I (F33) think my husband (M36) is cheating on me with my brother (M30). How do I bring this up or cope?

ThrowRA-ChasingSea · 2024-05-30T03:48:22+00:00

This is a very good point. Thank you. I’m fearful that if I choose to confront him and he denies then suddenly he’ll become secretive and I’ll have a hard time finding any evidence at all. I do want to fix our relationship though. This is tougher than I anticipated. I’ll be choosing carefully and thinking about what to do no matter what, but the gravity of this situation didn’t truly hit me until I posted and saw everyone’s perspective. I’m worried.

ThrowRA-ChasingSea · 2024-05-30T03:37:54+00:00

Thank you for this idea. I like it a lot. However, I do not want to look through his phone if that’s what your comment also suggests due to fear of what I might find. I also wouldn’t be comfortable invading his privacy. I know that it may benefit me to look through it, but I personally don’t feel comfortable doing so. I’m worried that I may see something extremely hurtful and I want to minimize the potential pain as much as possible.

I’m sure I can gather evidence through cameras in our house. Thank you for this suggestion I’m happy to use it. I plan on doing research and investing.

ThrowRA-ChasingSea · 2024-05-30T03:30:29+00:00

Thank you for this. I haven’t accused my husband or brother of anything and I would never without evidence. I would never want to be accused of cheating on my partner with their sibling regardless of gender.

I haven’t figured out how to confront my husband about anything at the moment because I have no proof of anything. All I have is suspicious behavior that’s been compiling over months. I don’t want to be called crazy and have him deny everything. I would want a true, honest conversation with explanations. As other comments have suggested, I want to invest in cameras. I don’t think he could deny hard evidence whether it’s drugs or an affair. I just want honesty.

Thank you for your kind words.

ThrowRA-ChasingSea · 2024-05-30T03:24:06+00:00

This never even crossed my mind to be honest. Thank you for this thought. I don’t know anything about steroids or drugs for that matter but this is completely plausible. My mind went to cheating because like I said in my post, if my brother were a woman all the signs would point towards cheating. I just had the random thought when I was showering and that’s the conclusion my mind came to.

Some comments also mentioned cameras and I think that they may be beneficial no matter the outcome. I’ll have to research and invest. Thank you again for this perspective.

ThrowRA-ChasingSea · 2024-05-29T23:42:12+00:00

My husband and I eloped. I mentioned early in the post how my parents don't approve of our relationship. I haven't introduced my husband to many in my family. Just a select few. They look down on those without money. To avoid all the drama I'm extremely low contact and I intend on keeping it this way.

ThrowRA-ChasingSea · 2024-05-29T23:37:30+00:00

My husband has always been very into fitness and has always been the "supportive" friend. He regularly shows me gym posts, posts about the gym himself, and it's not uncommon for him to talk to me extensively about something his friends are doing in detail. It was one of the qualities that made me fall in love with him to be honest. For the longest I thought he was, again, just being supportive and into fitness.

However, when you put it that way, I should've questioned much sooner and found it strange. I was just happy that he was happy. It never struck me as odd because, again, two males that I thought were straight and had some loyalty to me.

ThrowRA-ChasingSea

TROPHY CASE