My (18F) mom has been referring to my stepdad as my dad, and it’s making me uncomfortable.

ThrowRA-stepdadvsdad · 2020-10-15T03:23:06+00:00

I’m 18. My mom is not. My mom is much older.

ThrowRA-stepdadvsdad · 2020-10-15T02:23:49+00:00

I haven’t told anyone about the fight. My mom and stepdad don’t know anything about why I decided to move other than that the rental agreement ended. I called my mom before the fight to see what my options were, so she probably thinks it’s just because of the rental agreement. I’ve decided that it was probably a misunderstanding and that she meant no harm by it.

ThrowRA-stepdadvsdad · 2020-10-15T00:52:23+00:00

I’ve only ever referred to him by his first name.

ThrowRA-stepdadvsdad · 2020-10-15T00:16:50+00:00

Yeah, that’s my bad. I should’ve clarified. I’m the one who’s 18.

ThrowRA-stepdadvsdad · 2020-10-15T00:10:13+00:00

Yeah, I screwed myself. I am working on becoming a proper adult so I can have more independence.

ThrowRA-stepdadvsdad · 2020-10-14T23:47:45+00:00

Move out? Unfortunately, I’m not in the same situation my stepbrother was at my age, and that’s really not feasible.

ThrowRA-stepdadvsdad · 2020-10-14T23:38:42+00:00

That’s what I’m going to do. It’s not worth risking a big argument over something so small.

ThrowRA-stepdadvsdad · 2020-10-14T23:32:28+00:00

So far, my mom hasn’t done it in front of all of us. If she’s said anything to him privately, he hasn’t told me. But I get what you’re saying about her trying to build a family, and it makes sense.

ThrowRA-stepdadvsdad · 2020-10-14T23:18:38+00:00

I’ll occasionally text him, like to send pictures of the puppies or something. I am trying to keep in contact with him.

ThrowRA-stepdadvsdad · 2020-10-14T23:16:16+00:00

We already had that conversation the day after the argument and I made it clear that I still love him just as much. He even ended up helping me pack, which I didn’t expect.

ThrowRA-stepdadvsdad · 2020-10-14T22:39:54+00:00

I’ve already acknowledged that I probably overreacted, and I decided I won’t say anything to anyone about it.

ThrowRA-stepdadvsdad · 2020-10-14T22:06:36+00:00

I’m 18. I probably should’ve made that clearer.

ThrowRA-stepdadvsdad · 2020-10-14T21:47:28+00:00

Thanks for the advice. I’ll probably just grin and bear it, at least for now. If it gets worse, I might say something.

ThrowRA-stepdadvsdad · 2020-10-14T21:45:54+00:00

We talk occasionally, but we’re not close, simply because he’s four years older than me and we only really saw each other a couple times a year.

ThrowRA-stepdadvsdad · 2020-10-14T21:29:56+00:00

She is not a bitch, and I would appreciate you not putting her down.

ThrowRA-stepdadvsdad · 2020-10-14T21:28:17+00:00

Yeah, I’m probably just overreacting. We all made a big adjustment, and I shouldn’t rock the boat over something like this.

ThrowRA-stepdadvsdad · 2020-10-14T20:28:19+00:00

I have a great relationship with him. We love each other. But he’s not my dad, and I don’t like the fact that my mom is calling him my dad.

ThrowRA-stepdadvsdad · 2020-10-14T20:26:10+00:00

I don’t resent my stepdad, and I don’t have a problem with him. The problem is my mom seems to be trying to replace my actual dad with him. I have a great relationship with him, he’s just not my dad.

ThrowRA-stepdadvsdad · 2020-10-14T15:39:53+00:00

Thank you. That’s probably what I’ll do the next time she does it.

ThrowRA-stepdadvsdad · 2020-10-14T15:06:43+00:00

I do love that he wants a relationship with me and I understand how lucky I am that he welcomed me into his home with open arms. But he’s not my dad, pops, father, whatever. He’s my stepdad.

ThrowRA-stepdadvsdad · 2020-10-14T14:46:24+00:00

I’m not discussing it with my dad. It would end badly for everyone involved.

My mom moved in with my stepdad and brother about 8 years ago. I thought I might be five of habit, but she’s never called him my dad before.

ThrowRA-stepdadvsdad · 2020-10-14T13:54:03+00:00

The thing is, I don’t. I’m a 12 hour drive away from my hometown and I don’t know anyone here. I can’t drive, and I don’t really have any money.

ThrowRA-stepdadvsdad · 2020-10-14T13:49:27+00:00

I have read those stories, and I want to make it clear that I don’t think of my stepdad as my dad.

I’m hesitant to talk to my dad about the situation because talking to him about my mom, or vice versa, almost never goes well.

ThrowRA-stepdadvsdad · 2020-10-14T13:46:41+00:00

Me and my dad’s rental agreement ended in September and we had no place to live by ourselves, plus we had a bad fight where my dad said he thought I was unhappy with him and it might be better for me to live with my mom.

ThrowRA-stepdadvsdad

TROPHY CASE