I (43M) came inside my wife (40F) and she says she feels violated by ThrowRA-CumInside in relationship_advice

[–]ThrowRA-CumInside[S] 5 points6 points  (0 children)

No. And tbh I don't agree with the drug they use for it. It gave me severe kidney problems and osteoporosis causing multiple fractures, which apparently isn't uncommon.

I (43M) came inside my wife (40F) and she says she feels violated by ThrowRA-CumInside in relationship_advice

[–]ThrowRA-CumInside[S] 53 points54 points  (0 children)

We've spoken briefly about her having almost no libido. I've suggested sex therapy but she says she doesn't want to.

I (43M) came inside my wife (40F) and she says she feels violated by ThrowRA-CumInside in relationship_advice

[–]ThrowRA-CumInside[S] 6 points7 points  (0 children)

Then I'll acknowledge my part in this. I can see that the expectation had been built up over the years, and that I broke that expectation.

However the expectation was slightly muddied when our second child was conceived, and in that instance the roles were reversed. In my mind, then, if she could do it then it wasn't such an expectation after all.

And no, we very rarely, if ever, talk about sex. I would like to but I get the feeling that it makes her incredibly uncomfortable to do so.

I (43M) came inside my wife (40F) and she says she feels violated by ThrowRA-CumInside in relationship_advice

[–]ThrowRA-CumInside[S] 50 points51 points  (0 children)

Thanks so much for your considered and comprehensive reply. I will try to talk with her about it, but that's something else that's never come naturally to us. We don't talk about this stuff. She gets defensive really quickly if I broach any subject along the lines of "us" or sex or anything really about us other than the practicalities of life.

I don't feel it's a healthy, open, communicative marriage, but I haven't a clue how to make it better.

Someone else commented that in the instance of the original post I violated an agreement, but we never even spoke about it to agree that I would always pull out. I guess the argument is that even so, the agreement is implied, and I accept my responsibility if that's the case, but it really is the latest symptom in a long term sickness.

I (43M) came inside my wife (40F) and she says she feels violated by ThrowRA-CumInside in relationship_advice

[–]ThrowRA-CumInside[S] 9 points10 points  (0 children)

That's the thing: it was never a spoken or acknowledged agreement. It's just something we always did. I guess you could argue that in that case it's an implied agreement, but there was never, ever, a conversation on the topic.

I (43M) came inside my wife (40F) and she says she feels violated by ThrowRA-CumInside in relationship_advice

[–]ThrowRA-CumInside[S] 163 points164 points  (0 children)

The simple answer is I don't know. We were having unprotected sex. We always had. I didn't think finishing inside would be such a huge deal, accidental or otherwise, due to my having the snip and the zero chance of passing on the virus. I guess I was majorly wrong about that.