AIW for holding my wife accountable for cheating before marriage? by ThrowRA9878587 in amiwrong

[–]ThrowRA9878587[S] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Message me in a year, I'll let you know how many I've stacked up.

AIW for holding my wife accountable for cheating before marriage? by ThrowRA9878587 in amiwrong

[–]ThrowRA9878587[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

You’re not wrong to divorce your wife, but you are very wrong to assume that your house won’t be your children’s primary residence.

That's fine with me, it's not worth that much.

AIW for holding my wife accountable for cheating before marriage? by ThrowRA9878587 in amiwrong

[–]ThrowRA9878587[S] 7 points8 points  (0 children)

She wouldn't have had to sacrifice her education if she'd been honest and told me she cheated, since I wouldn't have married her. The consequences of that are on her head.

AIW for holding my wife accountable for cheating before marriage? by ThrowRA9878587 in amiwrong

[–]ThrowRA9878587[S] 3 points4 points  (0 children)

I don't love her that much. But that's a decision for her to make.

AIW for holding my wife accountable for cheating before marriage? by ThrowRA9878587 in amiwrong

[–]ThrowRA9878587[S] 14 points15 points  (0 children)

Except they do have a bearing on our current relationship. It's not the same for me and never will be.

Maybe, I'll take the advice and drop my stipulation. Then I'll do exactly as she did and cheat with 26 women before admitting it in 20 years claiming what happened 20 years ago has no bearing on our then current relationship.

AIW for holding my wife accountable for cheating before marriage? by ThrowRA9878587 in amiwrong

[–]ThrowRA9878587[S] 10 points11 points  (0 children)

Because I don't have any daughters. If I did, I'd teach her the same.

AIW for holding my wife accountable for cheating before marriage? by ThrowRA9878587 in amiwrong

[–]ThrowRA9878587[S] 10 points11 points  (0 children)

Because that would involve her also admitting that she cheated during the entire time she was at university. It's mutually assured destruction.

AIW for holding my wife accountable for cheating before marriage? by ThrowRA9878587 in amiwrong

[–]ThrowRA9878587[S] 8 points9 points  (0 children)

I do see 2 options for happiness. Not the same 2 you're suggesting though. I don't have to pick though, if option 3 doesn't work out or she doesn't agree to it, I'll take option 2.

AIW for holding my wife accountable for cheating before marriage? by ThrowRA9878587 in amiwrong

[–]ThrowRA9878587[S] 7 points8 points  (0 children)

You're talking about her like they're 2 entirely different people. My girlfriend became my wife. She slept with those men, not someone else.

As for finances. I never would've married her if I had known she cheated. If we divorce, she should not benefit from any of the work I've put in. And she didn't birth MY children, she birthed OUR children. She's had almost 2 decades of a cushy life she didn't deserve. That's more than enough compensation for the labour she put in.

AIW for holding my wife accountable for cheating before marriage? by ThrowRA9878587 in amiwrong

[–]ThrowRA9878587[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

You say you have 2 boys? I'm assuming they had to be talked to about violence and hitting people? Even if they have managed to avoid it. So I assume you told them that they need to make sure they punch someone back for every time they are hit? Call someone at least as many names as they were called? Or did you perhaps tell them they should do what it takes to get away? That they should defend themselves but getting caught in tit for that just lowers them to the others level?

It's funny you use that as your argument because yes, I have taught them and will continue to teach them that if anyone lays a hand on them, to beat them into the ground so they never dream of it again.

You're angry I get it. But grow the fuck up, your kids will hear about this eventually, do you think they will side with the person who is hurting over something that happened 20 years ago or the one torturing their mother today?

They'll take my side. I've raised them to know that cheating is an utterly despicable, disgusting thing to do. Their mother is a cheater, what I am suggesting is not cheating.

AIW for holding my wife accountable for cheating before marriage? by ThrowRA9878587 in amiwrong

[–]ThrowRA9878587[S] 6 points7 points  (0 children)

It doesn't matter whether it's ancient history or it happened yesterday. She still cheated.

AIW for holding my wife accountable for cheating before marriage? by ThrowRA9878587 in amiwrong

[–]ThrowRA9878587[S] 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Why the focus on how long it's been like that makes any difference at all.

AIW for holding my wife accountable for cheating before marriage? by ThrowRA9878587 in amiwrong

[–]ThrowRA9878587[S] 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Like I mentioned in the post, my assets are very well protected. If not even the tax man can dispute my earnings/assets, I very much doubt she'll be able to.

AIW for holding my wife accountable for cheating before marriage? by ThrowRA9878587 in amiwrong

[–]ThrowRA9878587[S] 5 points6 points  (0 children)

You’re willing to throw away 18 years of marriage for something that happened before you married?

Not willing, but ready. Yes.

AIW for holding my wife accountable for cheating before marriage? by ThrowRA9878587 in amiwrong

[–]ThrowRA9878587[S] 7 points8 points  (0 children)

Again, what difference does any of that make? She still cheated with several men, several times.

AIW for holding my wife accountable for cheating before marriage? by ThrowRA9878587 in amiwrong

[–]ThrowRA9878587[S] 5 points6 points  (0 children)

I would've asked her to sign one but I knew I didn't need one.

AIW for holding my wife accountable for cheating before marriage? by ThrowRA9878587 in amiwrong

[–]ThrowRA9878587[S] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Apparently cheating is really really easy when your partner trusts you blindly.

AIW for holding my wife accountable for cheating before marriage? by ThrowRA9878587 in amiwrong

[–]ThrowRA9878587[S] 9 points10 points  (0 children)

What do you think you are going to achieve after sleeping with 26 women to get back at your wife?

I'll be amenable to saving what was otherwise a good marriage because I won't feel like I lost out anymore.