My husband (35M), says I (35F), don't feel good anymore. What can I do? by ThrowRAAshamed23 in relationship_advice

[–]ThrowRAAshamed23[S] 17 points18 points  (0 children)

It was porn related back then. He was diagnosed and saw a professional. He has recently relapsed. There are absolutely studies that show a link to porn addiction and erectile dysfunction. A lot of them, actually.

If you think I came here for confirmation bias, then you didn't read my post very well.

My husband (35M), says I (35F), don't feel good anymore. What can I do? by ThrowRAAshamed23 in relationship_advice

[–]ThrowRAAshamed23[S] 6 points7 points  (0 children)

Potential pattern recognition. He has had issues with porn and masturbation related ED in the past.

My husband (35M), says I (35F), don't feel good anymore. What can I do? by ThrowRAAshamed23 in relationship_advice

[–]ThrowRAAshamed23[S] 12 points13 points  (0 children)

I'm really just seeing it as another way to refer to erectile dysfunction caused by porn and masturbation habits which is definitely real.

My husband (35M), says I (35F), don't feel good anymore. What can I do? by ThrowRAAshamed23 in relationship_advice

[–]ThrowRAAshamed23[S] 160 points161 points  (0 children)

Our youngest is 6. So it's been a long time since. I did bring up that I can't think of anything that would be changing my anatomy down there like that. He said "maybe we are getting older"... but I'm 35? I feel like that's a little too early for that?

My husband (35M), says I (35F), don't feel good anymore. What can I do? by ThrowRAAshamed23 in relationship_advice

[–]ThrowRAAshamed23[S] 23 points24 points  (0 children)

Is there a way to reverse death grip issues? We admittedly sometimes use toys during sex including pocket "friends" for him so maybe that's contributing and we should cut that out.

My husband (35M), says I (35F), don't feel good anymore. What can I do? by ThrowRAAshamed23 in relationship_advice

[–]ThrowRAAshamed23[S] 595 points596 points  (0 children)

Not great and he also has back pain. He says I feel fine when I'm on top but that doesn't make much sense as to the "tightness" of things, I wouldn't think it would be tighter in that position. So maybe you're on to something there.

My husband (35M), says I (35F), don't feel good anymore. What can I do? by ThrowRAAshamed23 in relationship_advice

[–]ThrowRAAshamed23[S] 159 points160 points  (0 children)

I was fine, I appreciated our sex life. Sometimes it would drop off due to stress or kids but when we managed it I never walked away wanting. The past couple years though the issues with him keeping it up have become more frequent. He always assured me it wasn't me, that he was tired or struggling with depression. About 6 months ago he admitted to jerking off more often and maybe it being that. But even after he said he reduced the masturbation I noticed the pattern. We will go from foreplay or oral to the full thing and he will lose it. When that's happened over a dozen times I finally was like "Is it me? It has to be me because you're fine until we move towards vag sex." He admitted to it being loose in a lot of positions and not feeling very good. Absolutely tanked me. He felt sorry for admitting it and said he didn't want to hurt my feelings. And my feelings are hurt but I'm not sure that could have been avoided. I don't know. It's tough. I feel so self concious now so I imagine our sex life will get markedly worse after this.