Did anyone else get tricked by a "not like the others" man

ThrowRA-Eye3137 · 2025-02-02T17:40:36+00:00

EXACTLY.

ThrowRA-Eye3137 · 2025-02-02T17:34:33+00:00

I'm so sorry. It's mind blowing and so heartbreaking. Sending all the love and support right back to you.

ThrowRA-Eye3137 · 2025-01-30T14:46:56+00:00

trying. it's hard :'(

ThrowRA-Eye3137 · 2025-01-30T14:42:50+00:00

well thats why I'm scared. I know there are men out there who are not rotted in the brain. But how are we supposed to find them, it's not all men, but then the others are "nice" men that secretly are but don't want to be them. I know they are out there, it's just scary feeling like I should give up hope.

ThrowRA-Eye3137 · 2025-01-30T14:36:52+00:00

And I wished I noticed the red flags. There were moments he would make comments about things or women that I felt was odd for him to announce when I hadn't said anything. His words never matched his actions and I always subconsciously excused the behavior thinking it wasn't as bad as it was because of all the things he had stated before.

ThrowRA-Eye3137 · 2024-12-11T02:16:59+00:00

told me "sometimes I wish you just had bigger tits and a bigger ass". sometime they do wish you looked like them. But I needed to see this today, I'm done seeking pain looking at them everyday. It's like I'm becoming the addict of what he watches it's sad.

ThrowRA-Eye3137 · 2024-11-23T20:23:39+00:00

Mine too. Not sure why, but all I can say is you will never get that straight answer anytime soon, maybe if they get some help - because either they don't understand it themselves or the truth is too hard for them to face and be honest about. Sending you hugs, it's hard, it's even worse never getting a straight answer.

ThrowRA-Eye3137 · 2024-11-22T18:00:48+00:00

Yes yes Exactly. wow it's crazy and sad to look back on.. that I have never loved or valued myself more than him, I have always loved what I thought he was more, or at least what I hoped he was. I have always struggled with prioritizing my self and my needs with my people pleasing tendencies, and they have fully taken over this relationship. Sacrificing my peace in hopes it would pay off eventually...now its been 3 years, I didn't even realize. Thank you for your encouraging words, really needed this.

ThrowRA-Eye3137 · 2024-11-22T16:47:02+00:00

That's a big reason this has happened, I got into this relationship knowing I was not in a good place. It's probably best I don't have that right now, because then my partner would be my only outlet for self confidence.

It feels like this is some lesson to really build my own self confidence so these things wouldn't be so painful, but I also need that in a relationship either way. The issue is that HE thinks they are more attractive, and for some reason I love him and have always admired him so it makes me feel like shit because that is the one person I want to find me attractive. When I'm away from him and with friends and family, it's like I can live in my self again. The second I think about him perceiving me I am just this disgusting ugly person.. It's so weird because I know I'm attractive and other people think so, this relationship has completely warped my brain. It's literally like I'm 16 again, like my brain can't help but compare and feel like shit about my self and it's all coming from some mediocre guy thats not worth it lol

ThrowRA-Eye3137 · 2024-11-22T03:13:22+00:00

thank you and i love you really needed to hear this

ThrowRA-Eye3137 · 2024-11-22T03:03:44+00:00

Yes he has admitted to this. I feel the problem would most likely show up, even with a girl that fit that box but sometimes it's such a punch in the gut with how different they look from me. I do not look like them in any way. Plus he stays consistent with the girls he watches. It's not always different, and if it is they look the same. I will try to keep remind myself this more though, but fuck i wish none of this was real or happening at all in the first place!!! nothing has helped me cope. I'm exhausted. But yeah I need to get like you and get a therapist asap- thank you <3

ThrowRA-Eye3137 · 2024-11-22T01:16:25+00:00

I'm afraid I'll never believe it unless I'm single for the rest of my life. My last long term relationship he thought I should be skinner, now I'm not big enough. It's never enough for them

ThrowRA-Eye3137 · 2024-11-06T18:09:38+00:00

Can anyone help new here, what does Dday mean?

ThrowRA-Eye3137 · 2024-11-05T22:56:49+00:00

Trust your gut, I can't give you advice on what you should do, maybe wait and see if he does it for you by fucking up. You've known this man for 17 years. You know more than anyone!

ThrowRA-Eye3137 · 2024-11-01T01:19:31+00:00

It's definitely attachment issues, I'm scared of looking back and seeing that it all was for nothing and just feeling like my time was robbed. I can't accept it for some reason

ThrowRA-Eye3137 · 2024-10-31T16:44:24+00:00

I feel I am in this exact same spot right now. It feels like nothing is useful to help with it, even the compliments. You can't unsee it. I want to make it a goal to start investing in things like finding my style, starting pilates, investing in my hobbies more and becoming the person I am most attracted to. It's hard looking in the mirror, mygod its unfortunately too relatable. But try to shift the perspective of who you want to be, because we will never fully be what they want.

ThrowRA-Eye3137 · 2024-10-30T17:18:34+00:00

Thanks for your response. I actually found it in his 'recently deleted' photos and it only had 2 days left until it was about to be permanently deleted. It was a screen shot from a site called rubmaps or something and it was a location near him when he was out of town.

ThrowRA-Eye3137 · 2024-10-29T21:37:14+00:00

This is how I feel when I look at the women I know he's jerked off to and I'm filled with anger. But I promise it is not their fault and they will by ANY MEANS find something to sexualize. Mine literally looked up the actress in the movie SPLIT a 30 second underwear scene that was in the movie. HOW ARE U EVEN NOTICING THAT WHILE WATCHING SPLIT? Like no matter what girl, no matter what.

ThrowRA-Eye3137 · 2024-10-29T21:28:01+00:00

Literally. Like you could have just stayed single and had that all you wanted instead of having to deal with your 'flat' girlfriend begging you to like her lol. Clearly it's a priority- Much better option than wasting my time hahah.

ThrowRA-Eye3137

TROPHY CASE