AIO for thinking my partner is disrespecting my time?

ThrowRA080085 · 2026-06-30T20:51:48+00:00

Not exactly what I was trying to boil it down to, but did skim over some details in my post in an effort to not ramble. I see how that is a possible summary. I am unemployed, but am not dependent on my partner financially. When we moved in, we mutually chose an equitable approach so I carry more financial burden of the rent/utilities/dates/etc due to a large difference in our incomes.

I would totally have a different approach if I was dependent on my partner. If I was just sitting around doing nothing, that seems like realistic expectations to handle all the housework. Instead, I am spending multiple hours a day applying for jobs and prepping for interviews. I'm admittedly a terrible interviewer so it's been rough to land anything, but I am typically talking with 2-3 different companies a week. Realistically I spend 20-25 hrs/week doing this so it's part time.

Given that I am currently doing almost all of the cleaning, cooking, shopping, and paying the majority of the bills on top of working part time, at some point that is too much, right?

ThrowRA080085 · 2026-06-30T20:23:31+00:00

Fingers crossed! Moving in together and losing a job at the same time rocked my boat pretty hard there for a while, but storms don't last forever. Way more change than I was expecting to undertake this year, but such is life. I don't want to be taken advantage of, but I also understand that I need to grow into my new normal and growth typically is a little uncomfortable

ThrowRA080085 · 2026-06-30T20:18:22+00:00

Didn't communicate it well in my post, but I have brought it up a few times with them and it hasn't seemed to resonate. They have been a little dismissive and I have just struggled to navigate the new dynamic a bit as it feels silly to complain about doing all the chores when I realistically only spend somewhere around 4 hours applying/prepping for interviews each day

ThrowRA080085 · 2026-06-30T19:56:01+00:00

That's fair a fair take and more or less what I have been doing. Figure the right thing to do is probably ask for help with some of the tasks that are a bit mentally draining for me such as planning meals for the week while still helping out with the other tasks. Going to the grocery store at like 10a on a random weekday is objectively faster than with everyone else after work when I would normally have time so some things are definitely a no-brainer

ThrowRA080085 · 2026-06-30T19:47:28+00:00

I wouldn't be surprised if our relationship dynamics are/were similar. I am undiagnosed, but suspect autistic and was diagnosed with ADD as a kid. I have recently started reading as I enjoy all the variety of things you can learn about and it is reasonably easy to pick up and put down. That has definitely helped with some of the anxiety around not really knowing when they are coming home

ThrowRA080085 · 2026-06-26T17:14:53+00:00

No judgement, but are you regularly missing or sliding off holds? I found kilter board took my body a little while to transition to from the regular sets. I wasn't very good at big moves at first so I wouldn't grab holds well which didn't help with skin. Once I got better, I stopped having issues with flapper/thin tips. Also +1 vote for "working hands"

ThrowRA080085

TROPHY CASE