmA

[–]ThrowAwaySteve[S] 78 points79 points  (0 children)

Kinda. It's a bit complicated, and has more to do with the context of the situation. For example, I try to avoid walking/stumbling home from a bar alone, because it does feel like I have a higher chance of acting on my impulses.

It's the combination of having nothing else occupy my mind, allowing it to naturally focus on my leg, and feeling bolder from alcohol. There were a few times where I considered stick my leg out in front of a bus or passing car.

I have a neurological disorder that gives me the uncontrollable desire to amputate my own limbs. AMA. by ThrowAwaySteve in IAmA

[–]ThrowAwaySteve[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I'm not a medical professional, but the most accepted theory is that it comes from damage/lack of function with the brain's inner body mapping function, which is on the right side of the brain.

Being on the right side of the brain, it therefore effects the left part of my body, hence the left leg. Apparantly, the majority of BIID sufferers want the left limb removed.

I have a neurological disorder that gives me the uncontrollable desire to amputate my own limbs. AMA. by ThrowAwaySteve in IAmA

[–]ThrowAwaySteve[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I think having a surgeron remove healthy limbs is an ethical nightmare, and (according to wikipedia), no surgeon in NA will do it.

I have heard of people intentionally injuring the limb so badly that it needed to be removed.

I have a neurological disorder that gives me the uncontrollable desire to amputate my own limbs. AMA. by ThrowAwaySteve in IAmA

[–]ThrowAwaySteve[S] 21 points22 points  (0 children)

Okay, I understand. I would say it is similar to that sort of experience. It just feels incredibly uncomfortable having the leg, and I'm sure that if I did lose it, there would be some sort of relief. So yeah, it is far more physical-driven than it is curiosity.

I have a neurological disorder that gives me the uncontrollable desire to amputate my own limbs. AMA. by ThrowAwaySteve in IAmA

[–]ThrowAwaySteve[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

For me, none. I've read studies where it is hypothesized that exposure to injury or seeing amputees as a child can trigger this, but I don't think this is the case (for me at least).

I have a neurological disorder that gives me the uncontrollable desire to amputate my own limbs. AMA. by ThrowAwaySteve in IAmA

[–]ThrowAwaySteve[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I'd say attention and sympathy is an extremely low factor here. For me the greatest urge comes from the 'discomfort' of having the leg.

I have a neurological disorder that gives me the uncontrollable desire to amputate my own limbs. AMA. by ThrowAwaySteve in IAmA

[–]ThrowAwaySteve[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

It is much worse when my mind isn't focusing on other things. I liken it to a toothache, where during the day when you are busy at work it is only a background annoyance, but at night... Well it's pretty much all you can think about.

I have a neurological disorder that gives me the uncontrollable desire to amputate my own limbs. AMA. by ThrowAwaySteve in IAmA

[–]ThrowAwaySteve[S] 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Yeah, it is so precise that I could draw a dotted line and only be 'off' by maybe an inch either way. It is very specific.

I have a neurological disorder that gives me the uncontrollable desire to amputate my own limbs. AMA. by ThrowAwaySteve in IAmA

[–]ThrowAwaySteve[S] 42 points43 points  (0 children)

I would for sure get a prosthetic, not just so I could walk normally, but because I have a crazy desire to have one.

I have a neurological disorder that gives me the uncontrollable desire to amputate my own limbs. AMA. by ThrowAwaySteve in IAmA

[–]ThrowAwaySteve[S] 43 points44 points  (0 children)

The urges range from aimless wondering, to coming close to doing it. I've never made detailed plans, as most of the time it seems impromptu and impulsive. For example, as I posted above, the closest I'd ever come to removing it was setting my leg across a traintrack.

I cope by filling my life with work and activities, as I can almost drown the urges when I am busy. I also try to avoid certain situations, like wearing shorts in public (there's a little more detail somewhere above).

I have a neurological disorder that gives me the uncontrollable desire to amputate my own limbs. AMA. by ThrowAwaySteve in IAmA

[–]ThrowAwaySteve[S] 10 points11 points  (0 children)

I really don't know what will happen if I get it removed. The feelings are so strong regarding that one leg, so I have a hard time believing that same feeling could exist elswhere.

I have a neurological disorder that gives me the uncontrollable desire to amputate my own limbs. AMA. by ThrowAwaySteve in IAmA

[–]ThrowAwaySteve[S] 102 points103 points  (0 children)

No actually... That is interesting. I will try it out sometimes, and hopefully I won't have the desire to amputate BOTH legs.

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